Catholic converted brother rejects me now

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hi all,

A few years ago my brother converted to Catholicism (we were raised Methodist). I was okay with that, no big deal. I was just a little surprised because he had never been very religious up to that point. He said it was in response to his wife's sister committing suicide in their house, and he was impressed with how the priest comforted the family and got them through the crisis. He also said he wanted his three sons to be raised in a more structured, moral environment. That was all fine with me.

The trouble was, he started getting really rude to me and my wife, with whom I had been for many years. He got really nasty, lecturing her about being on disability from an auto accident as though she were a welfare cheat, telling my Mom that he did not approve of the "homosexual lifestyle," and that I should dump my wife. He was at my wedding and had gay friends as a teen, so it makes no sense to me. I've been openly gay a lot longer than he's been Catholic. His attitude is especially strange considering how wild he was as a teen, doing drugs, racking up debts, dropping out of college, and leaving messes that my parents had to clean up. I was the honor student that never got into trouble. He never apologized or tried to make amends for all the trouble he caused everyone, and I never criticized him for it because he was so sensitive about it.

One Christmas he finally blew up at me when I was having a discussion with his wife about religion (his wife was speculating on why Catholics didn't have female priests) as though I was disrespecting his faith, which was not my intention. His wife was the one who brought up the subject. He's hardly spoken to me since except to ask for a favor. I finally got tired of being treated this way, and stopped calling him. We saw him again last year and he wasn't too bad, but still didn't talk much. He still borrows lots of money from Mom, and seems to only care about any of us when he can use us for something.

I heard from my Mom that he's moving West, and I tried to call him to get together before he leaves. He doesn't even return my phone calls.

I know I'm being an idiot to keep forgiving him like this after the way he treats everybody, but I just feel heartbroken. I am generally spiritual and believe in God, but don't subscribe to any organized religion or think of God the way Christians do. I don't understand any of this. How can the brother that loved me when we were kids hate me now? How can religion do that to a person? I haven't changed, why did he?

he's a user. he'll reject anyone that doesn't suit a current purpose. you're much better off without him