do you find it actually harder to make friends with aspies

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I think what I'm about to ask is kind of interesting. Do you actually find it harder to make and maintain friendships with people on the spectrum compared to NTs? Recently, I'm actually finding this to be the case. Even though I find I'm more comfortable socializing with people on the spectrum being that I'm on the spectrum too, I however am recently noticing that I have been having difficulty making and keeping friendships with people on the spectrum compared to NTs. I find it takes more effort to keep in touch with people on the spectrum and I find many people often take much longer to worm up to me and often choose not to be friends with me maybe because they are afraid to open up or make friends with people in general, and it even seems some seem to make the wrong assumption of me. I have been actively involved in an asperger's group for two years, and try to make conversation and get to know everyone without trying to push myself to hard but I still haven't really made close friendships with anyone there yet. I consider myself very open minded and probably the least judgmental person out there and will pretty much be friends with anyone as long as they treat me nice. I feel like many people who I am met who are ASD in which I've made an effort to become closer and build a friendship has not been successful compared to people who I know who are pretty much NT. Do you find this to be the case with you too?

To some extent.

My best friend is an aspie but I have attempted to be friends with other aspies and thinks don't work out very well.

One aspie we only hung out outside of school 3 times.

I kept trying to ask if they would be interested in hanging out again, but to no avail...

Another friend I have right now is an aspie. I'm making an effort to try and meet outside of school sometime, but they've been busy apparently...I gave them my email, no message or contact initiated by them.

I agree. It seems even if another aspie is interested in friendship, they will do little to return the effort.

I'm sure I've done it myself a bit - a nice aspie I know at my school seems to be making the effort to at least talk to me as an acquiantance, but I payed little attention to him and only to his female friend who I had a crush on...Might see if I can return the effort....

It can be, but I've found that a lot of us usually wait for the other person to make a move.. as if they want me to initiate hanging out or communication. Personally, I'm awful at doing such things.

I find it almost impossible to make aspie friends.

I've made 3 friends with aspergers, and managed to somehow royally f*** it up and lose them all. Well two just haven't talked to me in a long time, but it's not optimistic :/ It seems keeping friends in general is my problem, making them is a whole lot easier for me than keeping them around for me. I hope it's not a reflection on me or I must be a really sucky friend :/

I think these are some pretty interesting answer so far! I look forward to reading some more.

That's the trouble with never meeting another person like you. I don't know any other queer people, nomads, autistics/aspies, or any of the hundred other minorities I find myself a part of. I have only met another autistic once, much to the amusement of our school friends of the time, as he was apparently hitting on me like a freight train with no finesse, subtlety or skill, and I was blissfully, completely oblivious.
I'd certainly be interested in friendships with other autistic people, though. I have some idea that one would have to pretend to be normal less.

For me it's the same with NTs. I find it hard to make friends with either of them. It's because I am shy and afraid of rejections.

I find rejection from another Aspie more painful than from an NT. Logically, I realize that being on the spectrum is hardly some great unifying force as we're all very different, it just stings a bit more.

It seems to greatly depend on the personality of the person, I have only met one confirmed Aspie in person, but our interests, though different, melded together in a rather formative fashion. I do agree with Noir's point regarding the fear of rejection being increased with such a relationship however, as though people across the spectrum vary widely, it does seem from personal research most high functioning autistic would most likely be able to relate to the experiences of other people on the spectrum in terms of relationships, creating an effect similar to being rejected by a guy you have known for only 6 weeks vs one from your 5th grade maths class.

Apologies for any misused terms, please inform if they were.

Maybe as I imagine a lot are probably throwing up the same barriers as I am, I know some people that seem pretty for sure on the spectrum but I don't talk about it IRL and I don't find being friends with them any easier than anyone else and maybe harder since you get less back. I'm kind of envious of some of you guys that seem so connected with a community, I've never felt it in anything.

Another difficulty that I've faced when trying to socialize with other Aspies is the vagueness of the term "higher functioning." I guess that I'm just functional, and barely. A lot of my interests are rather trivial, and while I certainly appreciate the sciences and more academic fields of interests, I certainly do not possess any innate predilection or intense passion for them. I don't seem to have "an Aspie superpower" it seems, and while it's an unfair stereotype, it's also something that Aspies still place on one another all the same. When you see yourself and others get shamed out of an ASAN support group for not being desirably Aspie, it's very eye-opening. I guess that all falls into the realm of human nature rather than being ASD-centric, but ouch.

I really don't have a problem making friends either. The thing that I have trouble with, is finding good, healthy friendships, that actually have something to offer me, other than just someone to hang out with.

There is one Aspie-ish guy at work that I know. I get along with him pretty well, but he can be pretty "clingy", and does have some anger issues. I haven't gotten too friendly with him, because I'm afraid he would follow me around everywhere, and call me a hundred times a day, wanting to hang out.

I'm paired up with 3 other "awkward" people in my arts class. I know one of them is confirmed to have AS. We get along well together, I listen to him when he tells me about computers or cars, he seems to enjoy it and I enjoy his company.

I do connect with NTs because I have learned to engage myself in their world rather than things be one sided since I don't talk about limited things anymore.

As for people on the spectrum it would be more of a sensory and misunderstanding social cues part of each other that we probably notice. I do have more friends on the spectrum than NTs though.

What I do pick up on are people on the spectrum who have an easy time making friends with neurotypicals over us which is their choice. At the same time they appear to be someone they aren't and have talked down to other people who they are supposed to understand and relate to.

On New Year's for instance I went to a party with two friends who both have AS. Another individual on the spectrum was also present. They have no problem talking down to me and ordering me around. They basically boasted about how much higher functioning they are than I am. This person must have a lot of insecurity and feel embarrassed about being one of us otherwise they wouldn't have to talk or treat people like that.

These are definitely some interesting responses keep it going.