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Drifloon
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28 Sep 2015, 2:20 pm

Please help, I need my hair cut badly tomorrow but my grandma can't come with me tomorrow, I feel really anxious having to talk to the hairdresser and I never had to go by myself before, I have really poor speech and I am not so good at explaining things and the hairdressers always talk to you but always in the past they have spoken to my grandma. It's her and me that live in my house there's nobody else to come with me, what do I do? I don't want to get frightened. I am 22 years old but I was never able to do these things by myself without someone with me but I get really anxious and lost.



Cottnsick
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28 Sep 2015, 2:24 pm

Hey, is their know one else who can go with you??



Drifloon
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28 Sep 2015, 2:25 pm

No in the post it says nobody is there to go with me, I live in a small market town 10 miles from the nearest family member so I have to go myself and I asked my Uncle, he said he is building



Cottnsick
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28 Sep 2015, 2:34 pm

Drifloon wrote:
No in the post it says nobody is there to go with me, I live in a small market town 10 miles from the nearest family member so I have to go myself and I asked my Uncle, he said he is building


My bad didn't see that :p

Well I know how you feel, only you know if it's something you can handle or not.
If you're freaking out about it then don't bother (life ain't worth the stress). Maybe do some meditation or more socialising with people you're comfortable with and build up to it. I used to get my sister to cut my hair when things were really tough for me.



corroonb
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28 Sep 2015, 2:45 pm

I hate getting my hair cut too and my speech is pretty good. That sounds tough.

Can you go on another day when your grandmother can go with you?

You could type/write up an explanation of your condition with instructions about how you would like your hair cut. Ask your grandmother to write out something similar.



Drifloon
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28 Sep 2015, 2:50 pm

corroonb wrote:
You could type/write up an explanation of your condition with instructions about how you would like your hair cut. Ask your grandmother to write out something similar.


Hey that's a good idea I can do that thank you, will the hairdresser think I'm weird or it's ok ?



iliketrees
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28 Sep 2015, 2:58 pm

What helps me is knowing exactly what to do and say beforehand. I've had to go to the doctor by myself before and I was equally as scared about that, but before I went my dad texted me the exact instructions to follow. It won't look as weird looking at your phone. Try and get as familiar as possible with what you're doing beforehand and it should reassure you about it if you feel prepared. I wouldn't worry too much what the hairdresser thinks - you're a customer so they won't think much of it I don't imagine.



Drifloon
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28 Sep 2015, 3:08 pm

But I guess nothing could prepare me for the random questions I could get asked by the hair dresser x.x



iliketrees
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28 Sep 2015, 3:17 pm

That's very true. But I'm sure they won't interrogate you. Try and say at least something, even if it's "I don't know".



Drifloon
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28 Sep 2015, 3:29 pm

Ok I'll try, thanks, when it's all over I can post back as long as I don't forget like an idiot XD I've written down what I want and that I have autism and have problems speaking they will understand I'm sure.



Rabbers
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28 Sep 2015, 3:33 pm

You could write 'I have difficulty with speech so please excuse me if I don't respond'. That way they might not ask any questions or if they do they will understand why you don't answer.



iliketrees
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28 Sep 2015, 3:35 pm

Good luck, hope it goes well. :)



Dr.Pepper
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28 Sep 2015, 10:44 pm

I text or surf the web on my phone so I look like I'm busy and can't have a conversation.



windtreeman
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28 Sep 2015, 11:06 pm

I've got two probably pointless tidbits of info pertaining to your situation:
Firstly, I've definitely been in your shoes! Haircuts with talkative hairdressers can be so exhausting. A few years ago, I kind of had an epiphany and realized that of all people I might socially interact with, I care the least about how my hair-cutter perceives me. Once I convinced myself of that fact (the hardest part, no doubt), I actually began treating each haircut as a no-risk situation where I could practice my social skills. I went into it with zero expectations and did my best, which left me feeling more and more confident each time.

Secondly, and this is, of course, hotly contested by some...an anti-depressant (Paxil, for me), made an absolutely enormous difference for my social anxiety and GAD. It took at least a full year of treatment before I truly felt a difference, but now, a few years in, and I realized that getting on Paxil was the greatest decision of my life. Things like haircuts, doctor and dentist appointments and so much more that used to literally ruin the preceding week with stress, now feel manageable. There are drawbacks, but you've got to weigh the pros and cons personally. Best of luck!


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Drifloon
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29 Sep 2015, 10:11 am

So it's all over and it went great! I just read off the piece of paper and explained that I get anxious in social situations and the kind hairdresser, she said that I have nothing to worry about! She has an autistic son who is just like me and we had a very nice conversation about autism and cats and I left the hairdresser feeling really happy and with a haircut like Ramsay Bolton from Game of Thrones! (Only it's neater and not scruffy XD) I even had the confidence to go to the wetherspoons (That's a pub & restaurant in my area) and ordered on my own, she gave me one hell of a pep talk. Thanks to all for leaving the responses, the paper definitely helped and so did the lovely hair dresser!



iliketrees
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29 Sep 2015, 10:20 am

That's really great to hear. :D