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tropicalcows
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02 May 2012, 6:25 pm

So we aspies/auties tend to say rude things without even realizing it. What are some of the reactions people have had to you?



Kurgan
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02 May 2012, 6:27 pm

They're either shocked, offended, both of the aforementioned or they think it's extremely funny that I just said that.



Last edited by Kurgan on 02 May 2012, 6:31 pm, edited 1 time in total.

muslimmetalhead
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02 May 2012, 6:29 pm

Ignore me anthink im making f un of them, or if its in a group they think its hilarious


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VagabondAstronomer
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02 May 2012, 6:42 pm

Was nearly written up at work recently due to casually using the words "stupid" and "idiot" about myself, jokingly, to a client. I didn't see the harm, but my supervisor flipped out, to the point of calling me down on the rug. When I tried to discuss it with him (it was the client who joked first), it made matters worse.
Dodged a bullet, but barely.



PaintingDiva
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02 May 2012, 8:23 pm

I have told some hard truths in my time and people either welcome it or they put up their shield and write me off...

No one and I do pretty much mean no one in the NT world wants to be told that Emperor is not wearing clothes.....

It frustrates me regularly and often but I carry on...the fairy tale by Hans Christian Andersen:

Many years ago there was an Emperor so exceedingly fond of new clothes that he spent all his money on being well dressed. He cared nothing about reviewing his soldiers, going to the theatre, or going for a ride in his carriage, except to show off his new clothes. He had a coat for every hour of the day, and instead of saying, as one might, about any other ruler, "The King's in council," here they always said. "The Emperor's in his dressing room."

In the great city where he lived, life was always gay. Every day many strangers came to town, and among them one day came two swindlers. They let it be known they were weavers, and they said they could weave the most magnificent fabrics imaginable. Not only were their colors and patterns uncommonly fine, but clothes made of this cloth had a wonderful way of becoming invisible to anyone who was unfit for his office, or who was unusually stupid.

"Those would be just the clothes for me," thought the Emperor. "If I wore them I would be able to discover which men in my empire are unfit for their posts. And I could tell the wise men from the fools. Yes, I certainly must get some of the stuff woven for me right away." He paid the two swindlers a large sum of money to start work at once.

They set up two looms and pretended to weave, though there was nothing on the looms. All the finest silk and the purest old thread which they demanded went into their traveling bags, while they worked the empty looms far into the night.

"I'd like to know how those weavers are getting on with the cloth," the Emperor thought, but he felt slightly uncomfortable when he remembered that those who were unfit for their position would not be able to see the fabric. It couldn't have been that he doubted himself, yet he thought he'd rather send someone else to see how things were going. The whole town knew about the cloth's peculiar power, and all were impatient to find out how stupid their neighbors were.

"I'll send my honest old minister to the weavers," the Emperor decided. "He'll be the best one to tell me how the material looks, for he's a sensible man and no one does his duty better."

So the honest old minister went to the room where the two swindlers sat working away at their empty looms.

"Heaven help me," he thought as his eyes flew wide open, "I can't see anything at all". But he did not say so.

Both the swindlers begged him to be so kind as to come near to approve the excellent pattern, the beautiful colors. They pointed to the empty looms, and the poor old minister stared as hard as he dared. He couldn't see anything, because there was nothing to see. "Heaven have mercy," he thought. "Can it be that I'm a fool? I'd have never guessed it, and not a soul must know. Am I unfit to be the minister? It would never do to let on that I can't see the cloth."

"Don't hesitate to tell us what you think of it," said one of the weavers.

"Oh, it's beautiful -it's enchanting." The old minister peered through his spectacles. "Such a pattern, what colors!" I'll be sure to tell the Emperor how delighted I am with it."

"We're pleased to hear that," the swindlers said. They proceeded to name all the colors and to explain the intricate pattern. The old minister paid the closest attention, so that he could tell it all to the Emperor. And so he did.

