people fixations

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I've noticed that I get fixated on people at times, and even when given a reason to not want anything to do with them, or to not think about them / want to think about them, the fixation doesn't subside. I've "gotten past people," but it is like it is always there in the back of my mind, dormant, just waiting for a reason to come screaming to the front again and take over.

Alcohol doesn't help, because if I'm blacked out it may come to the front and lead to me being an as*hole, if I at one point viewed the person in a negative light. I'm told that one night recently I followed someone around and called her all manner of nasty things until a friend and a mutual friend tried to start fending me off by distracting me. I also at times rant when I'm drunk, often about things I shouldn't be speaking with others about, in that they won't keep quiet about it or others still will overhear. I'll wake up the next morning, not remember what transpired, and the fixation is back dormant. Asked about it, I won't have the slightest clue why I was apparently thinking about the person the night before.

I haven't spoken with one of my neighbors in quite some time. There was a bit of a falling out, and she has since not really said anything to me. I haven't said anything to her, because I don't know if that would even be wanted by her, but I'm sure that that comes off as if I'm the one that doesn't want to talk. I haven't seen her in over a month. I was convinced that I was done giving a damn about her. I saw her, and something went off in my brain. Nostalgia, something else, I don't know, but the thoughts came rushing back. I have no idea why. I even believe there's no reason to think about her at this point, I'm not simply telling myself that, yet it is like an automatic reaction or something.

Anyone else had any kind of problems with this sort of thing?

I have that kind of fixation as well.

Tim

I find when I get drunk aggressive, speaking loudly, get annoyed with general annoying ballox and react to it

Also I find when I get really drunk I will have no memory of what I have done who have annoyed etc ansd find it annoying when they get all annoyed the next day

Does being obsessed with Rock n Roll groups count?

I would think so.

Tim

I get people fixations
I think I always have

I'd agree with that. They don't seem to be as constant for me, usually just a rapid burst and it is over, or rapid bursts every so often. Band I like, I research the singer.

Limerence suuuuucks.

Story of my life, only they tend to become all consuming obsessions where you can guarantee that if I open my mouth, it will be about that person 90% of the time...and no matter what the topic, I will end up bringing that person into it. Had this since I was very young...and it is very frustrating, and often acutely painful as rarely are the feelings involved when the fixation is romantic in nature...returned.

No one I like ever likes me
I will have to suffer unrequited love for the rest of my life I expect...

That has been my situation with all but one of the women I had been fixated with.

Tim

I think I've had two times where that wasn't the case. As for those two times, I'm unsure as to whether I was interested in them because of them, or because I was interested in them because they were interested in me.

I try not to look at either of those parts of my life as a mistake (or any part, if I can help it, as all of it can be learned from) but I do wonder if it was the right choice or action on my part.....if that makes any sense.

As of late it seems like I simply misread the person, and that they really just used me, simple as that. Most of the time, not just as of late.

i am in love with a woman,or i think i am,,i never stop thinking about her,i could be obesesed with her,she has used me before and she has no interest in dating me,

Me too man.


And with several people at that.

I have a fixation with an Aspie woman I began a correspondence nearly a year ago, who promised to be my girlfriend and promised to marry me immediately after I graduated from college. But after three weeks of correspondence, I never heard from her again.

I keep hoping that she will resurface, but those hopes are getting dimmer.

Tim