Being nonverbal

Post Reply New Topic

nonverbal or losing speech because of not knowing what to say what do you do?

What do you do when your feel your mind is blank?


when you feel emotionless and like a zombie - a little dead inside.

How do you explain it?

I was non-verbal as a little kid, I can still occasionally get so stressed out or mad I lose speech for a little bit.

As a kid I remember feeling like a ghost or a sentient houseplant, sometimes I wasn't even sure I could locate "myself" in space like I was some kind of background consciousness or something. This at times was comforting.

I've always had very good verbal ability (VIQ: 134), but even I lose my words when I'm stressed or overloaded. I know what I want to say, but I can't make my mouth say the words, so I wind up making a lot of random syllabic sounds and that's about all. The only thing to do is not to force it and wait until I'm calm enough to speak again. Sensory problems also sometimes prevent me from speaking; if my system is already overloaded, or has not yet "woken up" and adjusted itself in the mornings when I wake up, feeling my own voice in my throat, hearing it in my ears, moving my tongue and mouth muscles to create speech are all sensorily overwhelming, so even though I still have the physical ability to speak, I don't, until my system has regulated itself again.

Last edited by StarTrekker on 12 Nov 2014, 6:44 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Yah - when I'm really stressed my ability to communiacte can go right out the window. In cases like that I end up <<exiting stage left>> and going to find a quiet, solitary place where I can shut-down.

When my expressive language skills disappear from overload or when I just can't find words for something (even with my expressive language skills working well), I just keep tryng to think of words to use until I get so frustrated I have to stop.

When I don't know what to say to someone as a response, I usually just don't say anything. If I'm able to, I will respond nonverbally (e.g. offering kleenex to someone who is crying, or smiling at someone who is telling me about something that makes them happy).

When I am overloaded I am unable to say anything more than "Yes", "No" and "I don't know", eventually "I am tired" or "I don't care.". My mind goes blank and I am able to maintain only very basic communication.

Sometimes I also have problem explaining other people what is on my mind because I just can translate my picture thinking to words. Its not so easy to describe some stuffs.
It is even worse with feelings. I am unable to explain how I feel. I might identify I am happy, sad or angry but anything more complex is out of my dictionary. For example there is just no word to explain how I feel when someone gives me a gift. I am happy for the gift, but sad because I think they make too much for me and angry because it makes me think I am obligated to give them something in the future. But thats not everything. There are also feelings that can't be explained as variants of happy, sad or angry. Hidden underneath and impossible to express in any way I know. I can't even understand them myself because they are related to many other feelings so I can't even see where the feeling ends.

Nonverbal until 9. One of my Aspie friends coped me out of it and she did a good job.

Same, and then it's followed by a lot of crying for me.

I went nonverbal when at home (but not in school) at age 16 for about a year (I am 64 now). My mom treated me like a child, mocking me, talking condescending baby talk at me and faulting me for everything I did. I finally figured that if everything I did and said was going to be faulted, then I was better off by not feeding the situation by speaking. So I shut up and would not speak. That REALLY made her go ballistic. I finally moved to live with my dad who was no bucket of roses either.



I complained to a shrink about this at age 19. In those days (1969) everybody was into meditation and he told me that I should feel very fortunate to achieve that kind of blank meditative state so naturally when so many other people went to such extremes to attain the same state of mind. You might say it is the opposite of the idea that "the grass is greener on the other side". These days I actively seek out that state of what I now call "Aspie Bliss", going out walking and hoping for peaceful surroundings (on a nearby college campus) with the absence of peoples' egos and other distractions (it only happens occasionally). On those wonderful occasions when it does happen, I end up with my body operating on autopilot feeling no pain at all from my overexertion as my mind goes off into wah-wah land in a totally blank state with a huge smile on my face. At those times, no NT in this world can even touch me to ruin my mood. During my mid teens, I used to do a similar thing that could probably be called auto-hypnosis, staring at a vertical post supporting the carport as I sat on the brick wall surrounding it with a totally blank mind.

Of course when your mind goes blank while you are trying to interact with people, it is another matter. At those times I can only wait and come back to that same person at another time. NTs who do not know how to communicate with an Aspie will drive us into that state by putting too much pressure on us or sending us in too many different directions at once.

Sometimes I think of what I want to say but it's like my brain got disconnected from my mouth and it won't move fast enough.

When my mind goes blank it can give me a really scary feeling. Like I'm lost in time/space and can't place where I am. Just total mental confusion.

I'm quiet. I don't talk to people very much.
Most of the time I'm withdrawn, in my own little world, but my mind is not blank and I'm not emotionless or dead inside. Those are things I don't experience.

nonverbal or losing speech because of not knowing what to say what do you do?


I use my AAC to type out words. There's two pathways I have for language and one is disturbed much more than the other. I lose verbal speaking very easily. I lose the ability to type or swipe words much slower.


What do you do when your feel your mind is blank?

I isolate myself because it means I've processed all I can for now. I need time to file all the information. I need quiet and darkness and either Bear or Pony to snuggle. I put on MST3K and watch my favorite episodes. Then I close my eyes and let the flipbook in my brain play all the images it wants to.

The flipbook is how I think my brain stores and sorts data. If I don't let the flipbook happen- I get meltdowns.


when you feel emotionless and like a zombie - a little dead inside.

If I feel emotionless- it means I'm in the middle of a shutdown and need isolation NOW. I give myself time to be alone in the dim lights with my soothing items. Then the flipbook plays.


Try not to be afraid- shutdowns don't mean you're not human. They don't mean you have lost the ability to care or have emotions. It will pass and be okay. (((love)))

I started to speak early (about 7 months). I had problems with saying "r" sound to about 5 - 6 years old. I do not remember so much literal interpretations (only two for sure, when I was about 9 - 10). My speech was "obsessively" formal when I was younger (about 11 - 15 years old). My speech may be somewhat dysprosodic, too loud or too silent, it may be to fast etc. My mother sometimes said that my voice is "like crying" when I prayed, but my voice rather do not appear to be such for me. I have troubles with synchronisation of my speech with others. I am not so good in talking. But I liked to talk about my interests.

PS. I thought that I was writing in the topic "[Poll] Language impairments?". It should be moved. I am sorry.