Cross-cultural experience and the spectrum
For the longest time, I've pinned down my oddities as effects of being thrown into radically different cultural settings throughout my life. I figured I was in a constant state of cultural confusion, possibly extended culture-shock. I've observed others who've lived multi/cross cultural lifestyles, yet they seem to have adapted much better to the changes than I have. I'm curious how these two kinds of identities (being on the spectrum and being a Third Culture Kid) have bearing on continued experience. I'd love to hear anyone's insight/experience on this topic, as I'm not finding much research on it.
Because of my dad's job we moved every three to four years since I was a baby. So I have never known staying in one culture or place until I was an adult. So I don't know how it really affected me except that it was all I knew. I did not know it was possible to be born and grow up in one place since all the kids I knew moved a lot also since they were the kids of people who worked with my dad. I was in the 6th grade when I actually realized that people don't move all the time. It was a hard concept for me to grasp.
It's funny because we would visit my cousins and they never moved, but I never put the two together until I met the one kid at school. It's hard to say how I was affected because I did not know that life was not like that for everyone else. I loved moving though because it was exciting. And I did not have friends that I was attached so it was not a problem to leave them. It was really hard when we had to leave some pets behind and give them to other people if we could not take them. But because the family unit and all the furniture and belongings stayed the same that was a constant that made my environment the same no matter where we lived. But we liked exploring empty houses and sleeping on the carpet and getting to eat sandwiches for dinner while waiting for our stuff so that was always fun.
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"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."
Wreck It Ralph
BirdInFlight
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I've lived a substantial length of time in another country from that of my birth, and I found that I generally "did better" there than in my own country. Something about being in a different culture, lifestyle and even social style, even if only slightly different, can help you either tone down or even in fact be accepted for your differences, because people put it down to you being from somewhere else in the first place. I also found that the different social style there was easier to "work to a script" for than in my country of origin, and that removed quite a bit of stress from just everyday encounters like in a store.
I have lived and worked in seven different countries in Europe, Africa, Asia, and Australia/New Zealand, moving back and forth between different cultures. Just like skibum I've moved every three to five years for nearly 50 years. One of the questions I really struggle with is when people ask me where I am from.
I don't "identify" with any particular culture, and I have never felt any desire to attempt to become a "local" or "native". I experience permanent "humanity shock" rather than culture shock. I always suspected that I think and perceive differently from other people, but given all the variability in my environment, it was hard to articulate the difference. Only when I started reading about autism did I start to clearly see commonalities across all the different cultures in contrast to my individual cognitive style and behaviour.
With some luck and lots of work, I have managed to establish a family and a small business with three other cultural nomads, two of which also have significant autistic traits. I only ever seem to establish close relationships with other cultural outsiders, and I have long given up to any attempts to "fit in" locally.
For me WP has been a great discovery. It is the only online place where I feel at home. Thanks to all the wonderful posters on this forum! I don't post a lot, but I spend quite a bit reading posts, and can relate to many of the discussions. In the physical realm I feel at home and relaxed when I am close to the ocean. The animals in the ocean are my best friends, we don't need to talk. I need to get out on the water at least once a week to get away from the human social environment.
That "where are you from" question always gets me too. I usually ask people to be more specific, like do you want to know where I was born, or my nationality, or where I went to high school or something like that. I also have a global cultural identity and don't have real culture shock either. I do, however, mimic very well and within days I have the accent down or bits of the language and I can pretty much fit in like a native.
_________________
"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."
Wreck It Ralph
[quote=?skibum?] It?s hard to say how I was affected because I did not know that life was not like that for everyone. [/quote]
Yep, exactly the same here. It took me quite a bit longer to realize it, but it blew my mind once it finally sunk in. I don?t think the ?theory of mind? limitations associated with AS helped at all.
[quote=?BirdInFlight?] Something about being in a different culture, lifestyle and even social style, even if only slightly different, can help you either tone down or even in fact be accepted for your differences, because people put it down to you being from somewhere else in the first place. [/quote]
Cross cultural studies on ASD have shown that the ratio of HFA to the spectrum overall is highly variable depending on where you are. Some people hypothesize that this is due to insufficient access to diagnostic tools, lack of autism awareness, or many just falling through the cracks into extreme poverty/homelessness. Though I have no doubt that these are definitely true, I would add that what would be considered HFA in some Western countries doesn't exist in others, as there are strong social systems that allow for greater diversity of experience to exist without the need of considering it a 'disability'. At least these were my observations in 2 of the countries I lived in the longest.
@jbw, "humanity shock" is an enlightening way to put it. Also sounds like the title for an interesting book, and it sounds like you've had an interesting life. I would buy said book.
Swimming with the fishies (and their friends) used to be one of my favorite past-times. Unfortunately, I am no longer near the sea. Hopefully that will change down the road sometime.
Last edited by Spectacles on 18 Sep 2014, 2:14 am, edited 1 time in total.
Yes, I wonder why the question matters, and which details can possibly be of interest. Additionally, as soon as you mention any specific place, people automatically assume that you match all the perceived stereotypes associated with the place, and ask questions that I am in no position to answer. In particular people tend to assume that you're interested in whatever the favourite national sport is "where you come from". From my perspective team sports are amongst the most boring human activities, that is unless David Attenborough is the narrator http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/02/1 ... 18347.html.
As BirdInFlight observes, for an Aspie being perceived as a foreigner has a certain advantage, as any local social non-conformance is not immediately interpreted as intentional rudeness. But you are still identified as weird if you don't watch sports, eat food, and speak like the people from the place you claim to "come from".
Mimicking consumes significant energy and sometimes it can backfire. In some cultures there are certain thinks only proper locals are supposed to do, and it is held against you if you try to mimic them. I'm sure David Attenborough could also shed some light on this topic
![Smile :)](./images/smilies/icon_smile.gif)
In my experience such neurodiversity friendly places don't tend to be countries but rather specific communities. One of my favourite places is a small community of eccentrics from all corners of the world on the edge of mainstream society, where I have my home base. I know several such places in at least two countries.
Thanks, that's an interesting idea. I write professionally, technical material related to one of my special interests. Writing about my life in detail would not be my kind of thing, but I could imagine writing a collection of stories that might appeal to autistics.
At one time I was effectively landlocked for 5 years. Never again. I felt like a fish out of water, and at times more like a caged animal. I hope you have the chance to move back closer to the sea.
I am also a Third Culture kid. I spent my middle school years in a boarding school where everyone in my class was from a different country. Everyone was weird compared to everyone else because of the diversity and so it was a lot easier to fit in because all differences were thought to be cultural.
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