quaker wrote:
Many people with 'mild' HFA can feel like they are too NT for the autistic community and too autistic for the NT community.
This 'in-between' world is hard to inhabit without the extra challenge of those more effected by autism making claims or judgments about ones autistic status or professionals not taking into account adapted skills in evaluating an individual for HFA.
I'm not diagnosed but that's almost precisely my situation. I know people that would suspect me to have Asperger's, though there are others that would instantly think otherwise.
I can relate to the OP's confusion/frustration, though not to the listed improvements. I have never been able to and still cannot hold a good conversation, even with my closest friends. I can enjoy spontaneity but the extent to which that is true is highly limited. I have however essentially eliminated all rituals, and my only major sensory issue (that I'm aware of) has improved over time.. I almost don't even consider myself to have tactile hypersensitivity anymore (I do, but no where near as bad as it was). I still am hyposensitive to pressure, as I've maintained my love of deep touch and still annoy people by squeezing them too tightly etc. I don't stim as much, nor in the same eccentric ways that I used to.
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Unapologetically, Norny.
-chronically drunk