Too Much Detail
ImAnAspie
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Sometimes when I discuss a past event with someone (who usually wants to argue and dispute the facts of our incident/argument/encounter), I can beat them into the ground with facts.
I see things in still images. I get an image in my mind of the scene where and when it happened. It appears to me in a picture, like a snapshot on a camera and as soon as that image is in my mind, suddenly I can recall EVERYTHING to do with that encounter. It all comes flooding back to me - including all the boring, irrelevant details like (for example) how the weather was, what was playing on the radio, what we were wearing, where we were, the time etc. etc. and when I start to explain what was said, I always tend to include all of the irrelevant details. That's just how I remember it but it makes for a very difficult scenario to argue with.
I always tend to give way too much detail when I recall an event and find most people just want the facts - the crux of the matter but my brain doesn't work like that! I need to remember the whole picture and relate all of the (even non-rellevant) facts.
I know I'm not alone in this but why do we do that? I feel it paints a whole picture and I know (for example), what dress she was wearing when we had the conversation isn't relevant or important to the memory or issue at hand but that's just the way I need to do things.
Can anyone relate to this? Does anyone else understand what I'm saying?
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Your Aspie score: 151 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 60 of 200
Formally diagnosed in 2007.
Learn the simple joy of being satisfied with little, rather than always wanting more.
This always happen to me when I explain about a past event, a certain object, or simply discussing about a topic with someone. I am not sure why this happens to some Aspies but I guess is that it could be that our minds are wired in a way that when we recall an event it must start from the beginning till the end in order to remember everything, otherwise, you will forget a part of that memory. I don't know, this just a guess.
nerdygirl
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Location: In the land of abstractions and ideas.
I remember lots and lots of details like a picture as well.
When I met my husband, he helped me learn how to tell stories because I used to go on and on with irrelevant details. He would gently say something like, "no one cares about those details." Sometimes, if he was impatient, he would say, "Can you just please get to the point?" He loved me for who I was, and I felt safe, so I could take the correction.
Eventually, I learned what details to leave out and what not to. I think I also learned along the way what details to capture and what to ignore, whereas before I captured *everything.* Of course, as I have gotten older and there is more to keep track of in life, some of the smaller details about things get forgotten.
I learned a while back that the reason most people cannot remember things from a very young age is due to language acquisition. Before language acquisition, we only remember things in pictures because we cannot verbalize our memories. Once we acquire language, we start remembering memories in a verbal format instead of in pictures.
However, for people on the spectrum, I believe this is different. I am not a psychologist or a scientist, but it seems that we DO remember in pictures, more than the average population. This is part of what can make it hard to communicate verbally. I think *first* in pictures, then must translate that picture into words. That can explain the feel to tell *all* the details. As they say, a picture is worth one thousand words. Sometimes, I wish I could just transmit the picture in my head to someone else so that they would know what I was thinking of.
Sometimes, I have trouble even remembering the words for something simple, like a pen. I will see "pen" in my head and know that I am looking for one. But, if I am in my own cloud world and am trying to ask someone if they know where a pen is, I will say, "um...have you seen a...um....uh...you know, the thing that has ink and you write with it?" I've had this problem since childhood - otherwise, I'd be afraid of early-onset Alzheimers!
ImAnAspie
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It's different for me. It's not like I can forget any of the details. What my ex partner taught me is the same. "Nobody wants to hear the minute details" but that doesn't stop me from remembering EVERYTHING about the event.
I have been trying to recount the story without the irrelevant facts but it's hard. I know people just want the relevant stuff but I have a hard time filtering it out! To me, it's the whole picture.
It's sort of like, when my mouth is running about my Special Interest and you come to the point where you realise no one is interested but you can't help yourself. You've just got to keep talking.
_________________
Your Aspie score: 151 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 60 of 200
Formally diagnosed in 2007.
Learn the simple joy of being satisfied with little, rather than always wanting more.
I definitely give way to much detail most of the time. Last night I was talking so long on the phone with no pause that my friend actually fell asleep... he may have been asleep for as long as 20 minutes before I realized.
I also find it very hard to be concise when recounting events, because to me every detail is important. People get annoyed because it takes be so long to explain things, but I've tried and I really cannot help it. I have to put so much effort into not doing it, and then I will still do it.
I do that in my posts sometimes too, but luckily I can edit all the unimportant things out.
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ImAnAspie
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I also find it very hard to be concise when recounting events, because to me every detail is important. People get annoyed because it takes be so long to explain things, but I've tried and I really cannot help it. I have to put so much effort into not doing it, and then I will still do it.
