Do you think this is true about people with aspergers?

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Jamesy
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26 Apr 2014, 6:04 pm

One guy I know with aspergers said to me "people with aspergers who are nice are so much better than the good people" and he continued "however those with aspergers who are nasty are so much worse than the bad people"



alwaysnow
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26 Apr 2014, 6:15 pm

Aspergers often works in the extremes so its probably true to some extent.



Jamesy
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26 Apr 2014, 6:17 pm

alwaysnow wrote:
Aspergers often works in the extremes so its probably true to some extent.


What can make us behave worse than thr bad people?



alwaysnow
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26 Apr 2014, 6:25 pm

Black and white thinking



ZombieBrideXD
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26 Apr 2014, 6:31 pm

i have a hard time monitoring how polite i am, sometimes i think i go overboard.


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snufkin
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26 Apr 2014, 6:41 pm

Most autistics recieve a lot of information through the senses, more than your average neutorypical. Because of the higher input there should also have to be a higher output. Therefore the behaviour of autistic individuals might often become more intense, no matter what behaviour that is.



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26 Apr 2014, 6:51 pm

I can definitely see that in my son.

He has always seemed intense. Parenting strategies aimed at lowering the intensity have never helped. The only useful thing is to help him steer the intensity in the positive direction.


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Marybird
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26 Apr 2014, 6:53 pm

There was a little girl
who had a little curl
right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good
she was very very good
but when she was bad she was horrid.


A poem my mother used to recite to me.
She said the person who wrote it must have known me.



wozeree
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26 Apr 2014, 7:28 pm

I'm reading this book, Hawaii (a novel from the late 50s). There's this character that is written so well as an Aspie - but I'm not sure how Michener did it since even today if you ask somebody what Asperger's is they are likely to get it messed up, much less back then.

This guy (Abner) is a missionary on a ship to convert the Hawaiians to Christianity. He's such a mixture of love and total screw up obsessions and rigid thinking. Parts of it are really funny and parts of it are sad (because he tries so hard, but he is so clueless). When he was going to meet the woman he was to marry (arranged marriage), his sister wrote out a note for him that said stuff like, get washed, say hello when you meet them (the kind of stuff I sometimes wish I had someone to write out for me)!

James Michener must have known an Aspie is all I can say.

But to the point of the OP -on one hand he's running around the ship taking care of all his sick fellow missionaries, but on the other hand when his wife is so seasick that she can't listen to his big sermon, all he can understand is that she screwed up his plans.

I think a lot of what you are talking about (the bad part) comes from just being unaware, but most of us learn to be more aware at least as we get older. Probably never will be like other people, but there's that aspect of how hard we try to get it right that, when others think we are just being jerks. It's like we know something is wrong, but not what is.

I wouldn't say we're nicer or meaner though - non-Aspies can be very kind or extreme jerks also.



CockneyRebel
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26 Apr 2014, 8:44 pm

I find both to be very true. I'm one of the nice ones. A real Sweet Pea. I went to college with an aspie who was one of the mean types. He called all of my colleagues except for me toilet heads and toilet seats. He also called me Queen in a very snide manner. He'd also say that if he had a puppy dog, he'd kick it. He also called my best friend at the time a fat pig. We were told to partner up and William and I were were asked to switch partners. He ended up with Bryan who was my best friend at the time and he said to everyone, "I'm not working with that fat pig!" I along with the rest of my colleagues told him that it was wrong of him to call my friend a fat pig. I also flew off the handle at him. Bryan was a blue-eyed version of Mick Avory, with a very sensitive nature.


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26 Apr 2014, 9:38 pm

Probably.



daydreamer84
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27 Apr 2014, 1:23 am

I think I'm in-between, not the best sort of person but not the worst either. I can be quite selfish and inconsiderate but I'm not evil, I don't enjoy lying, manipulating or hurting other people at all. That would be the worst sort, IMO, a psychopath who enjoyed using and hurting others. The best sort would be very kind,*genuinely caring and helpful all the time.



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27 Apr 2014, 1:30 am

Makes sense. But I suppose both behaviors could be in one person, I am extremely naive and kind hearted, but the life hasnt been always kind to me and so I turned rather evil, at times. Either way my response is usually quite raw, hate or love



TheBlueEyedAlien
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27 Apr 2014, 6:55 pm

I've always been pretty nice to people when I have to interact with them. Especially when I was in elementary school. I think I was a bit too nice, probably got walk on by people at one point or another. I still am naive and I hate that because I know people will use that to manipulate me. :(

As far as a dark side, it most definitely there. But, I never want to let that show on the outside. Aggression or vengeance are two things that do NOT need to be in my brain, because I'm worried that if catch myself in any of these mental states, it'll one hell of a fight to pull myself out of it. For instance, if I want revenge on someone, slashing their tires or spray painting their living room just doesn't get my anger through to the person who betrayed me. Hanging roadkill by their tails from the roof of their pickup truck might do it though.
I've never been in a fight before and have always avoided that kinds of conflict (for good reason) because I'm afraid that once I get violent I won't stop. I've felt the adrenaline when you hit that point of aggression and....to me it's a horrible feeling that I never want to experience again. So, aggression just needs to stay out of me. To get a picture of me in fight mode......have you ever seen a rampaging chimpanzee? That's it. I don't throw punches, I throw chairs.


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TheBlueEyedAlien
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27 Apr 2014, 7:02 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:
I find both to be very true. I'm one of the nice ones. A real Sweet Pea. I went to college with an aspie who was one of the mean types. He called all of my colleagues except for me toilet heads and toilet seats. He also called me Queen in a very snide manner. He'd also say that if he had a puppy dog, he'd kick it. He also called my best friend at the time a fat pig. We were told to partner up and William and I were were asked to switch partners. He ended up with Bryan who was my best friend at the time and he said to everyone, "I'm not working with that fat pig!" I along with the rest of my colleagues told him that it was wrong of him to call my friend a fat pig. I also flew off the handle at him. Bryan was a blue-eyed version of Mick Avory, with a very sensitive nature.


Sounds like that guy needs a swift punch in the nose. What an ass.


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27 Apr 2014, 7:04 pm

I get told a lot that I am intense. And people who say that I am nice say that I am wonderfully nice. But when I do something mean people have told me that I am vicious. So I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that our levels of intensity are higher and that we are constantly in that mode of 11. (reference from one of my favorite scenes from the mockumentary "This Is Spinal Tap")


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