Could I please get banned?

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I've sent this privately to the moderators, but have received no response. I would like to be banned from this forum. It feeds my obsession about whether or not I have AS, and all I do is worry that I have no social skills and no one likes me at work. So this is really not the place for me to be, but because of my obsession I keep coming back in here. Yes I need meds and therapy for OCD, but because of not being in an HMO anymore I need to find new doctors for this. So in the meantime it's best for me not to read or hear about AS at all unless absolutely necessary. So is there any way I cuold be banned?

Norah, that's awful that it's gotten to this point for you. How will you stay away from the other AS boards? Why are you so obsessed with a definitive label? Lots of people here are not 100% sure whether they have it or not; I am about 80-90% sure on any given day, but there is still that 10-20% realm of doubt.

Because I don't have a positive picture of AS at all...I first heard about it on a horrible board for spouses of AS men, and I have a horrible picture of it in the back of my mind no matter how many cool actual Aspies I meet online, that I'm like the very worst of those AS husbands on that forum, who may not even have been AS. To me AS means you have no social skills and everyone thinks there's something "wrong" with you, but that they won't believe you if you tell them it's not your fault. It also means you don't understand everything, take everything literally, and if someone at work tells you to, say, make a report of some kind you have to have everything spelled out. EVer since I started this current obsession at work it's caused more and more problems for me at work, even though I was doing OK I just am so freaked out by anything having to do with AS that I'm not at all rational or logical about it.

My reaction was the same when I first learned about AS. In fact the person who told me about it, was trying to insult my son and me by saying it.

Maybe it would help if you met a few of us in the flesh, like?

Yes, I really think it would!

Oh no, that sucks. What a jerk.

Norah, a great starter to a more positive image of AS guys would be Alex's interview, on the main page, centre. *Do* give it a listen!

I was horrified - not so long ago - about being AS. It was the people on this website that straightened me out. I'm not saying whether you should stay or go, just that I'm glad I stayed.

And listen to Alex.

WOW! Norah,

To tell you the truth, they say similar crazy things about males! Some MYTHS!?!?

UNFEELING
DIRTY
ARROGANT
NASTY
MISOGYNISTIC
SEX CRAZED
STUPID
ETC.....

NONE of that is true, but even some MEN claim it! HECK, the same is said of Americans, French, Germans, Irish, etc....

HEY, can it be true of some? SURE! I am part german, Irish, and male, yet this isn't true of me. My maternal grandmother even thought she might be part french.(She was irish catholic, so this is like making her a black sheep!)

Anyway, I guess it is like any other thing. Some jewish people would probably shun me just because I am part german. Not too long ago, I would probably have had a problem getting hired in the US because I am part Irish. And YEP, some women have bad ideas about men. Frankly, I haven't told anyone about my beliefs. Maybe it is better that way. People ALWAYS seem to treat you a little different if they have preconcieved notions about something they find out about you.

BTW INTERESTING thing! A lot of people talk about masons like they are EVIL, and claim some secret organization called "knights of templar" DOES exist, and might be associated with the masons! I found out the TRUTH! Want to hear?

1. The Knights of templar DO exist, and aren't secret!
2. They ARE masons, ALSO NOT a secret!
3. Some masons got together one day and started a PHILANTHROPIC organization! The name? The shriners!

Yet all those lies were told, and believed! I don't know about special agreements, etc... They may exist. Who knows. The fact is that they aren't evil, etc...

So why am I here? I'm CURIOUS! I almost want to gt back to my roots. Some of the quirks would be welcomed for more of the benefits. As for me?

1. I look normal!
2. I am usually left to myself, so physical things, outside of handshakes, usually don't happen.
3. Light and alarm issues only happen 1-3 times a year and it isn't like I am screaming, etc... and it is brief.
4. Outside of an umbilical hernia I never bothered to get fixed and that nobody knows about, and a little arthritis caused by older age and a mineral deficiency I eventually diagnosed(doctors thought I was OK for YEARS, and then magically diagnosed the arthritis), and a dissected aorta(just dumb luck), I am healthy.
5. According to IQ tests, my problem solving skills, and people that know me, I am pretty smart.
6. The fact that I am agnostic, not interested in sports or other senseless activities, and lacking social skills is the only real problem. My reflexs could be better, but I don't know how much is due to the lack of sports, etc....
7. ALSO, I have had lots of obsessive interests and have gotten to where I was obviously well informed on each.

