23 Feb 2012, 9:04 pm
Mindslave
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Joined: 14 Nov 2010
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,034
Location: Where the wild things wish they were
23 Feb 2012, 9:18 pm
23 Feb 2012, 9:23 pm
Mindslave wrote:
My grandmother is always going on about stuff like that. She once told me that my sister should cook me a nice meal. The last time I was up there she mentioned some song by Jerry Lee Lewis "Get into that kitchen and rattle them pots and pans! Get into that kitchen cause I'm a hungry man!" I find it sad yet comical. I think it's a generational thing.
I know that's what it is. It's just frustrating. I asked my bf if he thinks I need to work on my cooking at all and he said, "What? Tell that to my love for your enchiladas." He raved about them when I made them for him before. They were made from a kit of all things but he loooved it. I guess his opinion and my own are really the only ones that matter in this case. I guess I just wanted to vent a little and wonder if other women with AS struggle with not being "wife-y enough" or whatever.
23 Feb 2012, 9:30 pm
23 Feb 2012, 9:51 pm
Tequila wrote:
She sounds a bit authoritarian to be honest.
Eeeyup. I don't even think she knows it. Or she sometimes acts like we would be lost without her guidance. Yes, she's helpful but I'm capable of surviving on my own...once I have a car, license and a job.
23 Feb 2012, 9:52 pm
Erisad wrote:
Eeeyup.
Didn't know you had a bit of Yorkshire in you.
24 Feb 2012, 8:17 am
Tequila wrote:
Erisad wrote:
Eeeyup.
Didn't know you had a bit of Yorkshire in you.
I don't. I just have a bit of brony-ness in me, that's all.
MONKEY
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Joined: 3 Jan 2009
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 9,896
Location: Stoke, England (sometimes :P)
24 Feb 2012, 9:29 am
Oh god the more I hear about your mum the more I sort of don't mind my own, sometimes.
Although mothers teaching their daughter house work skills isn't all that strange even for nowadays, the vast majority (if not all) families I've known naturally fall into traditional roles anyway. The women do tend to do most of the kitchen and house work including the ones that have jobs, which is why "house husbands" are still reported in the national news as a novelty. I think it's ingrained to some degree, and passed down generations through teaching too. I think it was my sister that came home from a friend's house once and remarked that their dad does all the cooking and was genuinely amused by it.
24 Feb 2012, 9:41 am
MONKEY wrote:
Oh god the more I hear about your mum the more I sort of don't mind my own, sometimes.
Although mothers teaching their daughter house work skills isn't all that strange even for nowadays, the vast majority (if not all) families I've known naturally fall into traditional roles anyway. The women do tend to do most of the kitchen and house work including the ones that have jobs, which is why "house husbands" are still reported in the national news as a novelty. I think it's ingrained to some degree, and passed down generations through teaching too. I think it was my sister that came home from a friend's house once and remarked that their dad does all the cooking and was genuinely amused by it.
Although mothers teaching their daughter house work skills isn't all that strange even for nowadays, the vast majority (if not all) families I've known naturally fall into traditional roles anyway. The women do tend to do most of the kitchen and house work including the ones that have jobs, which is why "house husbands" are still reported in the national news as a novelty. I think it's ingrained to some degree, and passed down generations through teaching too. I think it was my sister that came home from a friend's house once and remarked that their dad does all the cooking and was genuinely amused by it.
I know. I just don't like the idea of, "you're a woman, therefore you have to know how to do all of this because your future hubby won't know how." My bf does laundry for crying out loud. He doesn't cook that much but I can teach him stuff.
24 Feb 2012, 10:30 am
24 Feb 2012, 10:36 am
mv wrote:
Erisad wrote:
My mom seems to have this idea of what a perfect wife should be, which seems to be everything aside from what I am now. I do want to get married but I feel she's focusing on the housewife aspect of it too much. Like she'll give me random tips for cleaning and cooking and how to keep a man happy and crap like that. I mean, some of it is useful and I know that she's trying to help but the way she says it sometimes is rather insulting in a very passive aggressive way. "Don't worry, you'll be a good wife for him someday" or "you just need some wife training, that's all." Two nights ago she used it as a way to get me to do the dishes, "time for wife training!" I just laugh like it's a bad joke but I never told her that it bothers me as I don't think she'd change her behavior anyway. Am I being sensitive for being bothered by this? :/
Uh-huh. How'd that work out for her, now?
f**k that noise.
She blames him entirely. Therefore she still says that her wife tactics are still good. Granted my dad did cheat on her but I'm sure mom's not 100% innocent. I don't know. I won't get an objective opinion on this.
I'll do the best that I can when I get to that point.
24 Feb 2012, 10:41 am
curlyfry
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Joined: 13 Jun 2010
Age: 55
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24 Feb 2012, 10:42 am
24 Feb 2012, 10:47 am
curlyfry wrote:
mv wrote:
Uh-huh. How'd that work out for her, now?
f**k that noise.
That's the first thing I thought of LOL.
I'm simply horrified that any bright, ambitious young woman, like the OP, can be held emotional prisoner with this horses**t. Not cool.
For what it's worth, EVERY person should take care of him/herself, to the best of his/her ability. Looked around at the economy these days? There are no guarantees that a man will make more than a woman, or that he'll make enough to carry a household on one income. Those are *extremely*-bygone days. There is no practical reason for gender roles. Only controlling ones.
24 Feb 2012, 10:58 am
mv wrote:
curlyfry wrote:
mv wrote:
Uh-huh. How'd that work out for her, now?
f**k that noise.
That's the first thing I thought of LOL.
I'm simply horrified that any bright, ambitious young woman, like the OP, can be held emotional prisoner with this horses**t. Not cool.
For what it's worth, EVERY person should take care of him/herself, to the best of his/her ability. Looked around at the economy these days? There are no guarantees that a man will make more than a woman, or that he'll make enough to carry a household on one income. Those are *extremely*-bygone days. There is no practical reason for gender roles. Only controlling ones.
Aww, you think I'm all those things? Yay.
I know. I'm doing the best I can, just because I lost one job doesn't mean I'm going to be prescribed to a life of being a housewife. *sigh* The economy blows and finding a job is tough. >.<
24 Feb 2012, 11:22 am
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