feeling weird, can anyone help?

Post Reply New Topic

I keep having mood swings that switch between feeling apathetic to wanting to hurt myself and briefly I had a thought of hurting my mom. Then I start feeling like crying and punching holes in the walls, and I'm not a violent person so I don't know where this is coming from. Does anyone have any advice?

I don't know if it's true, but I've heard that exercising and punching pillows are great ways to relieve tension and get your angst out of your system. That's obviously preferable than hurting someone then going to jail for it.

What is your living situation like? Anything causing you a lot of stress?

I have violent thoughts about hurting people too but then I hate myself for thinking such things. I know I'll harm myself before I harm other people and I've held off on self-harm for this long.

Taking it out on objects is much better than people or other living creatures.

But to answer the question for myself is that when I feel a lot of pressure from people who can't see how much they are hurting me, those thoughts would surface. I do have PTSD and see myself doing that to would be bullies or muggers or murderers or whatever I think some people on the street could be.

i have cut myself on and off for a few years. scary stuff. for the first time i had to go to the hospital for it a couple weeks ago and get stitches in my arm. i never ever would want to hurt someone else, i just feel so much hate toward the way that i am sometimes that i feel like i deserve to be hurt. it's weird, too. exercise is supposed to relieve stress, but that is only after it has seized, i think. (your heart rate returns to normal and you are in a state of recovery, so to speak) while the natural opiates are flooding your system, you can relax on the couch or other comfortable space
example: i have restarted my habit of running, and i was on the treadmill two days ago and started screaming while i was running because i wasn't fast/strong enough. i fell down and hurt my knee (the display numbers like calories burned, distance, pace, and time really get to me....) so it's almost as if i feel like my amygdala is more active when i am running? the littlest things are setting me off lately and i don't like it.
i do suggest punching pillows---feels great! going to a place where you can scream and not get in trouble also is good.

Can you identify anything that could be causing you distress in your life at the moment? Is there something you can do to reduce its effect on you or otherwise reduce the stress it is causing you?