More about eye contact

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We all know that making eye contact with other people can be a real problem. When I was shaving this morning it ocurred to me that I almost never look at my own eyes in the mirror unless I'm trying to remove a stray eyelash or something. For me, looking into my own reflected pupils for more than a few seconds isn't quite the same as looking at someone else's, but it still gives me a really weird feeling and causes my internal consciousness dialog to more or less come to a complete stop. The experience almost always leaves me thinking (afterwords) that I'm a head-case and should stop trying to pretend I'm normal.

If the eyes are supposed to reveal a person's mental state, then what do your own eyes tell you?

I dunno.. I've never had a problem with looking myself in the eye in the mirror.

I don't see my eyes any different to anyone elses, I guess, but I wouldn't know because I don't really look into other peoples eyes for very long.

But I do think the eyes are the widndow to the soul and you can read alot out of people from their eyes.

What I read from my own is what i'm like, i'm willing to be what I read from other peoples is what they're like.

never yeally thought about it before. hmmmm...
A

i have hard time to look my whole face or my eyes in the mirror, an easy explication is that i have even harder time to interpret what i see in my mirror face' image that what i see in other's face

I like to look at myself in the mirror. I helps to give me a sence of physical 'wholeness'. When I look in the mirror I can see where my body parts are in relation to each other. And I forget what I look like easily too. But when I look in mirrors, I don't look at 'me'. I look at the bits of me. I don't see an emotional being. I see an object made of many objects.

ElfMan

Whenever I look in the mirror I always have a look of innocence in my eyes. I think that is how I come off to alot of people, kind of childish, i guess thats why some people treat me that way. I also look in the mirror to admire my beautiful self.


Justin

I agree. And I always look different in photographs than I do in the mirror. It confuses me

I've never really understood what the texts mean when they talk about "pieces of the whole" and body parts. I don't know if it's because I don't have the problem, or if it's because having the problem has robbed me of the alternate perspective.
When I look in the mirror I see a face, but usually I feel like I'm looking at a stranger. It's usually a dispassionate observation, although I certainly make a connection when I scrape myself while shaving because I can both see and feel the results. Still, it always seems like the guy in the mirror is bleeding while I'm the one that's feeling the burn. I think it's this lack of identification with my own image (an extreme case of mind-blindness?) that makes looking into my own reflected pupils such an uncomfortable experience. It feels (to me) as if I was violating someone else's personal space or they are violating mine.
Is that weird? Or is it typical?

Intellectually I know the difference, but it's still like looking at two different people. I don't mind looking at pictures (although the camera makes me look fat). It's just the mirror that freaks me.

Looking into the mirror is fun for me, but sometimes as a kid, it would spook me a little... okay maybe a little more than a little... LOL I felt more like Jetson described when I was a kid.

And yes, I think I have a lovely face, and looking at it is a grounding experience that gives me confidence... confidence that I can then use with other people.

Yes, I do as well. And I find that very unsettling for some reason. Like who is that person???

Even if I am wearing sunglasses, I can't look peoplei n the eye.

SOmetimes when I look someone in the eye, I will glare intensely and lock in and the person I am looking at will react very angrily. I almost never get a positive response to my glares.

The thing I always notice is how completely different I always look in photographs compared to how I look in the mirror - I can never believe its actually me in photos, as it just looks like a totally different person....

That's just because the image is reversed. I am sure everybody feels that way, to some degree. I don't think it is unique to Aspies.

I see myself in photos and think EWWW, do I really look like that?

I look better in the mirror.

Whht are the rules about eye contact anyway since I don't rally know how to make them?

DO I look at both eyes at the same time or look at one eye with both my eyes, or look at one eye with both my eyes then switch to the other person's eye?


Now for th million dollar question. Howdo I stop from being so uncomfortable looking someone in the eye? Even if I am wearing shades?

My facial expressions always weird out on me also. People always treat me differently than from others.

Sorry it's taken so long to get back about this. I don't know how good I will be at wording my expanation but I will try.

When I look at something, say an airplane in the sky for example, I see the wings, the tail, the body, the windows all as seperate bits. Then my brain puts it together like its building a kit model. This happens fairly quickly mostly, but sometimes slower. Especially when I am overloading.

The other week, I was staring and staring at an airplaine and I was thinking "what is that thing sticking out the side of that airplane?...oh it's the wing!" My brain had put the peices together and left off a bit.

I think another factor could be that I tend to ...what can I call it....maybe monofocus on stuff if that makes sense?

ElfMan