eharmony and match.com, does it work?

Post Reply New Topic

has any one try match.com or eharmony and if so does they work. i have been burn on okcupid and i want to know if they are wroth the money to use those sites?

As with anything you normally get better clientele when you pay for a service or venue.
That doesn't guarantee your success in love and life any more than a free service though. Go back a step and ask yourself "will they want this?" "what did I do with my profile before I could change on match.com or even the free site?"

Another thing I wanna mention; even if the users are better on those sites towards others they might have the same tastes and preferences as the ones on the free dating sites. Not only that but much like one would have a greater expectation of the users there that would also mean they have a greater expectation of you as a bachelor. Just some food for thought.

Hope you find your match!

They say they work. There are some testimony about people finding eachother on dating sites.

Me on the other hand, have never heard from any friends who had anything positive to say about dating sites.

The problem with that thinking is, if someone already didn't like something on your profile, they're more than likely not gonna go back a month later and be like "oh I'll see if his/her profile is any better and then maybe I'll consider even responding to a message.

I'm not sure about the OP's case, but I know with me, I live in a city with a small population, and its mostly a retirement place, needless to say they're aren't a lot of people my age in their 20s that use those sites. I go on one and I only see about 30-40 on POF, and its the same girls or less on okcupid or whatever free ones I've found. I know this because most of them ignored my messages and rejected me from the start, and the few that did message me we're probably just doing it to be nice and clearly had no intention of starting anything with me or even wanting to do something as simple as hang out.

I've played the dating site game for almost 3 years now and have been pondering that its probably time to close my accounts. They're a joke to use honestly, and for autistic people like us, it only makes it 10 times harder. I can't tell you alone how many girls that I've had normal conversations with on those sites, and the second I bring up I'm autistic, the messages stopped.

I thought about maybe using some of the paid ones for awhile, but I figured its not worth my time or money. Love is not something that should have to be bought or paid for to find or achieve and I'm doubting there'd be many people from my city close to my age on there anyways. I have no plans to re-locate to another city either just for love and I don't feel thats worth my time or money either.

Never tell a girl you're autistic, until it gets somewhat serious.

when I say i got burn on there, I mean that I would get these week relaylionships, I would get some girl who want someone just to buy them dinner, the don't want a relayionship. or I get someone who wants to play games.

Erm..dude, you don't re-work a dating profile to win the interest of previous visitors. You do it to attract new ones. I won't ask why you applied my way of thinking to winning the approval of people that rejected ot prior but trust me that is not something I would ever suggest. You should always consider improving a dating profile to the point it actually is successful. no matter who is going to look at it.

Your post is a bit of a downer to me, I suppose I might go the the way of Tesla when it comes to romance, now that I think about it more I recall Tesla actually having women attracted to him he just didn't care to make any advances on them.

I'll give you the benefit of the doubt beings your 16 and probably don't have a firm grasp of how the real world works when you get to my age have a job and all. One must take certain priorities in life and sometimes romance can not be one of them. I would also say that comparing me to Tesla is really inaccurate with me attracting women. If you did indeed real all of my post you would see that a good deal of them turn me down right on the spot just because I said I was autistic. I'd hardly call that attracting them. If anything me being autistic is causing me to be rejected more then anything <_<

I've heard that Eharmony will purposefully shunt you into different categories based on your profile and how good your pictures are.. basically limiting who you show up for or who you might get matched with based on certain criteria..

Even going so far as to entirely tell some people "No matches found" at all..

apparently they do this to keep their match success rate high.

If they honestly do this it's incredibly skuzzy..

Personally I feel that the paid services probably have more luck than the free ones simply because it cuts down on two things. 1) women making free accounts to get confidence boosts by the guys who message them and 2) guys are less likely to act like as*holes and pigs when they message women because they are having to actually pay money to make an account.

I've found those two things seem to be the biggest factors working against sites like OkCupid and POF.. is that there are a lot of people on there who make accounts to make themselves feel better.. and then there are a lot of people on there that just blanket spam everyone who's marginally attractive with offers of casual sex or worse.. just to see if maybe they get lucky. All it really does is lead to a lot of people who take the sites seriously not winding up having any luck at all.

Personally, when I used OKCupid, I managed to get 3 dates in about 9 months. The problem is only 1 of the women was actually as attractive as her photos made her out to be when I actually met her, and she was very honest and upfront that after meeting me she only wanted to be friends.. the other two probably would have put out after the first date but honestly I wouldn't have done that no matter what as they both had revoltingly bad self esteem and were not attractive to me at all (even though their photos weren't bad)...

I should also add, the closest of these three was a 30 minute drive away, the best looking of the three was a nearly 2 hour drive to the opposite side of Atlanta... so there was really no future in that anyway.. it was just way too much of a commute.

Another thing to be wary of, some sites, Polish dating for example, you can join free etc, but then you have to pay in order to reply to any messages of interest you might receive.
I have been on a few of these and you get your ideal woman writing to you so you pay the money to write back and hear nothing from anyone again until your subscription runs out, I think they invent people being interested in you just to get you to pay money.

I feel sorry for any genuine girl who might have been interested as she will get no reply from me due to having been conned in this way.

What I now do is ensure my profile is showing the very worst of my traits, like Iam a complete nutcase, in fact one site I made myself out to be the most horrible person you could imagine saying something like I already had a few Women and was after more so that I could con them out of their life savings. And I would still get about 15 "winks" a day, I wonder if they sent my profile to other women claiming I had winked at them when I never winked at anybody in my life.

I think its all a con.

Thats what Zoosk does too! It pisses me off that they always advertise that its free on tv when in reality its just as you said with that other site! I knew right away something was fishy about that site when I started getting messages from girls that I couldn't read without paying when I had literally just made my account not even 10 mins and didn't even have a picture uploaded yet!

I tired them & they didn't work for me. I took eHarmony's quiz/questionnaire thingy a couple different times a year or so apart & I got rejected. I think most Aspies would get rejected by their questionnaire because eHarmoney caters to the more average successful normal person.

I tried match.com, eharmony, plentyoffish.com, and chemistry.com and they didn't work for me. I've been on them for a maximum of a month and I had to get off.

My NT husband and I met on POF.

I'm on okc right now and pursuing a lead who has been employed in facilities dealing with developmental issues, so she might be more able to look past my flaws than the average person would.