Who else is a hopeless romantic?

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Don't feel ashamed about it, women actually find it attractive if you are a romantic.

I am 19 years old, and a virgin. I have always had a dream in my head that I would meet the girl for me someday. Looks are not that important, I just want someone who will be able to love me for who I am and give me emotional support when I need it. I want to lose my virginity to someone I have strong feelings for, not a girl looking for a one night stand. My younger brother tells me that I need to grow a pair and find an escort. Despite what he says, his girlfriend tells me that it is very attractive to be a romantic, and that I will find that special someone eventually. Are any of you guys hopeless romantics like myself? Go ahead and tell your story if you like, that special someone may just read it!

I used to have the exact same mindset, but as the months passed by, I was beginning to realize how much stigma the virginity badge carried. So I lost it at 20 in a one night stand and not for a second did I regret it.

*raises hand*

I am. One of the first girls I went out with, I asked her out for dinner. She thought it was really weird.
Apparently people in Ireland just go get hammered and end up having sex in bathroom of a nightclub.
I went out a few times, just getting drunk but I'd preffer the chance to take her somewhere nice and
be chivalrous and stuff.

Hopeless might not be quite strong enough to describe it.

I had a hopeless romantic mentality a few years ago. I then started to see my friends and family members get into relationships and I figured out that I had to reevaluate my situation. I don't look or hope for romantic relationships anymore. My mentality now is that if I do find someone, that's great ,but if I don't it's no big deal. I feel a lot happier with my new ideal. I don't get as worked up about others being in relationships anymore. I make fun of romance a lot(mostly in cheesy movies), but I guess I'm just sarcastic at times.

Looks are not that important, I just want someone who will be able to love me for who I am and give me emotional support when I need it. I want to lose my virginity to someone I have strong feelings for, not a girl looking for a one night stand.

I'm much the same way. Although, I have a hard time seeing how I could love a girl who I don't find attractive(other than platonic love).

My younger brother tells me that I need to grow a pair and find an escort.

Is he referring to a prostitute? If so, I find his mindset disgusting. I don't have anything against prostitution, but the idea that losing your virginity is so important that if you're still a virgin by 19, you need a prostitute... Bleh.

admirable sentiments, OP. i like how you are approaching this. not everyone is a romantic like you (and that is fine - people are all different), but i am glad you decided to stand up and be proud of your romantic side!

I'm just gonna say I'm a heavy romantic, though too much at times For example, in my high school years, if I had a really heavy crush on a girl, I'd go so far as to write her a piece of music This was kinda moot point, though, since I never actually built up the courage to ask her out, or, if I did, I would always do it wrong I didn't usually give her the piece after that fact because I'd always feel a little crushed at the rejection. Since then, I've never really had the feelings go that far and, even though that's my way of saying it, I've toned it down, since sometimes it gets to a point where it's harmful

Despite the story above, I wouldn't say I'm hopeful because I don't currently have any opportunities at dating, but I wouldn't say things for me are hopeless because I feel romance will happen to me in my life.

Yes, and I would say your brother's advice is more realistic than his girlfriend's.

In my experience women don't necessarily like romantic men, especially if they could be construed as doormats. I think being romantic is a bonus... not the main thing that is sought after.

But in a way your bro's gf has a point as you are still young. I think more 19 year old guys than you realise have never had gfs.

"Raises Hand"

My story is that I became friends with a girl almost 4 years ago. Then about 3 years ago we realised we liked each other and for almost the whole time between then until recently, I kept trying to get things to work, but they never did. I don't exactly know why they didn't. Apparently she's got AS and for a big chunk of time I construed some of her behaviour as sign of her not really being interested in me as more than a friend. Plus I think she just liked to make me work to pursue her because she had low self-esteem. Plus she's a bit of a misandryst (sp?) and that lead to her suspecting the worst of me at times, when my intentions were infact quite noble. Now my life is a bit of an empty shell because I had a lot of feelings for her, and imagined us having a future together, and even made certain decisions with regards to work and hobbies, based on the idea that things would work out between us.

Another thing, was that before a more than platonic relationship started to blossom, I had kind of given up hope of finding someone I liked enough and who would like me enough, for a long-term relationship could develop. Then for a long time it seemed like there was a good chance of this happening. And now I feel like it won't again, because even before we acknowledged attraction for one another, we kind of had a once in a lifetime friendship (at least from my pov. And it was a genuine friendship to start with.. I wasn't attracted to her when we first met in all honesty).

So alarm bells do ring in my head when I hear of noble squires like the OP announcing their dedication for yet unfulfilled dreams of Romantic relationships. It's ultimately a very naiive project, of a sensitive soul in a dog eat dog world (the love world). I would advise getting any experience you can with women, and read things like The Game by Neil Strauss, and some Judith Butler before you make any romantic commitments. I often thought that if I had more experience and some of the knowledge I have now, before I entered into the situation described above, then things would have turned out better, or I wouldn't have got burned quite so badly by the situation (emotionally, and in terms of giving up other things to pursue the relationship).

yes, many women do like romantic men. it depends on the female.

Yes and I like your way of thinking on this matter.
I think my own downfall is evaluating a plan of action after the first day of contact.
Yeah, I'm really self-aware.

Depends what you mean by Romantic...

Although they wouldn't admit it, I think many of the women I know would perceive Brett's ideals as a sign that's he's inferior to alpha males. And that these ideals would contribute towards a picture of him, that they (the women) would not find attractive.

no, women don't go for "alpha" males, otherwise such men would have harems while other men remained single. females each like something slightly different, which works well so that the majority of people are not excluded from dating. some women like men to be romantic and others do not. it depends.