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SteelMaiden
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07 Jul 2015, 11:06 am

I can recognise some faces. But what I can never recognise is attractive features. Even when there is a unanimous "yes" from everyone that someone is really attractive, I cannot see that at all. I just see brown hair, blue eyes, small nose etc.

Also I do not have the capacity to experience love. I don't know what love feels like. And I am completely asexual and have been all the time.

Does anyone else experience any, or all of this?


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starfox
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07 Jul 2015, 11:14 am

I think it's because most attractive people have similar faces.

I remember as a kid I told my mum all the other kids look the same. Lol


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tetris
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07 Jul 2015, 11:24 am

I rarely see why others think someone is attractive, often if they find someone attractive I don't. Also if I think someone is attractive they don't tend to. I also have never been sexually attracted to anyone but there are some people I think are attractive but in an aesthetically pleasing/they are quite nice to look at sort of way. I also have no clue what love is, I've never understood how people can be in love or love someone and I've never missed anyone ever, I don't understand when people say I've missed you or things like that.



iliketrees
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07 Jul 2015, 12:33 pm

Yeah, I really don't understand what "attractive" is beyond having no facial deformities. I just see people as, well, people. I have never thought "damn he is hot" or had a "celebrity crush", or any "crush" for that matter. I just don't get it. I have never felt "attraction" towards physical features.

As for love... to me it's someone as a best friend forever. Like you always want to know them and have a lot of attachment to them.

I've never felt any sexual, romantic, or aesthetic attractions to anyone (or anything) so my version of "love" would be different to someone with them. I have no desire to ever have sex, romance seems weird and I don't get it, people all look like people. I'm fairly certain I'm asexual.



DevilKisses
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07 Jul 2015, 12:43 pm

I can tell when someone is attractive, but I can't really tell if I'm sexually attracted to someone. I might be asexual, but I think I'm too sexually frustrated to be asexual. Guess I'm just not in touch with my sexuality.


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starfox
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07 Jul 2015, 12:57 pm

I'm pretty similar to you guys. I'm asexual but I can fall love and have been in love before.


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Jacoby
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07 Jul 2015, 1:22 pm

I'm a straight guy but I feel this way about other men, I can tell what a male model and total beast looks like but but the middle part I have no clue. I really have no clue where I fall myself. I imagine if I were gay then I'd probably have more of an opinion on the matter. Whether or not a woman is physically attractive is usually immediately apparent.



ToughDiamond
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07 Jul 2015, 1:25 pm

Yup. Mainstreamers seem to have a consensus on who looks good and who doesn't. More often than not, I don't agree with it. I agree that most of their "Walmartians" look pretty scary, but the mainstream idea of the perfect-looking man or woman is miles away from mine. With me, a man loses points for looking too hunky, and a woman loses points for wearing conspicuous makeup if it's of the usual mainstream style.

I think it's referred to in the Aspie-Quiz as "an alternative view of beauty."

The other thing is that I'm more geared to a person's behaviour than their outward appearance, when it comes to being attractive:



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07 Jul 2015, 5:41 pm

I am doing well if I can tell one person apart from another... other than the most basic of traits, I usually cannot tell people apart unless I know them and if I meet someone I know in another context (say meeting a coworker at Walmart) I just will not recognize them.


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07 Jul 2015, 9:57 pm

My attraction blindness is different. I can tell if someone is attractive or not. I can feel attracted to others. I just can't pick up if they are attracted to me most of the time. That is the blindness I have. Or maybe no one really was every attracted to me!



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07 Jul 2015, 10:31 pm

Looks never mattered at all to me.
I love a person because of who they are and what they mean to me. I want to recognize that they are a person and what they think of me is important and my ex knew I beat myself up about this every day.


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Edna3362
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08 Jul 2015, 4:24 am

I don't have a sense of physical attraction either. I don't have this kind of 'taste'. People kept asking me if someone's pretty/beautiful/gorgeous/sexy/handsome, I end up with a blank, if not just describing what the OP says. I never had a crush on anyone...

I can tell people apart. I can tell if someone is rather nondescript or with unusual physical features, but never tell what calls an attractive look.


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nick007
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08 Jul 2015, 11:29 pm

I'm sort of on the asexuality spectrum & I have a hard time finding people attractive but that may be somewhat related to me having a rare low vision disorder & some colorblindness. I do have the capacity to feel love thou & have a girlfriend I'm very loving with.


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09 Jul 2015, 7:56 am

SteelMaiden wrote:
I can recognise some faces. But what I can never recognise is attractive features. Even when there is a unanimous "yes" from everyone that someone is really attractive, I cannot see that at all. I just see brown hair, blue eyes, small nose etc.

Also I do not have the capacity to experience love. I don't know what love feels like. And I am completely asexual and have been all the time.
Does anyone else experience any, or all of this?


In some ways, I´m the same. I look at faces like I look at pictures. I can judge: Classic, fun type, irregular features, colors and all, - but it is the impression of, say, warmth, that can attract me - the impression of a nice person. I can surely feel friendly love for people and animals, but like you, I don´t know what it feels like to be in love, and I had to ask a friend how physical attraction feels. I´m asexual too, so I´ve never experienced that.


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