Bathroom habits of Spectrum Children?
My wife and I long suspected that my son's bedwetting and pants-soiling issues stemmed from his ADHD tendencies - mostly due to FOMO (Fear of missing out) while playing on the computer or Lego. Any bathroom break would just interrupt the fun!
This article makes the connection in a direct way. Fascinating stuff.
http://totallyadd.com/bathroom-break/
Whattya think?
Well, I can appreciate what the article says...yet, I am not too concerned about the why but more of the how to. Most of our family is on the Autistism Spectrum and the newest member (now age 3.5) is refusing to toilet train. She has the verbal skills to indicate that she needs to go - and some days has no problem going in to go pee. But, number 2? Forget about it! If anybody has any ideas to add to our bag of tricks, it's appreciated. We have tried: routine (same times every day going in to sit on the pot); reinforcement (stickers to trade for dinosaurs); reading; singing; eliminating pull ups completely; high ruffage diet, extra fruit. The doctor has placed her on miralax since she will refuse to go for days even in a pull up. We all keep our cool about it although behind closed doors sometimes we are just totally baffled.
LOL, we were in the same boat with my son and I thought it would be a problem forever. Finally, he just decided. I wish I could give you some wisdom, but the reality is - I think with all potty training, really - that we parents are not as in control as we think.
DS's preschool did talk to him about it being time to move on from pullups, and that at age X, he should stop using them (I think it was 4?) I'm not sure if that helped or not - or if it helped that at one point, we had him take responsibility to find and put on his own pullup and were as matter-of-fact as possible when cleaning him up. Maybe those things helped, maybe not. One day, he just decided he was going in the bathroom and that was that.
My middle child was between 3.5 and 4 when he finally decided to use the toilet consistently. He knew what to do from age 2. I always told people it was less potty training and more promoting potty choice with him.
Two things happened that finally got him. First my mom used to love taking the boys hiking and camping. (His birthday is mid-June) The spring before he turned 4, she told him for a month that if he was still going potty in his pants and wearing pull-ups that she wasn't taking him camping, because she wasn't dealing with that while camping. He didn't buy it and was left behind. A few weeks later it was time to sign up for T-ball. We told him that people wearing pull-ups weren't allowed to play. Not punitively, just fact of life. He sort of stopped to think for a minute, then took off the pull-up and said, "I'm ready for big boy pants now."
And that was it. So no real help, only solidarity in the stubborn potty training child front.
Fear Of Missing Out! Yes! I did not know it had a snazzy acronym. That is totally it. Our son will go, but sometimes I have to look for the butt clench and remind him (nag him) to go, still at 7. He doesn't wipe well b/c it is gross, tedious and he wants to get back to the fun! We have been mainly going with the fact that it saves time (time you can use for fun!) if you do it the right way the first time.
Also, sadly, when I have to go, I make a big deal out of how I am going even though I am interrupting something/missing fun.
I can't wait until everyone can mind his or her individual bathroom habits without it being a thing. LOL
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