Should teachers know?

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Base info: I am turning 18 and going into my senior year at highschool. I *may* be put into Special Ed if my IEP pends soon enough to change my sched.
Question: Do you think that it is appropriate for all (12) or so of my teachers to know of my AS? The main thing that I am afraid of (that I had already seen towards the end of this previous year after my teachers were told without my knowledge) is that the teachers will treat me 'special', which personally I cannot stand. I know the teachers will be informed that I need extra test time in a seperate room becuase I get easily distracted, but will they be told why? I am really scared of this happening, becuse (unfortunately) the way some of the teachers have treated me towards the end of this school year has caused trouble over my friends and I, to the point where they come and ask me why I get this extra attention. I don't want to tell them about AS in fear that they will no longer talk to me (I live in an area that has to be 'perfect' in a sense that the 'rejects' are alone) *sigh* It is disgusting the way some other people in my school are treated, and although I try to help them I would prefer to keep my current friends and not have the teachers give me this attention. I am totally lost, what if the school tells my teachers for this coming fall? Would it even matter if they were not told?

That's a really tough call. When I was at school, I didn't know what autism, aspergers etc. was. I bumbled my way through with no friends, heaps of bullying and lots of hours clocked up in the library (safety zone). In the classroom I was lucky - I was very focused that way, so no one saw me as having a problem - just terribly stubborn, with a shocking temper. Looking back, I don't think teachers knowing or caring would have made things any better for me. Now, however I have a son who is struggling at school (he's not in his teens yet tho'), and it was the school that pointed out his troubles, but also his high IQ. We've all (teachers, councillors and myself) gone into a flurry, of trying to set the school environment to best help him - which means things like a keyboard, special lessons, the right to go storming out of a room without asking permission. At his age, though he's feeling his way - and I really don't know what the best thing to do for him is, when he hits highschool. The things you ponder on, concern me too. I have had one experience - would it have been better/different/worse had it been handled by other people??? One thing I think though, is that if you have existing friends, and they really are your friends, taking them aside and explaining any extra help you need, should be understood. Unless you get outstandingly brilliant marks as a result of help, and they think it's because you're treated differently, most friends are more likely to be supportive. The rest of the school, just has to deal with it. You can never win over everyone - if you were the most popular person, there would still be a group of people wanting to bring you for some petty reason. Good luck with everything - I feel for you.

Different people react differently to words like "Asperger's Syndrome". Even more troubling might be the fact some of your teachers may have bias against it or some residual stigma may be attached to you if they have false beliefs pertaining to what autism is all about. But, if you know them well already, you can assess this for yourself.

You know, your real friends will always be with you if you tell them about AS gracefully. I know my friends are still with me, and I'm thankful for that. I was not judged unfairly. The fakes will root themselves out and no longer play a part in your life, and talking about AS may give your friends an opportunity to share something similarly personal about themselves... and you can connect on a deeper level as you continue to grow. Any "popularity phase" in high school is quite transient, and soon comes to fade after graduation.

There are pluses and minuses to you revealing this out in your school, but more pluses

Think about what will happen in the long term.

Best of hope

Thanks both. Today: I am in summer school for a subject that I failed, and the teacher that knows I have AS and does treat me 'special' (and it is TOO obvious, I hate it!). After being both questioned and tormented by some other students in my class, I just walked out after cussing them out under my breath. Well, during the break from class one of the kids threw a punch at me in the hallway. What next comes from AS vs. peers in school? So sick of this, I hate it were I live.

They should only know if you feel comfortable with them knowing. teachers who know absolutley nothing about it will, treat you differently. if you don't want all 12 of your teachers treating you differently and have the other students notice and make fun of you for this, then i suggest that you don't tell them! but its up to you.
i do hate to have to tell you this, but your peers will be like that no matter were you live.

I was diagosed with Asperger's Syndrome in late 1998 and graduated in June of 1996; so needless to say, I all through school myself, my parents, siblings, teachers and classmates certainly knew I was different, very quiet (got more talkative in later years, but still didn't feel comfortable saying much).

My parents saw an article about AS in a NewsWeek (I believe it was in 1997) magazinie at a doctor's office. After they both read the article they were pretty sure what they read described me well.

I was evaluated at a vocational (work) rehabilation center in southeastern Massachusetts, [where I lived] by a psyhologist I only saw once. I went to this center once a week to help the counselors help those that needed jobs work. I basically was going for the same reason, but that wasn't my intent with work's social situations being an issue for me and "my AS."

