P.s.(though technically speaking not p.s.) I encourage you to check out my profile. I checked out yours and I noticed first that you don't seem to have much to say about yourself (from there at least). Also, I'm assuming that one of the numbers representing your age is a typo, and I'm guessing that its the 45 in your profile and not the 29 in your forum post. Not that I go around presuming to know anything about anyone based on age, but I think its a valid guide in plenty of cases.
I too am a self-diagnosed Aspy as of about two years ago, although I started suspecting it about four years ago when I heard it described on a children's program I was watching with my autistic godson. About three years ago, a doc sat down with me for less than five minutes, and diagnosed me with bi-polar manic depression. I never have too much difficulty extending the benefit of the doubt, but I'm pretty sure he was just making another drug sale, and didn't give a damn what was really going on with me. Psychologists and psychiatrists must be the only medical professionals who refuse to actually look at the organ they've been hired to treat. Damned suspicious if you ask me!
Basically, I go into all that to get around to advising you not to mention your self-diagnoses to any mental-health professionals, as I fear its a sure fire way to make sure they insist upon some other "more qualified" assessment. And I totally get it, but the fact of the matter is, we're different.
Due to those affected being manipulated, maneuvered, and mistreated, high-functioning asperger's has been among the most misdiagnosed conditions out there. But its like asperger's was invented so that humanity would have its first living example of truly objective self-analysis(at least in the case of hi-funcs like me),so as far as self-diagnoses goes, I'd say we're a valid exception to the rule.
I heard one researcher refer to us as having "the exact polar opposite of a psychopathy". I like to compare us to white blood cells; far more rare, designed with something uniquely important in mind, and born knowing where we're needed. Of course, a few years of focused mental and emotional pressure by society and family can confuse even the best of us.
I'm so happy for you to have received the gift of knowing that much better what you're made of. I know that for me, it was impossibly empowering and liberating, as all the alternative explanations for my peculiarity that were proposed were harmful, and careless. My favorite from current/former friends/acquaintances was/is "He's such a weirdo", because at least its obviously self-centered laziness on their part. My least favorite from the woman who adopted me was "I must not be hitting him often enough". The most common by a long shot has been, "He's just an @#$hole". I even had a friend try to inform me in great detail that I am a sociopath, presentation complete with an extensive print out from an encyclopedia.
Knowing that there are other's like me; knowing that my struggle is just another wave in the civil rights movement; knowing that my pride in my courage and my lack of shame for my nature all these years was/is warranted; and most of all knowing that what I have endured and what I can do, can come together to align me with the level of purpose I have always sensed about my life, makes being what I am, and being alive when and where I am, not just worth it, but the cause of deepest gratitude for my beautiful messed up life!
TTYS I HOPE!! !
05 Apr 2015, 6:29 pm
