12 Aug 2013, 1:18 pm
Hey Guys, I've just joined so I don't know much about the community of Wrong Planet yet, and I haven't set anything up, but I'm going to the doctors tomorrow for a problem that might be related to the autism spectrum, so I guess I just wanted to see if anyone who has actually been dignosed feels the same or felt the same before dignosis. If anyone could help me I would feel a lot better knowing i'm not alone in feeling this way.
[recent background] I've just started a new job with 3 other people in close contact, and I don't know if I can stay here because I just can't cope with the noise. They make constant wet noises from their mouths, the noise they make when they eat....it's horrific. I'm falling behind on my work because I have to cover my ears and I obviously can't type while doing that 
.Deep inside when I hear any mouth noise that isn't taking I just want to hurt them, I get so full of rage and it's so confusingly painful. 
The thing is, people have never really had a problem with me; as in i've never been ridiculed or treated differently, I haven't had anyone say I was acting 'weird'. I've often been that 'far more intelligent than she should be for her age' kid, I've been told that i'm aloof, shy and I that I don't really show my emotions much, or don't show them right (exaggerate, totally blank face etc.). Part of that is that I don't understand why i'm expected to interact all the time or show emotion, and the other part is that I feel 'shy' (I don't know what to do, I feel awkward). Everyone has always told me I should get the 'f' over myself and that everyone feels the way I do, but I just want to run by some traits I notice in myself:
Hatred of specific (and variety) of sounds | Mixing texture with other senses - everything has a texture either wet or dry, I hate 'wet' things, though this doesn't corrolate with actual texture (tomato soup is dry to me) | Certain foods can't touch or be eaten together, I have a system for eating different things | I loathe certain feelings on my skin - wet hair on my back, the softness of other people's skin | Sensitive to temperature | Photosensitive eyes - I have to squint in dim daylight | My sense of smell is extremely weak, but I love really bland food as flavour can be overwhelming | A bit embarrassing, but I get a euphoric feeling from spinning, especially on computer chairs even though I don't 'enjoy it' | I also like repeated movements, throwing things up and down for no reason, intertwining my hands, clapping randomly, twirling pens and hitting my knuckles with rulers | I repeat things, I like talking about the same things over and over (not obsessively, but talking aboout the same thing over a month), I like to watch the same TV episodes or films over and over, when I listen to music I have to repeat each song until I feel I've listened to it 'right' | I don't get the knowledge/skills based obsessions that Aspies often have, but I become fanatical with films, music, actors or history and I research this obsessively for as long as a month or as short as a couple of hours | I find most touch to be an invasion of my body and my 'mind' if that makes sense | I feel extremely uncomfortable when anyone looks at me (feels threatening), and I CAN'T make eye conact with strangers unless they're 'functional', like a shop assistant | If I don't understand something social it has no real value to me; I never expect presents so I don't see why others would want/need them | I've always taken things very literally, when I was in school (about 15 at the time) my teacher joked about wanting me to bring in a pack of Smarties for him the day after and pick out all the blue ones; I knew logically he was being sacrastic but when I saw him the day after I had this horrible feeling because I hadn't done it, and he could actually mean it.
There's so much else I could put down, but do you spot things that could be Aspie traits? Or could I just be a "normal" person with a sensitivity to a lot of things?
