Why don't you smile?

Post Reply New Topic

Ever had this problem where friends, family and/or coworkers have asked you to smile more often, laugh a bit more or engage in some other pointless display of superfulous merriment when you're not necessarily unhappy, just in a nuetral mood?

All the time. They rarely tell me to smile, but I'm often asked if I'm okay. I hate, hate, hate it when people ask that. I usually give them the benefit of the doubt the first time they ask. If they ask me again I usually tell them in an angry voice that I am in fact okay.

I don't want to deal with clueless strangers asking me stupid questions, especially if I'm not okay. It's hard enough to get people to understand how I'm feeling when I'm feeling okay.

I don't want to be pressured to communicate when I'm having a panic attack. Most of my panic attacks disappear when I can sit quietly and get left alone. If I really wanted to talk to people I would.

The more incapable of communicating I am the more people want me to communicate. The lack of common sense I'm this world never ceases to amaze me.

I rarely feel like smiling. I do sometimes because it would be rude not to. I don't share the merriment of social exchange either. Actually, things that make me smile almost never have to do with a social exchange. I wish it was acceptable not to have to smile when in the company of others.

I can't think of a time this has happened to me, but I could swear it has...

I think when people do this, they fail to realize how incredibly rude they're being. It's extremely patronizing to me. I suppose I might have one of those faces that appear naturally unhappy when not smiling.

I do, however, get sick and tired of being asked if I'm alright, like DevilKisses said. Usually when people ask that:
1. I am most certainly not okay, but it's none of their business why, so I feel obligated to lie.
or
2. I was actually feeling quite fine...Until some random stranger asked me if I was alright. (It's just like how if someone accuses you of being mad when you're not, you become mad.)

I remember walking around in circles a few months ago and feeling happy, as it's a form of stimming for me, when a woman approached me and asked me if I was okay. It also scares me when people talk to me so suddenly like that. I was very annoyed.

I smile a lot but I laugh very little. I am told to laugh more but fake laughing is hard to do.

I feel like there's a neural highway that's been closed down between my brain and my mouth (or rather it was never open to begin with). When you're in a good mood but people ask you 'What's wrong?' you know something's up. I've learned to 'fake' a smile when I'm in a good mood and there's people around. Probably like an NT has to learn how to fake a smile when they're upset.

I get this quite a bit. I just don't smile. Doesn't mean I'm sad. Just means that those muscles on my face aren't being used at that particular moment.

Because I have no reason to.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3v98CPXNiSk

What many normals find amusing I do not, secondly I have bad teeth which for the longest I haven't been able to do much with because of lack of funds and medical insurance.

HE LOVES ME ANYWAY Feb., 2010, edited Aug., 2010



I have a selective smile,

Or so he says.

The truth is

I hardly smile

Though he longs to see it so much he has offered a small fortune for it.



It’s funny, but why laugh?

I’m glad to see you, but the corners of my mouth don’t upturn.

I make light of my solemnity: “This is me being ecstatic.”



Hardly smiling is my most distressing learning disability,

Worse than not being able to maneuver my car into a parking space or

Read fast or remember a shape or read a map or write legibly or

Perform a sequence of tasks in order or play tennis.



I smile for the camera, trying hard to make it look natural.

I give him the picture.

I tell him it’s the only smile he can count on from me.

He says diplomatically, “You smile. You have a selective smile.”

Because you're not worth smiling at.

I smile for these reasons:

*because if I want somebody to smile at me, I have to be prepared to smile as well-
*because studies have shown that forcing oneself to smile makes one feel better.

I try to find at least one thing per day to smile or laugh about. it seems [along with vigorous exercise] to keep the blues at bay.

I used to get that a lot, I might be concentrating on something and someone would say that to me.
All it did was make me annoyed.

I don't have this problem at all, it's just that I had a deformed jaw and had surgery and half my face is numb now. I smile all the time, but I look like I'm furious at someone. Sometimes when I'm getting my hair cut and look at myself for a long time, it's eerie and weird. I'm relaxed and happy, but I just look like i want to kill someone. I sometimes wonder if that's why people react the way they do to me.

But yeah, when I was growing up my family was always telling me to smile. I think that's also part of the problems of Autism - like so many other things, we're told to do as everyone else does, and we end up getting so confused between what we're doing, what we're supposed to be doing, what everyone else is doing, and trying to BE some thing we can't even identify - I think this screws us up more than our brain anomalies do. No wonder we're still confused way into adulthood.