Don't believe the lies

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On so many autism forums, there are so many people suffering from the lies told by the mainstream. Habitual belief that our cognitive style makes us bad, and that our behavioral coping mechanisms make us bad causes or intensifies depression and other negative mental states.

So many of us are 'identified with a disability' and removed to marginalized classrooms that intensifies a self-concept of brokenness that leads to learned helplessness. This is wrong. But we will move closer to righting this abomination if we reject the lies told by teachers, peers, and even our families.

Some of the things we can do is to read empowering threads and literature. We need to develop self reflection so we can act from our strengths and learn to accommodate our weaker skills.

Autism is not about behavior, which is how we are tagged by the current, entrenched thinking of the APA (American psych association), but a powerful cognitive style. It is devalued through the ignorance of the "experts*, but it is the source of all major contributions to human culture.

Read biographies of the world's greatest thinkers, and you will be reading about autistics. You will be proud to be part of this amazing group of diverse people characterized by being 'out of the box' thinkers with the narrow interest needed to pursue their ideas obsessively.

We can learn how to harness our minds, how to understand unconscious thoughts, how to work the placebo effect to empower us. Most of the autistics that contributed so powerfully to human culture were home schooled, so we're not subjected to lies of incompetence and rejection. Most of us first have to see the lies for what they are so were can exorcize these demons. Do it! Then be who you were born to be.

I think half the problem is people suddenly flicking a switch when 'autism' is mentioned. It goes from "normal kid, maybe a bit weird" to "special kid", as if the diagnosis somehow changes their opinion. Luckily this is far better then it used to be, but it's still a problem.

The problem is, though, that the opposite can be nearly as destructive. I remember the stress and work I put into maths because I had to live up to the expectations unreasonably placed on me. "He's an AS kid, clearly he has to be some kind of mathematical genius." When I was diagnosed I even got moved to the 'special kids' English and into 'advanced mathematics'...

It's a fact that there's significant disadvantages that make a big impact. They're the little things people don't even notice, yet we can't even replicate with a computer. Not being able to maintain eye contact or understand how long you have to hold it for has fairly big impacts, to be honest. Minimizing the importance of these issues shouldn't be acceptable. Lots of us are missing the fundamentals needed to effectively function in society, it shouldn't be ignored, it should be helped. I was fortunate enough to have been diagnosed at a time where there was significant improvements in the sector, where the professionals were actually professionals. (before then half the 'professionals' didn't even know what AS was, let alone how to HELP)

Fortunately, Australia seems to be well on the way to getting past many of the hurdles. It's seen a lot of progresses in the field and a lot of actually helpful professionals are paid by the government to help kids. Yet I think the support for adults here is frankly nonexistent. It's as if the government thinks you suddenly become fine once you grow up. As if it's some kind of faze for kids (I literally had to get re-tested to make sure I still had it, too. Incase I just miraculously got cured by growing up.) When I asked the government I basically got told I had to be normal or go on disability...



In conclusion: I think the hype train of "lots of great minds were autistic too" does about as much harm as it does good. I think people jump on the bandwagon too often, at times. I for one am sick of people thinking I must be a mathematician...

Because I did well in the science fair in 6th grade (age 12) and 8th grade (age 14), my parents kind of viewed me as the hero of the family. But it's like two sides of a coin---it's a trap. Later on, they viewed me as the scapegoat of the family.

I wish I would have had the maturity to say, I'm just a regular guy. But, I think for me to have pulled this off I probably would have read three different autobiographies in which the person was talking about this.

Indeed. I sometimes amuse myself by wondering how things would be if the majority of the population were on the Autistic Spectrum (and thus 'normal' by virtue of being the most numerous). We would then have 'special' classes teaching NT's how to behave more Aspie friendly - or 'socially acceptably' in light of this opposite bias?

I think that so many of our 'issues' are not as a direct result of the way we function, but of how society reacts to that. Unrealistic expectations - from expecting a genius to simply expecting us to 'just deal with it' - are the root cause of so many problems, in my view.

The best analogy I can think of is reflected in the name of this forum, Wrong Planet. It is a cultural thing, more than any kind of 'disorder'. Yes, we are aliens in this culture and the onus is therefore primarily on us to make as much effort as we are able to bridge the communication gap. However, the host culture also needs to learn that we are not speaking our 'native language' most of the time. It would therefore benefit the Aspie community if the NTs could seek to understand - and make allowances for - how hard it can be for us to get by in this often bizarre and confusing culture of theirs. That would be closer to the ideal scenario but, sadly, we don't live in an ideal world.

In the meantime, as you say, don't believe the lies.

I totally think you are so right, Dithra. In fact that's my foster son's job -I am proud to say

He works at a full inoculation school. He works with teachers and peers to help them learn how to understand and support kids who are struggling. He helps them meet sensory needs, exercise breaks, noise lights, communication, whatever so everyone can learn together and come to respect each other. I used to work at that school too. It was really great.

One of the long term benefits of thoughtful full inclusion is that when these kids grow up and get jobs, they are working with people who accept difference and respect that supporting special needs results in better performance. They do this naturally. And everyone has special needs.

This could become the norm.