aspergers and introversion: HOW MUCH alone time do you need?

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I have mild aspergers and am a solid introvert. I value alone time, look at social interactions as commonly draining, etc.

I'm struggling with identifying just how much alone time/solitude is healthy, so I'm curious to ask this question of the community:

How much alone time do you feel is good for you? If you're in a relationship, how do you explain this to your partner? Are you able to get your solitude/alone time if someone (roomate, partner, parent, whatever) is in the house with you?

Anything you'd like to offer would be helpful.

I think I'd like a few hours a day of solitude but I certainly don't get it. At the moment I get only a few hours a week of guaranteed time alone and it's not enough.

I work in an open plan office and commute to and from work on crowded trains. I desperately need some time regularly where I am not being looked at and judged. I also need a bit of privacy just to sort out things like my finances without someone looking over my shoulder, I don't get it.

I share my flat with my mum and she doesn't like me even being in another room- she sees it as neglecting her. She doesn't know I have Autism but she knows I am an introvert and need "quiet time" but she tends to manipulate this and understands it as I need time away from everyone except her.

My girlfriend knows I have Autism and need time alone but I she wants to spend as much time as she can with me (which is very flattering) and I think she is a bit upset when I say I want time alone - she also sees it as a rejection of her (which it isn't).

When I lived at home, I thought I needed much more alone time. Now that I'm in a self-imposed exile I know I need much less.

I find people to be a drain unless im dealing with 1 person I share alot in common with or there is distance between us i.e phone or internet

I used to write things in a notebook and one of the things I wrote was:
"I like [partner's] company when she's here but I can't wait for her to go to work because I prefer to be on my own!"

Unfortunately, she found it but didn't say anything until many years later after I was diagnosed. She told me that when she first found it, she was very hurt but after finding out that I had Asperger's (and what that entails), she understood.

I far prefer my own company. I find having to mix with people very draining and need to be alone to recharge. I don't know if it's unhealthy or not but I don't care. That's just the way I am!

I don't mind a cat's company though. After all, 'All Cats Have Aspergers' - Did you know?

I need a lot of alone time, as I find interaction draining. But...the exception is if or when I've been lucky enough to meet a new person with whom I "click". It happens rarely, but if I do have someone come into my life who happens to put me at my ease, has things in common with me, shares a similar outlook on important factors, I start to feel comfortable enough around that person that somehow it isn't a strain at all to spend lots of time with them.

But that happens rarely, and it always seems like there's only room in my life, and in my energy, for ONE person like that to be allowed that much time and closeness.

With everyone else, I'm not completely at ease and so socializing is exhausting. I need TONS of time alone. In fact, when I took two weeks off work over the Christmas and New Years holidays, and I barely spoke to a soul and stayed at home almost all of that time, I was in bliss. My anxiety in general decreased, I felt more and more calm and happy the longer my break went on, I started to become more productive, finally getting around to projects ranging from the mundane -- getting my place cleaned up and tidied somewhat -- to creative: doing something with my photography and finally organizing my picture files and backing them up.

Everything in my life feels filled with more "radio interference white noise" when I'm around people too much. I've noticed that strongly my entire life, and always called it that.

When I can get away from work, get away from people I don't choose to have bugging me, I blossom in every way imaginable.

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Just curious, when you use the word ?alone time?, are you referring to time when you are not conversing with others? Or, when you are in the solitude of your own room?

As an example, every weekend, I go to the store by myself wandering through the aisles. I don?t speak with anyone. I simply navigate the aisles with my shopping cart. And think. Similarly, every weekend, I do yard work by myself. I don?t speak with anyone. I simply navigate the lawn with my lawnmower. And think. I am alone in both situations. Even though, in the first situation, I am surrounded by people. They are simply objects to be navigated around. No different than when I mow the lawn (as I need to navigate around a tree or rock).

As a note, my favorite activities involve simply thinking. And, it is hard to do, when I am expected to converse with others. Yet, in my above example, I can think when others are around. As long as I can ?block them out?.

Don't like being out of my house for long periods of time. Traveling can be brutal. Being around people constantly, being outside, not being home unobserved... too many concurrent calculations prolonged.

