Page 1 of 1 [ 14 posts ] 

turtleoverhare
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 24 Jul 2013
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 147
Location: Brisbane, QLD

31 Jul 2013, 2:21 pm

especially at night , I need a girlfriend .



Cornflake
Administrator
Administrator

User avatar

Joined: 30 Oct 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 69,230
Location: Over there

31 Jul 2013, 2:34 pm

[Moved from General Autism Discussion to Love and Dating]


_________________
Giraffe: a ruminant with a view.


Mindslave
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Nov 2010
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,034
Location: Where the wild things wish they were

31 Jul 2013, 3:32 pm

You need to be there for her too. If she is just there to cure your loneliness, it won't work.

You meet women by going out and talking to people. Even if there is no relationship, friendship can be a sufficient cure.



wtfid2
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Aug 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,712
Location: usa

31 Jul 2013, 3:53 pm

Mindslave wrote:
You need to be there for her too. If she is just there to cure your loneliness, it won't work.

You meet women by going out and talking to people. Even if there is no relationship, friendship can be a sufficient cure.
friendships feel empty when you have no relationships..i got no enjoyment out of going out with friends when i had them bc i ws always upset i had no girlfriend.


_________________
AQ 25

Your Aspie score: 101 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 111 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits


deluge1988
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 17

31 Jul 2013, 4:35 pm



Last edited by deluge1988 on 01 Aug 2013, 5:31 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Cafeaulait
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jul 2012
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,539
Location: Europe

31 Jul 2013, 4:43 pm

I feel lonely all the time.
But I guess my whole life´s unfullfilling



turtleoverhare
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 24 Jul 2013
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 147
Location: Brisbane, QLD

31 Jul 2013, 5:05 pm

I can get sex anytime i'm talking a relationship is what I want



wtfid2
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Aug 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,712
Location: usa

31 Jul 2013, 6:13 pm

turtleoverhare wrote:
I can get sex anytime i'm talking a relationship is what I want
here im thinking you relate to the real lonely guys here, and you atleast have physical validation...not downplaying your loneliness but try being lonely nd not getting girls..it's hard.


_________________
AQ 25

Your Aspie score: 101 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 111 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits


turtleoverhare
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 24 Jul 2013
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 147
Location: Brisbane, QLD

31 Jul 2013, 6:23 pm

you can get girls im sure, just need to look, but that is the hard part, trying to act socially "normal" in society, people assume you have something to hide if you don't look at their eyes, I hate that most.



savvyidentity
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 15 Jul 2013
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 450

31 Jul 2013, 6:31 pm

turtleoverhare wrote:
especially at night , I need a girlfriend .


Know how you feel mate, it's the human condition.

turtleoverhare wrote:
I can get sex anytime i'm talking a relationship is what I want


So you don't lack confidence. Any idea what holds you back?



turtleoverhare
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 24 Jul 2013
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 147
Location: Brisbane, QLD

01 Aug 2013, 2:12 am

Hey man , I know exactly what holds me back, I do lack confidence by the way but the fact that I'm a bodybuilder and am 6"2 I guess attracts certain girls to me but once they've realised im socialy not normal they always disassociate themselves with me because I guess they don't like that. I guess I look the part of a "normal" person but not mentally. Plus when I did have a girlfriend who by the way was 2 years older than me and a school teacher. I payed her too much attention and I think that's why we broke up, I don't even know why we broke up but that's my guess, I don't blame her though she may have felt like I was a burden more than a boyfriend, She tried I was with her for 3 odd months... I should shut up now I reckon we will all find someone.



savvyidentity
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 15 Jul 2013
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 450

01 Aug 2013, 4:54 am

turtleoverhare wrote:
Hey man , I know exactly what holds me back, I do lack confidence by the way but the fact that I'm a bodybuilder and am 6"2 I guess attracts certain girls to me but once they've realised im socialy not normal they always disassociate themselves with me because I guess they don't like that. I guess I look the part of a "normal" person but not mentally. Plus when I did have a girlfriend who by the way was 2 years older than me and a school teacher. I payed her too much attention and I think that's why we broke up, I don't even know why we broke up but that's my guess, I don't blame her though she may have felt like I was a burden more than a boyfriend, She tried I was with her for 3 odd months... I should shut up now I reckon we will all find someone.


Ah, get how you mean. I think there is a certain amount of social status thing with women, I've had a woman dissapear mysteriously after they found out I had only a tight knight circle of friends on facebook (10-15). So maybe that was it, or I said something they found odd, who knows. Yeah I think sometimes women see a lot of attention as being smothering or "too nice", or whatever but that's a workable issue in some ways, there's mens dating advise websites (like "askmen") that talk about that, and loads of books how to change that etc. I found some of the info out there partly useful but didn't go into the books yet. I made some useful changes but everything just takes a lot of time and application.



Ladywoofwoof
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 Mar 2013
Age: 43
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,879

01 Aug 2013, 5:55 am

Deluge1988 wrote:
My cousin has found a good solution: finding someone from the Eastern part of our world, where girls are still girls.


Wow... racist and sexist all at once.
:roll:

Maybe that's why women don't want to be with you (or girls, whichever you're after) ?



Ladywoofwoof
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 Mar 2013
Age: 43
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,879

01 Aug 2013, 6:04 am

To the OP...
I understand what you mean.

Especially when young, a lot of women can be really strange (and similarly, a lot of guys can be too) about assuming things about people based on how they look, or expecting others to be "normal" (when even experts in psychology and sociology can't manage to define "normality" because it's such an intangible thing).

I think finding a relationship partner would be much easier for many socially awkward / quirky people of both genders, if this wasn't such a peculiar planet to be on in the first place.
8)