When you couldn't love yourself....

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When you couldn't love yourself,
would you keep searching for someone to love you
or would you love yourself more before someone else?

And how could someone love oneself if there seems nothing to love?

Just answer whatever you want..randomly. It's just from the pure curiosity.

Okay..
If your cat has autism so he has little idea of how to socialize with other so-called NT cats,
would you force him to go out and face NTs to have him practice socializing skills?

If your autistic cat feels depressed all the time due to the negative traits of his disorder, how would you comfort him?

And if your autistic cat needs a girl friend how would you help him to have a girl friend?

I expect that you care for your autistic cat a lot..how about yourself..why not try to understand that it's okay to feel depressed/weak..

Last edited by Drawyer on 27 Oct 2015, 6:58 am, edited 1 time in total.

Maybe it's just me, but loving yourself sounds egocentric to me. I respect myself, but I don't love myself.

I see
loving yourself = respecting yourself.

It's far from being egocentric/ narcissism.

Edited..

Last edited by Drawyer on 27 Oct 2015, 6:57 am, edited 1 time in total.

One man's confidence is another man's arrogance sadly enough.

It's all dependent on what the other person already sees in you.

I got it, then let see in this thread loving oneself as respecting(understanding) oneself.

Understanding who you are and what you stand for morally is important..setting yourself limits and boundaries on what you will compromise on. Strong relationships always require a good amount of sacrifice and communication but you need to realize who you are and what you value.

It is easier said than done..sometimes you have to learn that the hard way by facing moral dilemmas or certain situations.

Yeah, I agree. thanks for your answer.

I was searching for love when I couldn't love myself & finding someone pulled me out of the depression I was in & I started loving myself more which stayed even after we broke up.

That makes sense.

I don't understand what "love yourself" means. Having a bigger ego doesn't solve the problem of loneliness. Having confidence doesn't solve the problem of loneliness. Having money doesn't solve the problem of loneliness. Nothing does except other people who actually care.

Let see ,in this thread, loving oneself as respecting(understanding) oneself.

When you have difficulties due to Autism, it's important not to bit yourself up to fit in with others too harsh. I see this as one way of self respecting. Giving examples of you being an autistic cat, in the second post on this thread, I wanted to give this views, I think I failed to convey what I intended to miserably.

I agree that's what "love yourself" should mean. Unfortunately when a lot of people say it they seem to mean something else. What they really mean is "you need to be happy before someone can love you", which is BS. Unhappiness doesn't stop love from happening in places that experience true hardship. It's just in spoilt western countries where love is contingent on happiness (i.e. posting lots of smiley pictures on facebook and pretending everything is always peachy fine). If you don't have an awesome life you don't deserve love. If you can't be 100% superficially entertaining 100% of the time you don't deserve love. Where are all the REAL people in this world?

Anyways, I think "love yourself" is a cop out meant to justify the lack of love and caring in our society. If we can all just "love ourselves" we don't need others anymore. We can just spend all our time feeding our egos with meaningless garbage.

I take loving yourself to mean treating yourself kindly and considerately, the way you would want others to treat you--to be forgiving and accepting of your mistakes and failings, to help you recognise your strengths, to support yourself emotionally when you are feeling low through self-care (making sure you eat well and sleep well, exercising, taking hot baths, doing yoga or meditating, reading a favourite book, listening to your favourite song--anything that soothes you and is a healthy behaviour). It just means being good to yourself and learning to like who you are and what makes you you. You don't have to be arrogant or narcissistic to do any of those things. When I learned to do these things (because I was taught inconsistently in this regard as a child) I found that loneliness was easier to live with.