12 Aug 2013, 2:17 pm
TenPencePiece
Veteran
Joined: 11 Dec 2009
Age: 29
Gender: Male
Posts: 46,000
Location: Greater Manchester, United Kingdom
12 Aug 2013, 2:38 pm
Well, it sounds like you certainly have some traits in common, from what you've written I'd say it's more likely than not
Oh, and it's not just another "I think I have Asperger's" thread, it's your intro thread 
12 Aug 2013, 4:22 pm
[recent background] I've just started a new job with 3 other people in close contact, and I don't know if I can stay here because I just can't cope with the noise. They make constant wet noises from their mouths, the noise they make when they eat....it's horrific. I'm falling behind on my work because I have to cover my ears and I obviously can't type while doing that
.Deep inside when I hear any mouth noise that isn't taking I just want to hurt them, I get so full of rage and it's so confusingly painful. The thing is, people have never really had a problem with me; as in i've never been ridiculed or treated differently, I haven't had anyone say I was acting 'weird'. I've often been that 'far more intelligent than she should be for her age' kid, I've been told that i'm aloof, shy and I that I don't really show my emotions much, or don't show them right (exaggerate, totally blank face etc.). Part of that is that I don't understand why i'm expected to interact all the time or show emotion, and the other part is that I feel 'shy' (I don't know what to do, I feel awkward). Everyone has always told me I should get the 'f' over myself and that everyone feels the way I do, but I just want to run by some traits I notice in myself:
Hatred of specific (and variety) of sounds | Mixing texture with other senses - everything has a texture either wet or dry, I hate 'wet' things, though this doesn't corrolate with actual texture (tomato soup is dry to me) | Certain foods can't touch or be eaten together, I have a system for eating different things | I loathe certain feelings on my skin - wet hair on my back, the softness of other people's skin | Sensitive to temperature | Photosensitive eyes - I have to squint in dim daylight | My sense of smell is extremely weak, but I love really bland food as flavour can be overwhelming | A bit embarrassing, but I get a euphoric feeling from spinning, especially on computer chairs even though I don't 'enjoy it' | I also like repeated movements, throwing things up and down for no reason, intertwining my hands, clapping randomly, twirling pens and hitting my knuckles with rulers | I repeat things, I like talking about the same things over and over (not obsessively, but talking aboout the same thing over a month), I like to watch the same TV episodes or films over and over, when I listen to music I have to repeat each song until I feel I've listened to it 'right' | I don't get the knowledge/skills based obsessions that Aspies often have, but I become fanatical with films, music, actors or history and I research this obsessively for as long as a month or as short as a couple of hours | I find most touch to be an invasion of my body and my 'mind' if that makes sense | I feel extremely uncomfortable when anyone looks at me (feels threatening), and I CAN'T make eye conact with strangers unless they're 'functional', like a shop assistant | If I don't understand something social it has no real value to me; I never expect presents so I don't see why others would want/need them | I've always taken things very literally, when I was in school (about 15 at the time) my teacher joked about wanting me to bring in a pack of Smarties for him the day after and pick out all the blue ones; I knew logically he was being sacrastic but when I saw him the day after I had this horrible feeling because I hadn't done it, and he could actually mean it.
There's so much else I could put down, but do you spot things that could be Aspie traits? Or could I just be a "normal" person with a sensitivity to a lot of things?
Obviously a lot of symptoms, and my gut feeling is yes ASD (Asperger's technically doesn't exist anymore since DSM5).
That said it is a spectrum, and also none of us here are therapists or psychologists, and even if we were, you can't do an online diagnosis.
I can relate on a lot of things you said, and can't on some others, for example I have a very strong sense of smell and taste, but I don't obsess about textures. ASD seems to have a sensory different profile, in that ASD seem to perceive our senses differently, some more strongly some less so, and some we just hone in one against our own wishes, like annoying sounds, bright of flashing lights, or whatever.
One thing to look out for though is your emotions.
I had pretty much self diagnosed a few years before my formal diagnosis; which was only four weeks ago.
Even though I felt I had known for all that time, and I had worked hard to find a psychologist that would confirm my self diagnosis, take me seriously, and help me deal with it, I had a shocking bout of depression once the diagnosis came.
So do as much self care as you can, and make sure you have supportive caring people around you.
Knowing you have a condition is one thing. Having it confirmed by a professional, and having a label for the rest of your life is another, and is something that is not so easy to adapt to.
Aspie hugs.
AnonymousAnonymous
Veteran
Joined: 23 Nov 2006
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 72,078
Location: Portland, Oregon
12 Aug 2013, 4:58 pm
| Similar Topics | |
|---|---|
| The Dissapearing Thread. |
28 Aug 2024, 7:20 pm |
| Observed manipulative strategy thread? |
09 Nov 2024, 12:30 pm |
