How to socially backpedal?

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How does one socially proverbially back-pedal? Decelerate a social situation that has got out of control? I think I've blundered badly. Here is the situation if anyone is interested.
Recently, I have been trying to do better socially. I have no friends, no acquaintances, no one in life basically. I endeavoured to try socialising again and maybe make some connections.
So, a woman in my building strikes up a conversation whenever she sees me, and I have been trying to reciprocate and be friendly. This seemed to be going well, and we were able to stop and talk casually a few times a week. About a week ago she asked me to drop by her flat for a cup of tea, which I did. During that visit she changed her clothes (panties kept on) while I was in the room. I thought that was a bit forward, but didn't think she meant anything by it, as she had stated she viewed me like a sibling. She also had a personal problem that I was able to help her take care of, simply because I knew what to do and had experience in that area, and she hadn't. She was very grateful to me and I considered this a successful point A to B interaction. But since then, she has been knocking on my door every day at some point, asking me over for ice cream, and proceeding to gossip at me. If there's another social convention autistics are dismal at besides small talk, it has got to be gossip. Her gossip took a spiteful turn targeting a woman we both know of casually. She started rather viciously hate-bashing this woman, simultaneously undressing in front of me, repeatedly asking me what I thought of her body. It's at this point where I realise things have gone horribly wrong. I cannot stand listening to unmitigated hatred directed at anything or anyone, as I find it almost corrosive to me. I always end up hopelessly playing devil's advocate, offering possible alternative perspectives and explanations, trying to make everything "nice" for everyone. I also belatedly considered that with my assistance in her personal problems, I may have unintentionally indicated we are now at some other level of intimacy, even perhaps giving the impression that I am interested in her romantically, prompting her to reciprocate. This is most definitely not the case. I never intended for this to get complicated. I just intended to practice being a real human being - maybe we'd go out for a casual coffee sometimes or maybe run together, just be able to maintain an acquaintance, even just a conversation. I had no intention of giving the impression that I wanted her, no desire for her to want me, I don't want her knocking on my door and I certainly don't want to see her every day and socialise for long periods of time during which she takes off any of her clothes or bashes hate on anyone or anything. I'm now faced with the muddy waters of having to avoid her in the stairwell and make up excuses as to why I can't come over that are not untrue, as I can't lie. I have to diplomatically back out. Frankly I'm in over my head, and remembered why I don't socialise. I screw it up every time, and get into ridiculous situations like this. How the hell do I get out of this? How do you stop this sort of thing from happening? I don't know how I could have apparently communicated an intention that was so, so far from what I actually intended. How I would clear this up would be to directly tell her I had not intended to indicate that I wanted a constant every day association here, don't want her knocking on my door or to see her every day, I am not interested in her body or her romantically, all I was after was a casual acquaintance to keep up with in a light and superficial way, so I would prefer we returned to those parameters. But you can't just SAY that sh!t to people. If I can't get better at this I'm going to have to disclaimer every new connection I make - please note, regardless of any indications to the contrary, in no way do I want a constant companion or romance or nudity from this interaction. Thank you, management. It reminded me dismally of 'Big Bang Theory' character Sheldon and his prefabricated social agreement contracts.
Advice / input / experiences anyone?

This woman is obviously very interested in you romantically, so I don't think you can go back to a more casual arrangement. I've spent a lifetime keeping people at arm's length, and I can tell you that it doesn't usually end well. Generally, people just viewed me as as odd, cold, and someone not worth their time. You've struck on the core dilemma many aspies face: the need for a casual level of connection with our fellow human beings without all the pitfalls of more intimate relationships.

This woman sounds like she may well be a bit unbalanced, and/or one of those people who enjoy messing with people's heads. I've had my share of attention from people like this.

I've learned to suddenly be very busy whenever they are around, and to make myself more and more boring. It can only get worse if it continues to go on, until she finally gets tired of you and moves on to someone else.

Sometimes I wonder... Since we're not good at judging people's motives, maybe we blunder into unhealthy friendships that NT's would have the common sense to avoid. I think an NT would instantly realize that woman was strange, whereas you didn't see it straight away. And by the time you figured it out, you were already 'friends' with her. (It's happened to me too!)

