Help. If you can spare five minutes just, help me

Post Reply New Topic

I hate having to make long posts but some much stuff has hit the fan in the past 12 hours that I can't sort out anymore. Once again I will list it in a numbered list for ease of reading but I don't think that will make much difference

1. Messed up my one chance at a relationship. (See the post in members only forum and in love and dating by myself for back story). Today, I send C an email after having a conversation about communication and, because emotions were running high on my point, I put the three words as the closing line, even though I knew she wasn't a fan of that sort of affection. Now, from body language I noticed at a distance, she has become very closed when she sees me. We haven't spoken yet and, because if this, it is the one vain hope that I am clinging to to try and keep myself from, for the first time in a while, actually giving up and most of my dreams and aspirations in life.

2. Lost another friend. One of my closest friends, who was giving me some support for the above and for other stuff that was going on, has now decided that, because I relied on him too much for support when I hit my lows, that he won't support me anywhere near as much and has completely left me drifting in a turbulent sea. The only people left to turn to are the school SENCO but, because they have other people to attend to as well as me, they can't always give me the support I need to get through stuff like this.

I, in the state I am now, would like whoever reads this to help me get through this. I know I can't do it alone without failing my A Levels and I don't want the embarrassment of having to retake them while the rest of my friends just sail on through and finish them. I want to make it out the other side of this as I am a fighter at heart but, in too many cases, a fighter can be brought low by something hitting him right in the weakest point and this has hit me right, dead centre in it. I don't know if any of you have a faith or belief on here (I'm an Elim Christian) and, if you do, please pray for me.

I thank anyone who spends time to read this. There are far better things that people could be doing than reading about my problems and my lows as, IMHO, sometimes I don't think I deserve the help I get.

SRT

Feel for you.

Relationships at all levels can be harsh.

I don't know what will help you right now but I would advise getting some sleep/rest from your problems if you can. They may be more clear afterwards. And try not to guess what other people are feeling or thinking. It is the cause of about 80% of my issues with other people. You may or may not be similar but now is not the time to be allowing yourself to get wound up by others. Easy for me to say, I know, but I did and practically failed my A Levels. If you can use them as a distraction from the other stuff it may help. You will get a chance at a relationship again, I guarantee that. Especially if you are planning on going to university.

(And speak to the girl to clarify the position - you do deserve to be told one way or the other and not left to guess from distant body language - apologies if this is not relevant as I am just going on what I am reading in this post.)

Just to give whoever is following this an update, I have repaired things with the friend that was supporting me. However, I have had the news I was dreading. C not only doesn't want a relationship anymore between us, but has said to me that she doesn't want me around her anymore (people that have said that to them will know what it feels like, especially when you know you made a mistake and there was nothing you could do.

SRT

going off what i read above, and speaking from my own experience, it sounds like you need to learn to handle things on your own. friends are there for your support but not there to hold your hand through every inch of misery you might find yourself in. they've got their own stuff to deal with. ive made the mistake of thinking otherwise and eventually when i looked around for my friends, i realized i didnt have any. dont take advantage of someone willing to listen to you. as for your lady issues, you'll find another one. take the time to learn to love yourself and maybe one day you'll find a chick that fits what you're looking for. i dont know why you think it was your "one chance to be in a relationship" but stop thinking that way. it was just 1 chance you blew out of many possible chances you have (we all strike out so its cool) dont be desperate to be in a relationship.

I am so sorry for what you are going through.
One thing that helps me when I feel like that is to get some exercise. Go out for a walk if nothing else. It is only a temporary fix but it helps quite a lot. I find that if I exercise every day I cope better.
It also makes it easier to sleep at night if you physically wear yourself out.

you will found your way back hopefully.