For me, it depends on the people I am around. For example, my partner, when she is home, makes me feel like I am not getting "alone" time because she will frequently (couple of times an hour) try to involve me in her world or come "check" on me, etc.; she is an extrovert and needs that frequent energy from me. So, just not conversing is not enough in that situation - I truly want to be in a place where she is not.

Your other examples (shopping in a store, doing yard work) work for me as well - I agree, both of them can be good "alone" time. I used to enjoy doing my grocery shopping at a local 24 hour megastore in the middle of the night because very few people were there.

Sometimes I do want the complete solitude (home alone) but most of the time, being non-interactive (grocery store shopping alone) is quite sufficient.

and a follow up question for everyone who has responded so far:

can you quantify (put a number to) how much alone time you need or prefer? In a typical week or month, how much true solitude time (home alone, or in a place where NOBODY else is at) do you feel reasonable with? How much non-interactive time (such as at a library or store, where other people may be but you don't have to interact with them) is healthy for you?

I feel like I need one or two days a week of true solitude, and an hour or two a day of uninterrupted non-interactive time, and I'm trying to determine if that's an abnormal amount, or typical...

Ideally, I wouldn't want to be in contact with people for more than 3 days a week. Any more than that and it really starts tiring me out.

depends if i'm in school or not.
during the school year, actually being in school is as much (often more) non-alone time as i can accept in my day. i'm fine with nobody asking to hang out after school. weekends are best left out of the house, but by myself.
in the summer i wouldn't like to be inside all the time, but doing things, mostly by myself, but i'd like to be with someeone for a while...

as for the follow up question...if my day was 10...i'd spend about 7.3 by myself.
if i'm awake for 12 hours in a normal day, 8 or 9 is by miself, this includes true uninterrupted solitude and non-interactive time.

I think between 2 and 4 hours of complete alone time and no more than 4 hours of high interaction with other people per day would be best, the rest of the day spent half and half between low interaction and semi-alone time. Though it does depend on the people and the place

To be honest, I need no alone time.
Whether I am with people or not makes no difference for me unless they are interesting people. But most people are boring, so when I am around them I just put on my earphones and start daydreaming.
Social interaction is not and has never been exhausting to me, I just think it is kinda confusing and I can't focus on it because I can't filter the background noises. I don't get that "time alone to recharge" thing either; I drink water with sugar to recharge when I feel exhausted, not time alone. I'm not belitteling people who find social interaction exhausting here, I am just honestly saying it's something I can't understand because I have never felt it.
I used to feel lonely once, but I haven't for a long time. I don't dislike spending time alone, but neither I value it particularly.
I usually don't get bored when I am on my own, but when I do I just call a friend and we go to a place related to our interests together pr I just go to their houses (usually unannounced).

I would prefer to be alone about 23h a day with a hour of calm interacting (watching a TV movie with someone for example) but I am also fine with being all alone for longer periods of time. It happened I was left home alone for 2 weeks straight and I didn't even open the front door once. The only outside time I did was sitting alone on my house balcony while reading a book. But I was interacting with people on a forum related to my interest so it wasn't like I got no social interaction at all.

On everyday basic I tend to stay alone between noon and 3pm and I also take my time in the evenings and early night hours (10pm-2am) when my parents finally go to sleep. So I guess I am currently spending like 5-7 hours a day alone (by alone I mean home alone - I don't consider myself being alone when I can hear my parents talking/watching TV next door) but from my experience I am fine as long as I get just 2-3 hours of time alone a day - thats the minimum I need to survive.
The requirement gets bigger after a huge social interaction or a sensory overload. I need about 12h of alone time to recover to functional state (and first 5h is a must - don't come near me then or I "bite" ) but I usually want to have about 3 days "off" after that. I honestly hate weekends - I am usually forced to spend a lot of time interacting during weekends (even 18h of interacting per 24h with only a break for short sleep if I am very unlucky) so days Monday-Wednesday is often a time when I am avoiding everyone.

I need a lot of alone time. Most of my time, actually. I consider it a bad thing whenever I start becoming out of touch with what's going on.