The swindlers at once asked for more money, more silk and gold thread, to get on with the weaving. But it all went into their pockets. Not a thread went into the looms, though they worked at their weaving as hard as ever.

The Emperor presently sent another trustworthy official to see how the work progressed and how soon it would be ready. The same thing happened to him that had happened to the minister. He looked and he looked, but as there was nothing to see in the looms he couldn't see anything.

"Isn't it a beautiful piece of goods?" the swindlers asked him, as they displayed and described their imaginary pattern.

"I know I'm not stupid," the man thought, "so it must be that I'm unworthy of my good office. That's strange. I mustn't let anyone find it out, though." So he praised the material he did not see. He declared he was delighted with the beautiful colors and the exquisite pattern. To the Emperor he said, "It held me spellbound."

All the town was talking of this splendid cloth, and the Emperor wanted to see it for himself while it was still in the looms. Attended by a band of chosen men, among whom were his two old trusted officials-the ones who had been to the weavers-he set out to see the two swindlers. He found them weaving with might and main, but without a thread in their looms.

"Magnificent," said the two officials already duped. "Just look, Your Majesty, what colors! What a design!" They pointed to the empty looms, each supposing that the others could see the stuff.

"What's this?" thought the Emperor. "I can't see anything. This is terrible!

Am I a fool? Am I unfit to be the Emperor? What a thing to happen to me of all people! - Oh! It's very pretty," he said. "It has my highest approval." And he nodded approbation at the empty loom. Nothing could make him say that he couldn't see anything.

His whole retinue stared and stared. One saw no more than another, but they all joined the Emperor in exclaiming, "Oh! It's very pretty," and they advised him to wear clothes made of this wonderful cloth especially for the great procession he was soon to lead. "Magnificent! Excellent! Unsurpassed!" were bandied from mouth to mouth, and everyone did his best to seem well pleased. The Emperor gave each of the swindlers a cross to wear in his buttonhole, and the title of "Sir Weaver."

Before the procession the swindlers sat up all night and burned more than six candles, to show how busy they were finishing the Emperor's new clothes. They pretended to take the cloth off the loom. They made cuts in the air with huge scissors. And at last they said, "Now the Emperor's new clothes are ready for him."

Then the Emperor himself came with his noblest noblemen, and the swindlers each raised an arm as if they were holding something. They said, "These are the trousers, here's the coat, and this is the mantle," naming each garment. "All of them are as light as a spider web. One would almost think he had nothing on, but that's what makes them so fine."

"Exactly," all the noblemen agreed, though they could see nothing, for there was nothing to see.

"If Your Imperial Majesty will condescend to take your clothes off," said the swindlers, "we will help you on with your new ones here in front of the long mirror."

The Emperor undressed, and the swindlers pretended to put his new clothes on him, one garment after another. They took him around the waist and seemed to be fastening something - that was his train-as the Emperor turned round and round before the looking glass.

"How well Your Majesty's new clothes look. Aren't they becoming!" He heard on all sides, "That pattern, so perfect! Those colors, so suitable! It is a magnificent outfit."

Then the minister of public processions announced: "Your Majesty's canopy is waiting outside."

"Well, I'm supposed to be ready," the Emperor said, and turned again for one last look in the mirror. "It is a remarkable fit, isn't it?" He seemed to regard his costume with the greatest interest.

The noblemen who were to carry his train stooped low and reached for the floor as if they were picking up his mantle. Then they pretended to lift and hold it high. They didn't dare admit they had nothing to hold.

So off went the Emperor in procession under his splendid canopy. Everyone in the streets and the windows said, "Oh, how fine are the Emperor's new clothes! Don't they fit him to perfection? And see his long train!" Nobody would confess that he couldn't see anything, for that would prove him either unfit for his position, or a fool. No costume the Emperor had worn beforeas ever such a complete success.

"But he hasn't got anything on," a little child said.

"Did you ever hear such innocent prattle?" said its father. And one person whispered to another what the child had said, "He hasn't anything on. A child says he hasn't anything on."

