jokes anybody

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Z here. I like jokes.anyone know a good one.

here are some I like,
Why did Z put his dad in the fridge?
He wanted to have a ice cold pop.


Why did Z throw butter out the window?
He wanted to see a butterfly.

Why did Z throw a clock out the window?
He wanted to see time fly.

Why did Z take a ladder to school?
He heard it was a high school.

Remember I'm an Aspy and very literal.

Now, you tell me one.

Two fish are in a tank.


One says to the other,


"How do you drive this thing?".

Three guys are walking down the sidewalk. The first two walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

Rudy was showing the American tourist couple around Moscow when it began to precipitate. "Its starting to sleet" said the man. "No," says Rudy, "its rain." 'No, it's sleet" says the man again. Quickly the wife steps up to declare "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear"



Merle

Three men are in the woods. A dumb man, an englishman, and a frenchman. The frenchman catches a moose. The dumb man asks "how did you do that?" The frenchman says "I followed the tracks and caught the moose." Later the englishman catches a rabbit. The dumb man asks "how did you do that?" The englishman said "I followed the tracks and caught the rabbit." Later the dumbman comes to the englishman and the frenchman all beat up. The englishman asks "what happened?" The dumbman says "I followed the tracks and got hit by the train."

Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 8 9

ellemenopee. ellemenopee. What in the world is an ellemenopee? I'll give you a hint : A B C D E F G H I J K ELLEMENOPEE ....

Thanks, guys keep them coming. Heres another,

If you are an American when you go into the bathroom and you are an American
when you come out what are you while you are in the bathroom?

Answer, You're a peein', of course.

Courtesy of my sister S.

Here's one NZers will get (and Ozzies):

A Frenchman, and Englishman, a Chinese man, and Australian and a New Zealander are in a plane. Suddenly the plane drop down low and they are about to hit the Eiffel Tower, and need to lose weight.
"For my country!" says the Frenchman, and he jumps off.
Suddenly they are about to hit Big Ben, and need to lose more weight.
"For my country!" says the Englishman, and he jumps off too.
Once again, they are about to hit the Great Wall of China.
"For my country!" says the Chinese man, and he jumps down.
Finally, they are about to hit the Sky Tower, and the New Zealander says
"For my country!"
and shoves the Australian off.

I like that one KABABZ.

What do you call a person who constantly gets walked all over?

Matt.

Keep 'em coming

what do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other ??


Ilene



and her Chinese cousin?

Irene

Merle

Here's another from Z [that's me]

I have 6 eyes, 2 mouths, and 3 ears. What am I?

Answer UGLY!! !

Hope to hear some more!

What do you call a man sitting on the toilet? John

What do you call a man trying to sit on the toilet for as long as he can? John-athon

What do you call a man with a shovel in his back? Doug

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob


Smelena

Us Ozzies like to make lots of jokes regarding New Zealanders (Kiwis) and sheep!!

Also, us Ozzies like to make fun of the Kiwi accent.

eg This is a Kiwi counting to 10, "One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Sux, Siven, Eight, Nine, Tin"

Smelena

Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes?

A: No eye-deer.


Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?

A: Still no eye-deer

AussieBoy

Sopho_soph here is one for you......

in the
greek alphabet why was epsilon afraid of zeta?

because zeta eta theta!