Outside of my early hyperlexia(BTW I use the term in its REAL and original meaning of HYPER (over/excessive) LEXIA(language). There are some sites that CLAIM to list "symptoms" of hyperlexia, and end up listing all the symptoms of autism. They have that BACKWARDS! They are talking about autism, where hyperlexia may be a symptom. That is one of the main symptoms that distinguishes regular autism from AS. ), and some early autistic behaviour, the skewed senses are about the only thing that makes me think I am autistic. I have always been in normal schools, and treated by the schools as if I was normal.

Still, it IS interesting. I never had a problem understanding language as used(Writen OR spoken). That is a bigger feat than some may realize, having to deal with mispronunciations, accents, etc... People are more likely to misunderstand ME! That is one reason why I am learning 2 of the languages I'm learning.

Steve

Norah, the person who told me about AS did so to prove to me that my son was "ret*d" and that it was my fault because I too was "deficient." I was very insulted and my first reaction was to try to "prove" how normal I was... hahaha... needless to say I knew from that moment, that even if he was trying to insult me, he was correct about recognizing us in the description of AS. I denied it for a long time but finally realized that I could not run from who I am. Whether I officially have it or not, I certainly have a severe case of something very much like it.

I have learned from experience that banning prevents you from posting, but it does not stop you from reading the stuff that is still accessible to non-members.

This is true, if you were banned, it would only stop you from posting and viewing the Members Only Section and the Adult Asperger Issues forum. There's nothing stopping you from just coming here to view the site, and I think that would increase the problem. In fact, there's nothing stopping you from making another account, so it's really going to get you in a circle back to where you started, by the sound of things.

I do want you to stay, because then this wonderful little world of ours would not just be losing a member, it would be losing a friend, too. I say that you shouldn't be worrying about whether or not you have AS. If I don't have AS, fine, then I don't (even though I've been officially diagnosed), because I don't worry about whether or not I have it. It's not THAT important. I think you should rather be worried about being yourself. Now, everyone give Norah a big hug!

*starts the hug*

It doesn't sound like banning you is the best option. If you don't want to come to the site, it's your responsibility to control your urges because banning only blocks you from posting on the forums, not using other parts of the site.

Those women on the AS spouses forum have greater issues than their husbands.
Nasty hypocritical liars with truly monstrous narcassism issues.

Don't let others complaints and b*tching affect you, sure it hurts, but they don't know you, they're trying to lump everyone with AS into one box, which will never work.

Also, hang around, I was obsessed with these forums for the first month, and I must admit its become a huge part of my daily routine.

However the aspect the questioning, proving, doubting, then questioning cycle has been eliminated by simply speaking to all the different people on here, its taught me that a label is just that, a label, it won't work in all respects, and it doesn't even matter in relation to most things.

However I've needed it to explain certain things to my family etc.

Last edited by Scintillate on 19 Nov 2006, 2:53 am, edited 1 time in total.

Frankly, I wouldn't believe ANY negative things a spouse says. and YEAH, I HAVE known people that claimed their spouses had problems when THEY actually had those problems.

I don't know why, but it is OBVIOUS that these symptoms, etc.... obviously have CONSPIRACIES to badmouth them. To look at hyperlexia, LFA, HFA, Aspergers, you would think they are all the SAME LOUSY disease! They fact is that they AREN'T diseases, hyperlexia and aspergers are primarily good and beneficial, and FEW present all presentations of all of the bad symptoms, in fact, relatively few present all of the symptoms.

It is almost like somone saying that ibuprofin would present all of its sideeffects in everyone. That would clearly be falacious, because sideeffects can include liver damage and DEATH! Aspirin can include brain damage, internal hemoraging, and DEATH! WHEAT can even cause DEATH! So why do we still use them? Such sideeffects are pretty rare. The same is true of autism, even at its most extreme.

Steve