What a question! I often wonder myself. HS is coming up for me, and I know for sure all my teachers will know. But first: in elem school, I had no dx and nobody knew anything. My 5th grade teacher voiced concerns about me socially, so I got my dx. Nobody told me my dx, I found out on my own.

In MS, I know my mom writes letters to my teachers sometimes to explain stuff. I didn't really know much in 6 grade. or 7, but in 7 I told 1 teacher. She is a spectacular teacher (SS) and was fine about it. She did some research I think. She didn't really noticeably treat me different. Just made sure I wasn't singled out in class and was lenient on grading class presentations. (One teacher cut me off a whole letter grade for a horrible presentation-no eye contact etc-I was so disappointed-since I usually hate even trying on those) Well, all the core teachers were familiar w/ the IEP. The "Explo" teachers (gym, art...) treated me as if I was ret*d.

That teacher moved up w/ me to 8 grade. There I know my teachers all were familiar w/ my IEP. (I helped w/ my IEP in 7grade and up). So they knew symptoms etc, but I dk if they knew the term AS.

HS: My teachers are all being specially trained to deal w/ me. I have a Behavior Plan (a huge joke). I'm quiet in class and never disruptive. But it makes sure I have the ability to leave class if overstimmed. I've been asked to write a letter to the staff (all my new teachers) at the HS. I'm glad, since I know transitioning to HS will be hard and no fun for me.

Summarizing, I know I prefer teachers I will spend a lot of time with know about AS. Not just know the label, know what it means. I'd rather them just understand the symptoms rather than hear the label. Only once have I regretted sharing my dx w/ someone. (a new student asked why I didn't talk, I spelled out a-u-t-i-s-m w/ letters on my shirt---she ended up using me to get out of class)

Two of my friends (JL and LM) I consider very good. JL knows my dx is AS, a form of autism. She knows a lot and is just great. She treats me like a person, also recognizing that I do have special needs (which include a non-noisy environment). LM knows what the word autism means, and she knows I went to a camp for ASD kids. I don't know if she knows about AS, but she knows I'm different. She also treats me like a person, so I'm grateful to those two and all others who recognize my oddness and still treat me as a person while granting necessary exceptions.

More...subs don't know this stuff. Poor LD kids are always missing from class and subs ask where they are. They are in a LD room, and come back, and are sometimes humiliated by not-so-nice classmates for having been counted absent etc. Subs assume I'm rude if I'm rocking or staring at a pencil (visual stim) or not answering a question in class. Once a sub ridiculed me "Why don't you just answer?" when he was barking out role call (we never do roll call, plus he was a former military person) and came to my name. I actually replied , but he didn't hear me. Over and over he called my name. Kids around me tried to help. Someone finally yelled "she's here" for me. It upset me what he said a lot, since I tried so hard to get it out, comprehensibly, and I actually switched classrooms. (It was math class, and I wasn't doing curriculum, so I just sat in the science room for that class...JL arranged it)

Anyone care to talk about HS with me? Please email me (eboresow[insert at symbol]yahoo.com), IM me (AIM: eboresow), PM me here (still eboresow), or somehow get ahold of me. I'd appreciate it! Sorry this was so long.

Elizabeth

Elizabeth, I will deff. AIM you when you are on!
Thanks,
Dani

You may be interested to know that my 55 year old husband grapples with the same question...whether to divulge his AS to his peers at work. He has decided not to do it.

First of all, as young as you are, you still own your life. If you are not feeling comfortable about divulging, then maybe your intuition is serving you well.

If we lived in a country where you could get into a well established program to help fine tune the social and cognitive abilities, that would be one thing. But, unless you live in one of those more progressive states like MA or OR, I am not at all sure you'd be well served. The average person at school is not equiped to understand it. If you do tell the teacher, make her sign a document that she is not to divulge it to any of your classmates. It's really none of their business.

My husband feels that this is a situation where those that do not like him would use it to do him in, or they would be bullies. Believe it not, at age 55, he is still dealing with bullies. On his level as a top engineer, it's disguised as "swimming with the sharks." For one thing, we are living in a world where people are so self-absorbed, they may not take time to try to relate and their thought process about it may go no further than something negative, as they would not have the maturity or time to think through all of the good things about AS. Sometimes even adults don't have the kind of maturity that imparts kindness.

You don't have to appologize to a soul for having AS! As long as you behave and don't cause problems in class, you are entitled to be there and learn in your own unique way. I would tell you to always try to improve those issues that cause difficulties. Perhaps get help with socializing, if that's an issue. If you ever hope to marry, I can tell you that you'd be well served to try to understand emotions and communication. These are matters that make up the total big picture of your future. But you must always command your right to decide for yourself. No one knows your needs better than you. Stand stongly by that.