(I apologize if I'm misreading the situation - I'm hopeless at this stuff too! Really not sure if her undressing was meant as a sexual advance, or just some weird bid for attention? )

It doesn't look like you're the one who screwed up in this scenario. There was much about her behaviour as you have described it, that falls outside of social norms (or in other words, was highly inappropriate). I suggest checking out http://www.doctornerdlove.com/ as a resource for dealing with this situation, and with socialization in general. Don't let the title mislead - the site isn't just about "romance" or "sex". The person offers a lot of sound, evidence-based advice about recognizing abusive behaviour, setting appropriate boundaries, and other relationship management issues. Although I am a woman, and it is aimed at helping "socially awkward" men, I have found it very useful and informative.

Best of luck to you, and please don't give up on yourself.

Your description of the situation made me laugh. I hope that you will be able to extricate yourself from this situation and in the future you can find in it an amusing (but still horrible and confusing) anecdote. I strongly identify with the awkwardness of the situation you have found yourself in. I think I cannot advise. It does seem you need to clearly set boundaries with this woman. I am really wishing you the best as these situations are so tormenting on an intellectual level too. In your situation, I would not know what to do and I do not know what an "ideal" person would advise to do. I think that I would try to avoid her, as you are already doing; I am also unable to lie so would not be able to pretend to have other commitments unless I truly have other commitments. I think, however, an "ideal" person might advise in this situation to pretend to have other commitments because this behaviour more strongly communicates "(implied) rejection" than avoidance of social interaction. I wish you the best of luck with resolving this situation; I hope you will update us how you get along.

However, I will say that my first thought on reading this is that she might be a lonely person, therefore if she is a lonely person I think this is why you have encountered problems in building a relationship with her. As, lonely people can act very strangely; in my experience, it is never good for people similar to us to build relationships with lonely people. I have had very bad experiences with lonely people, some of which were very similar to the one you describe.

Oh my... this is so similar to my situation a few months ago it's almost spooky. The phrase "biting off more than you can chew" comes into play here

You could try what I did and gradually attempt to taper off contact, or somehow put a limit on how much time you spend with her, and try to put her back in the "acquaintance" box that way. Success rates are uncertain though, she may go along with this or become more clingy. In the latter case, you might have to come clean in a polite but firm way...

Glad it's not just me.
You might be thinking "she's taking off her clothes you idiot, how much more direct do you want?" But even that isn't reliable given mitigating circumstances. I know some women who view nudity as nothing unusual, have no hang ups whatsoever about being naked in front of others - and especially young men have often got the wrong idea from this and made advances that were unwelcome, as the girl hadn't intended her rather casual view of nudity sexually, just viewed it as natural. I've known other girls who viewed even talking to me as an obvious form of flirtation, as culturally, it was risqué. It also puzzled me as she had previously stated her own sexual orientation and preferences, which should have discounted viewing me as a possible sexual partner. I highly suspect she also had assumptions about my own orientation that should have discounted worrying about me being interested in her that way. Thus, this sort of casual nudity might be in her view as platonic as undressing in front of a heterosexual woman or a homosexual man. Awareness of this just confuses me more as to what she intends by it. If life were simple undressing in front of company may automatically = sexual invitation, but unfortunately, especially between autistics and NTs, it's rarely simple. I automatically think I'm at fault in these types of situations because of autism. If a social situation goes wrong, I must have messed it up. But you guys are right, this may well be her inappropriate behaviour rather than mine, and damaged people are even more unpredictable than stable ones. Through our casual talks I had acknowledged that we are very different, but I don't require people to be exactly like me for casual friendship, and indeed often value people who are different so I can learn about things outside of my own experience, but this last encounter makes me rethink pursuing any kind of connection with her. If all she has to talk about is self-praising and seeking praise or hate-bashing gossip involving others, then we have nothing to talk about, and need go no further.
I had some paperwork to complete and am taking a few days at my parents' place and away from mine, thus missing a party she invited me to, so hopefully that can begin the process of tactical disengagement. I don't wish to be rude or upset her, likely causing drama for myself with the neighbours if I did as we do still have to live in the same building, but yes. I think backing off slowly is best. The worrying part is I still have no idea how this happened and thus, how to prevent it in future. As said above, I just can't "read" people the way I need to. Hopefully next time I try this, my counterpart isn't just as inept as I am.