Living v/s Dragging on

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I often feel that I am dragging on with life. I have lost the inclination to live life.
sometimes i feel that i am in a parallel world like some computer generated stimulation everything seems unreal.

No matter however hard i try to perfect the things around me they remain messed up
I cant be good enough in my job because of low confidence, low self esteem
I cant socialise or make friendship cause i am too shy, withdrawn, people find me weird
I am cut off from most of my family members.......many of them are not interested in me.
I love travelling but unable to travel due to my hubbys leave problems and also cash strapped
everything looks meaningless now as if i have reached the bleak point there is nothing much to look forward to.

Its a very weird feeling and hard to explain

@saturn money cannot buy happiness
i mean how much more icecreams i can eat, how much more shopping for new clothes can i do
i cant just go around alone everywhere............thats not enjoyment
when there is love, acceptance, care from elders and peer group then life becomes worth living
when everyone around you ignores you, avoids you...........you start feeling that you are not needed on this planet
you should just become invisible and it wont matter to anyone whether you exsist or not

What you are describing sounds like a mild depression. I get these from time to time, just talking to someone about it helps me, and sometimes a sunny day is enough to snap me out of it..

Is there anyone at all you can talk to about this?

Jason

You ARE needed and you DO matter.

I joined a hobby over a decade ago just to satisfy an interest. The people I met through that hobby are now like a second family to me. This is important as I do not have a significant other, my parents are dead, and I have contact with only one of my siblings.

at least you have a spouse.

1. You sound depressed, you should get some help for this.

2. You seem to have an unrealistic expectation of being able to achieve perfection, and then get upset when it doesn't happen. Got news for you! No one, and nothing in life is perfect. Stop expecting the impossible and learn to accept what IS. Just do your normal best, and get on with stuff.

3. The world is not going to flock to anyone's door to fall all over them with offers of friendship and emotional support. For emotional support see a shrink. For friendship get out there and go BE A FRIEND.--

- Volunteer. There are people out there worse off than us who would appreciate your help. You will also meet other volunteers.

- Join a club or take up a hobby. You will get to know people who share your interests.

- Get involved in community activities--attend meetings, go to library sponsored functions, local theater performances-both as audience and as a member of the cast/crew, attend local fairs, local sporting events, etc.

- Exercise. This generates mood boosting endorphins.

- Read funny stories and watch funny shows. This also generates endorphins.

- Eat healthy and enough of it. Too many people starve themselves on inadequate diets, which leave them deprived of nutrients and unsatisfied. This leads to the failure of the diets, unless someone is so crazed to be thin, that they will actually starve themselves into skin and bones. This is very unhealthy and can lead to illness or even death, but so many people are doing that these days. Skin and bones looks like you just got out of a NAZI death camp! It does not look healthy or glamorous! Also hungry, underfed people tend to be low on energy, more cranky, and depressed.

- Get plenty of rest. Being tired also leads to low energy, being cranky, and being depressed.

Take courses in person or online. Some of the online ones are free. The ones taken in person will allow you to meet people.

- If you are unhappy with your job, try a different one, or even become self employed at something you like to do.

I'm sure you can think of even more ways to meet people, and to occupy yourself, so you won't feel so depressed, but do seek professional help if you still have a problem with depression.

I don’t have no answers and no advices to make your feelings go away. And at the end it might be that the advices already given (medication, professional consultation, “be a friend” and so on) aren’t going to do that either. Maybe time will stick to its cliché and heal - a day in a second and a second in a day, a year in an hour and an hour in a year and that moment will burst out again - just happy being alive, just moving as the universe moves and nothing else.

“Nothing to wait”… I started to think about it. What do we wait? What have I waited?

I have stared at the glass on the table and it hasn’t moved yet. But that doesn’t mean it never will. And if it never will… staring at the glass and it eventually moving or staring at the glass and it not moving were still ultimately the same thing.

“Nothing to wait”… You are right. There are no things in the future for us. But what came of that what just a while ago was no-thing and all things? Is it nothing, something or everything…?

I wish you all the best and send my warm thoughts on your way. There are moments when everything is meaningless and nothing just because all of this is so full. But there will become a moment when you’re with the wind, trees, music, your companion, and amazed how completely and fully this life can give and take you.