How about:
Quote:
WIFE WANTED - Living, Human, Female. Ages 28 to 35. Any or mixed-race okay.
Must be sane and healthy, and without addictions, amputations, or living children.
Must pass DNA screening for hereditary diseases and natal gender ("XX" only, please!).
Must pass screening for criminal record, security clearances, and FICO score over 700.
No Religious Preference. Submit recent photo and curriculum vitae to...
I'd bet that the man posting this notice in all sincerity would either draw a lot of hostility or be very lonely for the rest of his life.
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No love for Hamas, Hezbollah, Iranian Leadership, Islamic Jihad, other Islamic terrorist groups, OR their supporters and sympathizers.