"But he hasn't got anything on!" the whole town cried out at last.

The Emperor shivered, for he suspected they were right. But he thought, "This procession has got to go on." So he walked more proudly than ever, as his noblemen held high the train that wasn't there at all.



Fenster
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02 May 2012, 8:28 pm

Friends of mine recently learned their lesbian daughter (20 I think) is pregnant.
I said "I think she's doing it wrong."
Thankfully they thought it was funny but not everyone there did.



MeshugenahMama
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02 May 2012, 9:31 pm

I think that this is an area that really causes me a lot of problems. There are times when I as soon as I say something, I think -now why did I say that-that definitely fell in the category of something I am not supposed to say-yes, even though it is true. The vast majority of people avoid me after it happens. But than there are a lot of times when I do this, and I have no idea what I have done, but I know I have done something, people avoid me. There are times when I try to just stay really quiet to avoid saying anything I shouldn't, but I don't have any better results when I do that, so I dont know what the answer is.

The only person who doesn't avoid me, is my husband, because he is too busy sitting back laughing-telling me that I am right and people just don't want to hear the truth. I guess maybe that is the secret to a long relationship-finding someone who is entertained by your quirks and bluntness. :)



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02 May 2012, 10:01 pm

Fenster wrote:
Friends of mine recently learned their lesbian daughter (20 I think) is pregnant.
I said "I think she's doing it wrong."
Thankfully they thought it was funny but not everyone there did.


:lmao:


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02 May 2012, 10:36 pm

I don't know if it's things I say that get me in trouble so much as it's things I don't say that make me come across as rude at times. I've also gotten flack at work for seeming to not pay attention in meetings and such.



MeshugenahMama
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02 May 2012, 10:44 pm

FishStickNick wrote:
I don't know if it's things I say that get me in trouble so much as it's things I don't say that make me come across as rude at times. I've also gotten flack at work for seeming to not pay attention in meetings and such.


I get in trouble on both ends. I say things that I am not supposed to and don't say the things that I am supposed to. It is not unusual for me to be in a situation where I know that there is something that I am most likely supposed to say-but I don't know what, and generally guess wrong.



Shellfish
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02 May 2012, 10:52 pm

PaintingDiva wrote:

It frustrates me regularly and often but I carry on...the fairy tale by Hans Christian Andersen:


Who was an aspie :D


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02 May 2012, 11:17 pm

People laugh(I am not sure if it's because I said something rude or offensive or wrong or if they thought what i said was cute or funny or because I was honest) and my husband used to open his mouth all the time because things I said always shocked him. People don't talk to me anymore and just ignore me (I am not sure if it's because I said something wrong).

One time my aunt typed up a letter and sent it to me for something I wrote in the thank you card to her.



rebbieh
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03 May 2012, 1:21 am

I don't say rude things that often. The only time I do is when I'm really tired or something. However, I think people often might think I'm quite rude because of the things I don't say. For example, I don't say "hello" to people when I meet them. I'm quiet when I'm around groups of people. I don't look most people in the eyes when they talk to me. Those kinds of things.



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03 May 2012, 1:49 am

So that story's basically about the greatest trolls of all time.


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Shadewraith
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04 May 2012, 9:07 am

I say a lot of sarcastic things about serious situations without even thinking. I also tend to go overboard with my sarcasm, resulting in people being offended.

There are also things I do/don't do that could probably be considered rude. I hate shaking hands with people, or even touching people for that matter. I'll usually wash my hands or use hand sanitizer right after, even if they're in front of me. I tend to have my head down while looking up at a person. Or when someone is talking to me, I look the other way and zone out.


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04 May 2012, 9:16 am

Shadewraith wrote:
I hate shaking hands with people, or even touching people for that matter. I'll usually wash my hands or use hand sanitizer right after, even if they're in front of me.


There was a big public health campaign here against hand-shaking, trying to make it more acceptable to refuse, a few years ago when they had the swine flu. It's mostly vanished now, I haven't seen any of the ads or posters in a long time.