I do that in my posts sometimes too, but luckily I can edit all the unimportant things out.
Isn't it amazing how a "condition" can make us the same in so many unusual ways and different to NTs!
_________________
Your Aspie score: 151 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 60 of 200
Formally diagnosed in 2007.
Learn the simple joy of being satisfied with little, rather than always wanting more.
Yep, one of my writing assignments were to describe your favorite room in your house which I did almost into minute detail I was listing each piece of electronic it's model number it's functionality the specs on my TV etc
My teacher always says I'm killing her with the details since I tend to go overboard with them she's only looking for a basic description.
What can I say?... It's a gift.
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"I really wish I was less of a thinking man and more of a fool not afraid of rejection." ~ Billy Joel
ImAnAspie
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Location: Erra (RA 03 45 12.5 Dec +24 28 02)
"Yep, one of my writing assignments was to describe..."
Sorry, I can't help myself. It's an Asperger/OCD thing. You'd probably understand.
_________________
Your Aspie score: 151 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 60 of 200
Formally diagnosed in 2007.
Learn the simple joy of being satisfied with little, rather than always wanting more.
Nah, I'm not like this at all. Talking stresses me out, so I want to get my point over and done with as quickly as possible. In text, I occasionally find myself hankering to go into great detail over something that happened to me, but I usually restrain myself. Conversely, I don't like listening to other people go on and on; that bores and stresses me out as well. The only times I don't mind it is when they're talking about something of interest to me (rare) or if they are funny (even rarer).
That said, my dad is almost certainly on the spectrum and he goes into mind-numbing detail about everything. And my mum's friend used to be renowned for her lengthy anecdotes, which often centred around describing the exact layout of a house she was in 50 years ago or whatever. She has a lot of Aspie traits and could be on the spectrum.
My teacher always says I'm killing her with the details since I tend to go overboard with them she's only looking for a basic description...
the problem is not knowing which details are the 'basic' ones
i'm always afraid that if i don't include everything i might leave out 'the' important bit
ImAnAspie
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Hey, it just dawned upon me, other people don't see the event in their minds like I do. Talk about ToM. I'm 47 and I've just realised this. I've never actually given it any thought.
_________________
Your Aspie score: 151 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 60 of 200
Formally diagnosed in 2007.
Learn the simple joy of being satisfied with little, rather than always wanting more.
I see things in still images. I get an image in my mind of the scene where and when it happened. It appears to me in a picture, like a snapshot on a camera and as soon as that image is in my mind, suddenly I can recall EVERYTHING to do with that encounter. It all comes flooding back to me - including all the boring, irrelevant details like (for example) how the weather was, what was playing on the radio, what we were wearing, where we were, the time etc. etc. and when I start to explain what was said, I always tend to include all of the irrelevant details. That's just how I remember it but it makes for a very difficult scenario to argue with.
...
Can anyone relate to this? Does anyone else understand what I'm saying?
Yes - it's called an eidetic memory (sometimes mislabelled as "photographic" memory). Some on the autism spectrum have it - I do. So does Sheldon Cooper on Big Bang.
I find it only occurs for situations in that the event has some personal meaning for me. Then, it gets stored like a short video I can play back in my head whenever I want, even decades later.
_________________
Diagnosed Asperger's
It's hard to convey your thoughts to another person when that person doesn't think the same way you do.
If you think in detailed mental film, then it makes sense to me that you would describe all of it -- because all of those details literally are your thoughts/literally are what you're talking about. What's important is shown in the film, that you are trying to show the other person?
For me, this kind of thing is partly a translation problem.
This is definitely a problem for me. What parts of something do people need to be told about to understand it? What do they want to know about?
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ImAnAspie
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Location: Erra (RA 03 45 12.5 Dec +24 28 02)
Same here. It's not like every moment of my life is stored. I was actually thinking about this last night.
It seems to be mostly important or serious events or at times when I get startled, worried or stressed (which is a fair bit of the time). They tend to get burned in. I don't have much control over what events it happens with but it can be even mundane stuff. I guess remembering every cup of coffee you had and every time you went to the loo would be pretty useless and take up a lot of brain power.
As an example, the other day at work, I was walking out of my building and as I did, I walked straight infront of a man and our eyes met. It startled me and I still have the snapshot of the whole scene in my mind, face and all.
It serves me fine!
_________________
Your Aspie score: 151 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 60 of 200
Formally diagnosed in 2007.
Learn the simple joy of being satisfied with little, rather than always wanting more.