A friend with benefits admitting to have feelings for me.

Post Reply New Topic

And in an obsessive way too, I don't want a long term relationship with her.

For one, she has to return to her country soon.

For two, she is a single mom with two not-so-little toddlers, and I am not neither mentally nor financially ready for this.

Help!

Yeah, I expected that it would happen. You should tell her that it won't work.

I'm kind of shocked that you didn't expect this to happen. I've heard this occur more than once for numerous people.

It's a male version of a friendzone situation.

How would I know with this so little experience.

FaceofBoo, sir, you just usually seem more knowledgeable about these things. Knowing a lot about how society treats love and dating, social rules/expectations, etc. This has surprised the others as well as me.

Ahh, don't you know? People like us tend to rationalize everything even relationships and social rules, but when we engage in those directly, we fail to see what we rationalized from distance.

Now that you have a girlfriend, will you stop posting on WP.net?

There's no girlfriend.

There could be one.

She's going back to her country, you're remaining in yours.

Maybe talk about how you love Beirut so much, and that you're attached to it, and that if you Beirut, you won't be the same loving Boo-man.

That post made me .

I am not that attached to this place.

The whole thing is just not possible.

This happened to me. I fell pretty hard for a FWB. (Though he didn't like to call it that, he preferred the term friends.) I told him that I wanted to be more than friends. His answer was honest and kind. He said he liked me and that he enjoyed my company but that he didn't want a relationship for reasons X, Y, and Z. It stung pretty bad and things were awkward between us for awhile. Things have since smoothed over and we are still friends. Be honest with her. It will most likely be difficult for her to accept that her feelings will not be reciprocated by you but she will get over it and you can both move on. Matters of the heart are always messy, good luck.

Is she going away permanently or for a while?

For good.

Update: She also realizes it's not possible, she just wanted to take if off her chest.

Problem solved.

I'm sorry Boo. Hopefully next time it happens she will not be leaving the country.
And if it happens with a mom again, I wouldn't be so worried. If the feelings she confesses are genuine she will understand and won't force you into fatherhood.