Since NT's focus so much on body language...

Page 1 of 1 [ 12 posts ] 

hollowmoon
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 28 Feb 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 215

10 Sep 2015, 1:27 am

Subconsciously, do they find a constant lack of body language and facial expressions odd (Flat affect)? How do they perceive this?



Norny
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 31 Dec 2013
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,488

10 Sep 2015, 1:46 am

As boring and as if one is suppressing their actions for some reason.


_________________
Unapologetically, Norny. :rambo:
-chronically drunk


Kiriae
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Mar 2014
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,349
Location: Kraków, Poland

10 Sep 2015, 6:06 am

As someone offended, in bad mood, not approachable.



Sunnyboy2
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 2 May 2015
Posts: 84
Location: Maine

10 Sep 2015, 8:56 am

I present very flat, nearly at all times. And I think many NTs find it very rude if you do not engage emotionally/visually with them.

I have no real idea why, this is my normal expression. But I guess when I do try to use facial expressions and body language.. I tend to do it at the wrong times (I have been accused of smiling at some very wrong times, laughing during others.. 'having a bad mood' when things are suppose to be exciting, etc)

I can tell when customers, I work in retail, are trying to read me specifically because they tend to get very snippy and very prompt with me (like I ask for their photo id, and they toss it on the counter instead of putting it in my hand). I'm not doing anything wrong, I am enacting exactly what my job details, my job does not require me to smile or make conversation that I don't really understand with others. They came up for a service, I'm doing it for them in a timely manner. That should be enough, I am friendly in my own ways.

I still hear remarks that I need to smile to offer better customer service, I should stop looking so unapproachable and angry, etc.. My flatness carries over onto my voice, especially on the phone (the phone is so unengaging.. I greatly dislike phones). Many people will not converse with me over the phone because they can't stand it (the flatness) and the lack of consistency in my speaking pattern. It isn't intentional, sometimes my brain just goes too fast for my mouth and I need to restart what my brain was thinking, unless the question is something I've scripted for before.

I can't say I still understand why flat affect equals everything that has been said/assumed of me, I'm naturally content and generally neutral. But I just go on with how I am because I'm not interested in changing that aspect. If people don't want to understand, or if they want to be critical over flat affect, then they can go ahead.



Amandar
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

Joined: 24 Jun 2015
Age: 42
Posts: 53

10 Sep 2015, 9:11 am

My friend tends to have a flat expression. I told him once that when he raised his eyebrows at something I've said that I couldn't tell if he was intrigued or if it was the dumbest thing he'd ever heard. He said "oh, that must be fun for you." :lol:



SocOfAutism
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 2 Mar 2015
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,936

10 Sep 2015, 10:21 am

The short answer is that if you have a flat affect people will think there is something wrong with you.

It's worth it to learn little tricks here and there for standing, moving your arms and face and whatnot. It'll save you being bothered from suspicious nosy Nellies.



glebel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Jul 2015
Age: 62
Posts: 1,665
Location: Mountains of Southern California

10 Sep 2015, 10:38 am

I generally look at peoples mouths when I talk to them. This appears to be somewhat acceptable. I also try to keep my stimming down to continuously wiggling my toes.


_________________
When everyone is losing their heads except you, maybe you don't understand the situation.


Abe1
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

Joined: 18 Aug 2015
Age: 50
Posts: 62
Location: UK

10 Sep 2015, 10:51 am

The problem with me is that I have body language, but it is not subtle, so if I am annoyed, either I keep it in check, or everyone knows about it.

I can also at times pick up on body language, but this ability varies greatly.



hollowmoon
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 28 Feb 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 215

10 Sep 2015, 5:11 pm

SocOfAutism wrote:
The short answer is that if you have a flat affect people will think there is something wrong with you.

It's worth it to learn little tricks here and there for standing, moving your arms and face and whatnot. It'll save you being bothered from suspicious nosy Nellies.


What do you mean by wrong with you? Will they think you weird?



Rudin
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Jun 2015
Age: 22
Posts: 1,046
Location: Southern Ontario

10 Sep 2015, 5:17 pm

I'm not very skilled in the art of identifying body language or facial expressions. I do however have a healthy sense of apophenia. I can identify (subconsciously) when facial expressions or used (i.e when someone uses a facial expression more than once in more than one context). I skill have much progress to make but I have identified a few basic facial expressions.


_________________
"God may not play dice with the universe, but something strange is going on with prime numbers."

-Paul Erdos

"There are two types of cryptography in this world: cryptography that will stop your kid sister from looking at your files, and cryptography that will stop major governments from reading your files."

-Bruce Schneider


Rocket123
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Dec 2012
Age: 62
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,188
Location: Lost in Space

10 Sep 2015, 10:25 pm

hollowmoon wrote:
Subconsciously, do they find a constant lack of body language and facial expressions odd (Flat affect)? How do they perceive this?

I don't really give much thought to my body language or facial expressions. It’s just not something I think about. The psychologist who diagnosed me described my facial expression as flat. Generally, I have no idea how others perceive me.



GodzillaWoman
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Dec 2014
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 742
Location: MD, USA

10 Sep 2015, 10:36 pm

When I was a teenager, I used to practice facial expressions and voice in the mirror, based on what I saw on TV. I never could get the hang of flirting, though. I still have trouble getting similar expressions mixed up. People ask me if I am angry when I am actually sad or just tired.


_________________
Diagnosed Bipolar II in 2012, Autism spectrum disorder (moderate) & ADHD in 2015.