Page 1 of 1 [ 9 posts ] 

danfan
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jan 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 4

02 Jan 2007, 12:01 pm

hi i've been reading this and several other aspie websites regularly for the past few months and recognised lots of traits in others which apply to myself. then I took three unconnected online tests and they all say I probably have Asperger's too. I am a working mum and the two things I am most scared about right now are could my children be taken away from me and how do I tell colleagues/friends and family? I am seeing my doctor to tell her this next week (dreading this) but I would appreciate any advice anyone can offer... thanks :?



Prof_Pretorius
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Aug 2006
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,520
Location: Hiding in the attic of the Arkham Library

02 Jan 2007, 12:05 pm

I would ask why would your children be taken away? Do you abuse drugs? Do you neglect them in any way that would endanger them? Is the children's father trying to take them from you?

We need a lot of detail to answer such an important question ! !!


_________________
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. I feel my fate in what I cannot fear. I learn by going where I have to go. ~Theodore Roethke


danfan
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jan 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 4

02 Jan 2007, 12:11 pm

Hi I don't know what to expect cos this is still a bit of a shock but no my children are very much loved and looked after - I just don't know if AS people are allowed to be in charge of kids (sorry and no offence meant to anybody) :oops:



SteveK
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Oct 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,899
Location: Chicago, IL

02 Jan 2007, 12:24 pm

danfan,

I fit the profile also, etc... I would make a FAR better father than most. I could do that without their mother.

CPS(in the US) is unreasonable and strict, but I have NEVER heard of them causing trouble for something like this. SO you stim, and maybe daydream. If you have to take care of the kids(EVEN IN THE MIDDLE), you CAN! So your smarter at some things like language and analyzing! That is a PLUS! So your dumber at social things. SO WHAT(makes NO difference)!

The fact is that an AS mother should be AT LEAST as good in every respect, and better in some. Why would you even THINK they might take your kids away?

As for telling your friends? Who says they even have to know? Only YOU can judge really how to handle that. Some may not change, some may laugh and say "HEY, I am too!", and some may never treat you the same again.

Steve



Last edited by SteveK on 02 Jan 2007, 12:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.

DerekD_Goldfish
Toucan
Toucan

User avatar

Joined: 30 Nov 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 286

02 Jan 2007, 12:25 pm

There is no chance of your kids being taken away becase you have AS dont worry



Prof_Pretorius
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Aug 2006
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,520
Location: Hiding in the attic of the Arkham Library

02 Jan 2007, 2:21 pm

You have to be better than that mom who let her toddler wander onto a busy highway. I read about that over the weekend, cars swerving to avoid the tyke. Unbelievable neglect.

You're not drinkin' till yew pass out, and all, are yew ???


_________________
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. I feel my fate in what I cannot fear. I learn by going where I have to go. ~Theodore Roethke


krex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jun 2006
Age: 61
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 4,471
Location: Minnesota

02 Jan 2007, 3:36 pm

There are many parents on this site raising their children,many have kids on the spectrum.Have you noticed any traits in your kids or their father?I would be more concerned about the kids having traits that are causing them difficultys.If you have AS you might not have noticed them in the children,as they seem "normal" to you but cause problems for them in school.

As others mentioned,AS can be very good parents and probably more excepting of any "differences" in their children.(which is a blessing,not to be constantly critisized and blamed for traits beyond the childs control).You are obviously high funtioning as you have managed to raise children and work....not an easy task for many.Knowing about your possible AS can help you learn new techniques to help destress your life.It is not a "progressive disease"....you will not get worse.It is brain wiring and if you have managed your life so far then you have learned coping mechanisms to deal with many traits/sensitivities.Seems like you should be patting yourself on the back for learning how to cope in an "aspie hostile" world.


_________________
Just because one plane is flying out of formation, doesn't mean the formation is on course....R.D.Lang

Visit my wool sculpture blog
http://eyesoftime.blogspot.com/


Leila
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 27 Dec 2006
Gender: Female
Posts: 27

02 Jan 2007, 3:41 pm

Hello. I don't know if you're in the UK or the US, but either way I don't think that your kids can be taken away simply because of an AS diagnosis - I think that for that to happen there has to be demonstrable abuse and/or neglect, and there's nothing in AS in itself that exemplifies that. My father is AS, my mother is not - my father was and still is an excellent parent.



danfan
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jan 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 4

02 Jan 2007, 4:11 pm

really reassuring thanks guys - i am also concerned about my daughter - being picked on at school and not having any real friends; i will ask my doctor if she should be dignosed too xx