Oh well, now I don't have a say in it any longer. I ran into my guidance councelor and all of my teachers for this year have been notified (I don't even think my parents know about this, as a matter of fact I know that thay do not). Whatever, it is my last year in this school and destine to be the worst (but I will *try* to keep a positive attitude). Also just got my schedule: I have been put into Special Ed. without anyone telling me after my 504 meeting that it would start immediately this school year!

I am a high school math teacher and honestly the only experience I have had with Asperger's/autism was from the movie Rainman... That was 10 years ago.

A few years later I was a teacher of a senior high school year 12 math diploma class and noticed a student on my register with the code word "Autistic"

My first reaction was, how is it possible for an autistic student to get beyond grade 2 math.... I didn't understand because I never needed to. She passed the course. That was my only dealings with high functioning autistic....little did I know that this would become a daily experience.

I'm now a parent with our only child age 7 just diagnosed as high functioning autistic...

Now I am seeking your help. He's bright, has a good memory academically at age 9 but socially at age 3. He is now starting to get teased because he doesn't understand how to play. why one says HI when he is greeted. I worry about loneliness in his future and how will he ever have friends.

I wonder when is the best time to start talking to him about Asperger's/autism and helping him understand why he is seeing himself as different. I wonder what is the wisest things to say to explain about his disorder and to give him hope.

I'm afraid Dizzy the problem is not with you or your AS but the lack of understanding amongst the teachers - all too often in many countries there is a failure to educate both staff and pupils about AS. If this were to happen the misconceptions and downright ignorance would start to be a thing of the past and long overdue. In view of this here in the UK a group of us are looking at setting up consultancy groups of two adults with AS, one male and one female, to go around schools, places of work and so on to talk about our AS. The project is well under way with the support of some of the UK's leading experts, and we already have four volunteer teams learning about how to deliver a talk and how to give relevant information but keep it fun. Can you imagine how hard we're finding this?

Although some of us are terrified we are determined to overcome our difficulties, we hope that by doing this it will show the other students/employees that it is wrong to single people with AS out and wrong to make assumptions about us. Until people with AS start to go out and show the world we are happy to be who we are and also proud, then the NT population will continue to speak out on our behalf and as we know they do it poorly and not nearly enough.

We also feel this supports the AS individual who is studying or working from having to constantly make excuses for themselves or protect themselves from persecution born of ignorance. It also leaves them free to concentrate on their studies or work without the additional pressure of being singled out and constantly stressed because of it.

Hold your head high, and just tell anyone who thinks they have a right to ridicule that you are who you are and if their behaviour is anything to go by glad that you're not them. Oh and if it's a teacher giving you grief tell them to spend time in the classroom revising for an exam on AS, ok it may get their backs up but at least they'll know how it feels to be put down

DAS

Well, today was the first day of school and it did not go well at all. All except one teacher (go figure: the special ed teacher) treated me all "special" and stuff. And nobody told me I had an IEP meeting next week! This should all be fine and dandy (yeah ,right).

well, if you have an IEP, i bet the teachers already know... i was one of the last people to know i had as!! ! i found out when i was 14!! ! i was def. pissed b/c i went so long w/o knowing but then it all made sense and now i'm really happy

I don't have an IEP, and I'm not in special education, so I don't know how that works...and I don't know why I'm not in there...I guess I function pretty well, so that's why. I dunno. But my mom doesn't want anyone at school knowing that I have AS because she doesn't want it on my permanent record, or something. I don't know how that works. I don't have a gifted IEP, either, though, and that makes me sad. I'm going to go to a college that has an AS program, or some type of disability program. I want to go to Marshall University because they have an AS program there.

I didn't know I had AS until I was in 10th grade. That's when I got my dx. I found out I had it when I was looking for a current event for my Health class. I was looking on Yahoo! Health, and I think I saw some link for something called Asperger's Syndrome. I read it and thought, "Hmm. That looks odd. I wonder what that is." So I clicked on it, and read it. After I was done reading it (which didn't take long at all; I have hyperlexia) I jumped up and yelled, "That's me!" And I got all excited and started pulling people around the computer to read it. So...yep. Then my mom called my insurance provider for an AS specialist, and I ended up with this psycho lady who smiles too much and freaks me out. She dxd me. I'm looking into going somewhere else, though. One of my friends has AS, too, and he told me the person he used to see. I called his practice twice, but he hasn't gotten back to me yet. Oh, well.