Does anyone else ever feel this way?

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Fnord
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20 Dec 2015, 11:49 am

Sometimes, when things are going really well for me (especially at work), I get this feeling that at any moment, someone is going to tap me on the shoulder and tell me that I don't belong there.

Or maybe I'll be at a party, in some quiet corner, watching everyone else having a good time, and I'll get the feeling that at any moment, someone is going to tap me on the shoulder and tell me that I wasn't invited.

It seems to happen most around the winter holidays.

Does this happen to you?

the_phoenix
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20 Dec 2015, 12:14 pm

Oh, in fact this happened last night.

I was attending my boss's Christmas party. Everything was going well. I was talking to people ... there were actually science fiction fans at the party.

As I was just finishing up a successful social evening and heading out the door, the boss asked a fateful question: Was I going home for Christmas? Things went downhill from there.

Well, I'm an honest person, so now I'm praying that everything all works out, and that my being honest and not the greatest with words will not be held against me. For my part, I'm going to send a thank-you card to the host ... hopefully, that will rekindle some of the former happy feelings of the occasion.

So it wasn't just a feeling ... it was a reality.
And life will go on.

I'm a phoenix, after all ...
so I will do my best to rise up from the ashes
yet again.

...

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Peacesells
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20 Dec 2015, 12:29 pm

the_phoenix wrote:

...

I don't get what went wrong, sorry, could you explain? I think it's because English is not my first language.

the_phoenix
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20 Dec 2015, 12:46 pm

Peacesells wrote:

the_phoenix wrote:

...

I don't get what went wrong, sorry, could you explain? I think it's because English is not my first language.

Hi Peacesells,

What went wrong is that I am not going home for Christmas. And even though I tried to communicate this in a polite way, nobody likes to hear negative things like that. Especially not at Christmas. And it's not a good way to end an evening. At a party, everyone wants to feel happy. Many people tell "little white lies" to be polite and keep the mood upbeat. Not me. When asked a question, I respond honestly with the truth. Simply being real is all it takes to get in trouble.

...

Grammar Geek
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20 Dec 2015, 12:57 pm

Yep. Whenever I'm happy about something, I feel that it's only that it's only a matter of time before something tells my brain "You don't deserve this" and the good time will be ruined in an instant.

Peacesells
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20 Dec 2015, 1:08 pm

the_phoenix wrote:

Peacesells wrote:

the_phoenix wrote:

...

I don't get what went wrong, sorry, could you explain? I think it's because English is not my first language.

If I can ask, where were you going that is so negative?

the_phoenix
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20 Dec 2015, 1:20 pm

Peacesells wrote:

the_phoenix wrote:

Peacesells wrote:

the_phoenix wrote:

...

I don't get what went wrong, sorry, could you explain? I think it's because English is not my first language.

If I can ask, where were you going that is so negative?

Just the fact that I'm not going home is enough to "spoil the mood" for most NTs.
Then I mentioned I was going to a homeless shelter ... another shock, even when
I clarified that I was going as a volunteer, to bring food.

...

Peacesells
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20 Dec 2015, 1:34 pm

the_phoenix wrote:

I'm not sure that it has anything to do with them being NTs, maybe they're just stupid. I don't see why anyone would be sad oreven care about something you prefer to do instead of being home, it's your business. It reminds me of that town Ned Flanders once moved to.

Spiderpig
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20 Dec 2015, 1:40 pm

I avoid the problem by making sure things are never going too well.

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Grammar Geek
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20 Dec 2015, 1:42 pm

Peacesells wrote:

the_phoenix wrote:

It reminds me of that town Ned Flanders once moved to.

Humbleton? I'm not sure how that involves volunteering; he went there because he was annoyed the Springfield residents and how they deceived him. He went to a homeless shelter in 'Tis the Fifteenth Season; perhaps you're thinking of that.

Oh, I'm ranting about one of my special interests. Sorry about that.

Peacesells
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20 Dec 2015, 2:40 pm

Grammar Geek wrote:

Peacesells wrote:

the_phoenix wrote:

It reminds me of that town Ned Flanders once moved to.

I mean how these people behaved shocked for any normal and trivial thing Ned would do, much like the_phoenix's boss.

Grammar Geek
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20 Dec 2015, 2:49 pm

Ah, I gotcha. Yeah, I would think people would find you to be a good person if you were volunteering at a homeless shelter, not act shocked.

Spiderpig
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20 Dec 2015, 3:00 pm

They might resent it because it implies they should be doing the same. The best way to offend people en masse is to look like you think you're better than someone, for any reason. The reason doesn't matter.

Dunsparce
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20 Dec 2015, 6:02 pm

Grammar Geek wrote:

Yep. Whenever I'm happy about something, I feel that it's only that it's only a matter of time before something tells my brain "You don't deserve this" and the good time will be ruined in an instant.

Same thing happens to me.

babybird
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20 Dec 2015, 6:46 pm

Yes I do get that feeling sometimes.

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probly.an.aspie
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20 Dec 2015, 8:01 pm

I often feel like i can't be too happy or the rug will be pulled out from under me. Or if things are going well, i feel like i don't deserve it. I can't think of anything i've done wrong to bring on this feeling. It's just there.

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