How do you show affection?

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was just thinking about this, i don't usually verbally show my affection really. strangely enough when it comes to my parents leaning on them and sniffing them is a way of showing affection, i know that sounds really strange. which a particular friend i kick her shoe when we are standing still, this is partly because i don't like standing still but also because i feel very comfortable with her to be able to do that so its showing affection. i also do call a particular friend my favorite person.

how do you show affection if you do?

I show affection by being around someone. Seriously, if I choose to be in a room with you it means I like hanging out and I value our relationship. But that's as far as it goes, all that cuddling and hugging crap weirds me out. Sadly this is impossible for NTs to understand. Lack of physical touch on my part in no way means that I don't care for a person. I wish I could get that across.

If I say "yes I'll get together with you", that means I like you and that's the easiest way to show someone I like them. I also tell my friends once in a while, "I'm really happy we are friends" that usually makes my friends go "awww, me too". Otherwise, I don't hug my friends or family members. I tell my parents "I love you". And another thing I forgot to mention is I also compliment people as my way of showing affection. That's actually the most common thing I do. For example, the other day I reached out to a friend and said "New Years Eve isn't the same without you. You always knew how to make me have a good time". That made my friend very happy to hear. Hugging isn't as good as complimenting, in my opinion!

Usually by touching them. Sometimes I stick my finger in their mouth when they yawn. They hate it and I find it amusing.

I'm usually fair, especially with friends. I may give them the bigger piece of the pizza, etc. Sometimes I bring them a treat and bluntly say "eat".

by giving them a hug

There are lot of ways to show it.

hugs :yay:

I don't show much affection using traditional means. I don't verbalize it, really, and I'm not much of a hugger. I have one family member who when I see her, I'll play with her ponytail or just act silly with her.

I might buy you something or do something for you, too.


I do this sort of thing too. "Here. Take."

Yes, physical contact can be one way to show affection.

I might draw them a picture of their cat or dog or something else I know they like.

In all the more "normal," ways.

Saying "I love you," when I do and I mean it. Hugs. Cuddles. Kisses. Facial expressions/eye contact/body language. Saying, or writing, affectionate things. Gifts when appropriate, ie Birthdays/Christmas - and not just run of the mill here's my friend's present gifts, but very thoughtful, pleasing, gifts that obviously indicate I care for the person.

Tailoring each display of affection to each individual and how they're feeling at the moment is pretty important. I show affection for my God daughter a lot differently than I do for my crush.

I come from a culture where hugs are not common, except between lovers or relatives. I am therefore not comfortable with hugs except with my girlfriend, but I don't know if it is an aspie thing, a cultural bias, or a mix of both.

I am very awkward at giving non-verbal signs of affection, but I found out that a way to make up for this is just to tell people what you think of it. NT people are so used to showing affection through nonverbal and implicit signals that if you bluntly tell someone that you like him and care for him, more often than not he will just be happy, even if it is a bit awkward. The thing is that since NT people always assume there is some kind of hidden meaning (sexual or whatever) behind any such assertion, you have to phrase it very carefully, in a way that makes it completely crystal-clear that you mean exactly what you are saying and nothing else, even if it is a bit convoluted.

I do things for them or try to solve their problems, or give them things. Sometimes if I remember, I tell them that I like them.

LOL!! I do that too. I thought I was the only one who did that!

Sometimes I like to give hugs and kisses. Sometimes I write things for people or give them little gifts as well or make things for them. Sometimes I will lean on people too or put my head on them.

In my teens I kicked girl's shoes too when I liked them. I was like my way of flirting and no one ever really picked up on it.
As a child I didn't show affection. My parents had to remind me / tell me to hug relatives and direct family members. I have also had terrible sensory issues with my skin all of my life so that doesn't really help the situation.
As an adult I only really show any kind of affection towards my Life Partner and over the years that has been one great big learning process for her. Thankfully she is very understanding. I can tell her I love her and I do but I never have small talk or any talk about feelings. I just don't like conversing unless its to explain something or relay information. Over the years I have gotten to the point where I can hug her in bed if there is a blanket between us. If there isn't I tell her that her skin burns me and honestly it does feel like that. Weird I know but that's just how it is.

Edit: I give things or make things for people as a way to show affection as well. Almost forgot about that one.