I am not funny

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I don't know why I even bother trying to relate to people.

NT people joke around with each other and make small talk. I know that should try to be normal and join in. But when I say something, the smiling and laughing stops and they look at me as if I just barged in an farted loudly, which I didn't. What the hell?

I give up then! I would rather just walk around in my own little world. I like that. Fine. But when I try to visit their stupid world and just say something, I feel like I get negative reactions. Honestly, I am not acting weird, I don't think.

It's exhausting. A trip to the grocery store is exhausting. Oh no. I have to talk to the cashier crap. I'm gonna say something wrong.

And when I'm just walking around, all in my thoughts, in my bubble, people say, "Are you okay? You Look upset." And I say, "I'm fine." And they always say, "You look so angry. What's wrong."

I am just thinking.

A friend said that she saw me walking down the street and I looked like I was contemplating the fate of the universe. Well, I was. So?

People are irritating. So maddening.

And, I have a friend who is lonely or something and thinks of stupid reasons to be in my space. "I have a migraine," I say. "I'll come over and make you some soup," he says. No, lonely freak. I want to be alone.

So, I'm sick of it. If I didn't have kids I think I'd be nocturnal to avoid people.

Thanks for letting me vent.

No problem. I'm not that funny either. I understand your sitiuation.

My kid is having problems at school one of the teachers asked about her friends and my kid said she hasn't got any friends where we live the teacher said that my kid must be a horrible person then.
I think the teacher must have zero knowledge and have a brain of an ape lol

my kid draws and scans them onto the computer her interest is art thats whats important to her she has one friend at school who is AS so i don't see the problem.

Oh, itsangel, isn't it sickening when they focus on your kid not having friends? As though your kid has commited some crime?

I have 2 kids. One has Oppositional Defiance Disorder. Not so great for making friends. The other, I am certain, is an aspie. I am in the process of getting her evaluated.

The aspie is an angel. She's a wonderful kid. She just doesn't relate that well to people. I didn't either when I was a kid. That's no crime.

But when I meet with her school they always act as though it's some tragedy that my daughter only has one friend, and that friend is a year younger. So what? She needs her space.

I have a CARE meeting next week to figure out ways to make it better for my aspie daughter. It gets on my very last nerve to go do this because the principal interrupts me constantly and finishes my sentences. He's such a jerk. He once told me that there is no such thing as a learning disability, some kids are just lazy. GRRRRRRRRR.

A lot of people have told me that i'm not funny, and a lot of people have told me that I am.

I got the opposite problem, I say something serious and everybody laughs!
That is annoying and rather confusing.

I have the opposite problem as well. I think it's because I have NO EXPRESSION AT ALL in my voice, and people think I have 'dark humour'. People also tell me I'm witty. I wasn't trying to be funny.

I get that same problem; people thinking that I'm joking when I'm not, and thinking that I'm serious when joking. There ought to be a book of rules!

Everybody at my high school says my sense of humor is corney and random. People roll their eyes at my jokes. Humor is like a foreign language to me.

I see all sorts of stuff as riotously humorous. I recieved my family's "joke gene". trouble is that I am also deceicedly offbeat - part of the AS territory I would suppose, and a lot of my jokes go over poorly.

Larger issue.
I went through so much of my life thinking to myself that I must be missing some back channel of human communication. There simply must be something going on here that I am not part of. I was both right and wrong in this belief. i was right in that i was missing (and still do miss) a commo channel, I was entirely wrong in my assessment of its being the back channel.

This "back channel" is emotion. I do not correctly (I get it but weakly and with many errors of undrstanding), receive emotion. But then neither do i consistantly ID my own emotions, and I must admit to being poor at dealing with my own internal emotions - I have them - but they are out of my primary area of operations and so a constant trouble. I think I send improper emotional ques as well.

In these areas i think that I am fairly typical AS. The problem is that what I get out of a conversation is the logical data flow. Most around me (all of them actually, I know no other AS) are communicating emotionally, and I think we ought consider that the things titled "feelings" are even deeper within than emotions (feeling: pain, emotion: sorrow), and that we get those poorly as well.

Most NT conversation then is in communication bands that we do not get. Bands in which not only do we not get good reception, but in which we also transmit poorly and indeed rarely have much to say.

That is to say that when a room opf NTs are speaking weather or sports or each other's children, the actual logical content is very low. The non logical (no! it is not illogical - it is outside logic's realm) content is high. for the most part we stand agape wondering why anyone would bother with this talk. To them, immersed in a sea of emotion, this talk is rewarding. to us it is empty.

The Apie must learn to deal with this sort of conversation because the Aspie must live in a world in which the majority speaks in non logical ways.

I have oft wondered why I can do a job so well, and yet someone else always gets the attention. it is because EVEN ON THE JOB, WHERE LOGIC SHOULD BE IMPORTANT, the real issue is to make the boss happy. I have had one way to do that: competence. NTs have multiple ways, and they can outmanuever me.

Try to fit in. Never lose yourself though. Emulate. Good luck!

I've had it ALL!

1. People say I have a good sense of humor.
2. People say I have NO sense of humor.
3. People won't talk to me when I answer the phone because they say they think I am an answering machine! Does THIS mean they think I have a monotone voice?
4. One person recently told me I have a singsong voice! INCREDIBLE.

BTW I often see meanings differently from others. They can be serious, and I can see it as a joke. They can say a joke, and I could take it seriously or in some way they never considered.

BTW itsangel,

Your sons teacher is an IDIOT! Let your son know that, and try to get him out of there.

Steve

BeadsInMyToes, you wrote:
"And when I'm just walking around, all in my thoughts, in my bubble, people say, "Are you okay? You Look upset." And I say, "I'm fine." And they always say, "You look so angry. What's wrong."

ARGH! I hate that! I also get, "You should smile more." Oh, really? And for what reason...? Seriously, people expect you to have a freaking Ronald McDonald grin 24/7 or else they think you're suicidal -- or worse, not interested in them. Which I'm not, for the most part, truth be told.

I'm the type of person who laughs at things others don't find humorous, and doesn't laugh at things that are apparently a laugh-riot to the majority. I've been known to laugh during supposedly serious cinematic moments at the theater, which, I'm sure, irritates the people sitting next to me. I even (quietly) laughed during my dad's funeral when the minister was droning on and on about godly stuff that I *knew* my agnostic father would think was asinine, dramatic organ music booming and all that. I laugh at my own quips while those around me look on in bewilderment. Screw 'em, I say.

The only person who can make me laugh really, really hard is my brother, and he's an Aspie. Also, my kids. Oh, and Conan O'Brien.

Just be yourself, and don't worry about the clueless, boring wonders out there.