Sometimes when a person point out an object and tells me to observe it, pick it up and bring it to them, etc, etc...I can't tell right away exactly which object they're referring to. In the case of an observation request i.e. "See that green frumalingong over there??" sometimes I've faked knowing which one, but they could tell I was lying. I had to say "where?" "where?" and the person would get frustrated and say "there!! there!!" pointing frantically to the spot where I still couldn't see. In the case of a pick-up request, I have often picked up the wrong item, or looked around in vain, frustrated, for exactly which item they were talking about, and once they show their frustration, all bets are off as my mind switches off from distress in true AS fashion. More than once, this type of situation has resulted in the requester coming up to my area and picking the object out for me.
Because it's a processing speed issue for me, and the other person expects me to see the object in question right away, I used the coping strategy of saying "ok, just give me a moment, I'm trying to narrow it down, bear with me..." which is not always satisfactory but doesn't leave me looking like a total fool, unless there are like five other people present (NT) who see the object in question almost immediately. Then the requester knows it's not them, it's me.
This has plagued me since as far back as I can remember, back in the days when clueless shrinks told me I must have ADHD because it was the latest fashionable label. But I don't see this as an ADHD thing, as I wasn't distracted or thinking of something else during these semi-fruitless searches. I would hypothesize that, somehow, it's related to the ASD/NVLD tendency to filter/absorb relevant stimuli in our environment w/o realizing it. But I'm not sure. Even today, after years of counseling and research, I still don't get how I miss certain things that seem much more obvious once they are more clearly identified.