What is it like to transition?

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For those of you who don't know what transition means, It's when a transgender endures a certain type of surgery where their body is transformed into their desired gender.

Of course, as some of you might have guessed, I'm thinking about doing transition. However I would like to know what I'm facing before I can make such a big decision.

Generally what I'd like know is:

1. What is life like without private parts?

2. Can you still have intimate relationships despite not being able to have an orgasm?

3. What are the variety of ways transgenders transition? I've herd of many different procedures they do besides hormone therapy.

I hope you all can answer all of these questions as best as you can!

In the strictest sense 'transition' means to live as yourself.

For some that means adopting a social gender other than the one assigned at birth. That might mean going by a different gendered name, adopting different mannerisms & body usage and wearing different clothing.

For some it means taking hormones to gain the secondary sex characteristics their brain expects their body to have. And some find that their body actually works better on the 'other' sex hormone, sometimes for the first time since puberty. As one of our family's endocrinologists put it, "transgender people are more accurately medically thought of as being of mixed sex development, and there are hundreds of sex-dimorphic sites to mix throughout the body, including the brain".

For some it means surgery to fix the things that hormones cannot.

Trans people who have had surgery still have private parts, or genitals; they've just been reshaped. A surgeon reworks the tissue into what they could've been if they had developed the 'other' way. Since the nerves are preserved, orgasm is usually still attainable. For some who had high body dysphoria before transition it can be more attainable after, since they are able to be sexual as the 'correct' sex/gender and thus enjoy sex.

Thank you so much for your descriptive reply!! ! For once I thought I was never gonna get any answers on this thread.

If you're on the spectrum and need support for that, then if you transition don't be surprised if you find that it evaporates and disappears forever. Don't mistakenly believe that the trans community will step in and fill in the gaps: They won't. If you're on the spectrum, they'd rather you just disappear, so they don't look so bad. It'll be like a slow-motion train wreck while you're on the train, cognizant of what is happening but unable to do anything about it.

Also, looking at your picture, prepare to be misgendered over and over again and have people make stupid excuses for it, but you know that you simply don't pass.

Um...Excuse me, but you seem to have the following issues:

1. What's with the negativity? Also what do you mean by "it evaporates and disappears"? Why do you assume that the trans community will reject me in any form, shape or way? Also, what do you mean by "Spectrum"? The Autism spectrum? I know that they're some bad trans people out there the same way that they are good ones, but you're putting it as if ALL of transgender community rejects the autism spectrum. And I'll have you know that I've seen various users here who are both transgenders, crossdressers and gay who just so happen to be both autistic and good people.

Either you appear to biased or your misspelling led me to misunderstand your point. Which brings me to my next point...

2. Your spelling is completely flawed. And for someone whose profile says that she's 31 years old you sure had a lot of nerve to leave your reply as as it is. (I'm 19 years old and my spelling is nowhere near as flawed as yours!) It may not seem like a big deal to you, but it goes to show that you may be uneducated and/or don't care about what you are writing and just spew out whatever comes through your mind with any real consideration about it.

Also This thread asks what life is like as a transexual/transgender who went through hormone therapy or operation. just who do you think you are to be telling what life is like after transitioning? Are you a trans? Your reply sure doesn't seem to give me that impression unfortunately.

Yes, I am a trans woman who is living full-time and I am on the autism spectrum. Through most of my 20s I lived with my parents and did reasonably well, but they realized I was transitioning and wanted to push me out the door. I did OK at first, but my impairments caught up to me and I wasn't able to succeed. I couldn't save money, I could barely work, etc. I thought, how wonderful if I get accommodations for my impairments so I can focus on surgery, working, saving, and going to school? I tried getting help from the local trans community, but they seemed more interested in talking about the meaning of the color red and video games. I tried getting help online, but they were like you just need to save. They didn't care or know anything about my impairments and ended up banning me for getting too uppity. Because of this, I despaired. I am now on SSDI.

I'm warning you: If you're on the autism spectrum, don't believe that things will necessarily go any differently for you.

I'd like to help, but I'm not trans. I just have a close friend undergoing transition but I can't really answer your questions. You might get more answers on an LGBT forum, as this section is one of many niches here on WrongPlanet and I don't know how many people read.

I've found many mainstream LGBT forums to be no more understanding or accommodating of AS/ASD quirks than other NT people. One of the reasons WP's lgbt forum is so incredibly unique and wonderful - and needed!

Still, for specific questions they are useful, so long as you write carefully & go back and re-read & edit before sending so as to be absolutely clear. But they still sometimes react to people who are 'odd' in a negative way, which is ironic if you think about it statistically...

It's unfortunately true what they say, about the LGBT community being unaccepting like that. But dont think that's limited to just them... it seems to be a bizarre natural thing for people to act that way when part of any community. Doesnt really matter what kind of community, people will still tend to push out anyone that they think doesnt fit.

And I think most of us here on this forum overall already know what THATS like. Too many people just get so wonky about the whole autism thing. It's annoying, but... yeah, gotta be ready for it in case it happens!

I hate that things are that way, but... what can anyone really do about it? Bah.

But... that's what you have everyone HERE for, right?

This part seemed a bit uncalled for in my opinion...

Misery,

I just noticed the extreme angle of the profile pic, which is a common tactic for trans women to make themselves look like they pass when they really don't. It encouraged me to investigate it further, and yup...

Anyway, I don't pass worth crap. Even people who know me well, but didn't know me before I transitioned, frequently mess up. To be honest, I am long past caring about that. But what annoys me most are the excuses they always make to assuage their own guilt. They're like, well, I have a trans son and that caused me to use "him" a lot, or I'm thinking of another person as I talk to/about you. I don't even call them out on the misgendering, yet these excuses come pouring out like a flood.

What bugged me was just that she wasnt looking for an opinion on the profile pic... this topic wasnt about that. And it seemed harsh enough that in a way, it might have ended up being a bit hurtful. I'm not sure.

I mean, I can appreciate total honesty... I've shown my own photos before, in the "crossdressing" thread, though I'm not trans and am mostly just after an androgynous appearance... and I really do prefer that people be absolutely honest with me when I show those. And in many places it's hard to get opinions on the damn things. I try to be honest to others too.

But, in those cases, and certainly in that topic, those opinions are specifically asked for. I dont believe for a second that you meant your comment here in a malicious or mean way. I've seen you around here alot; you're not the sort that'd do such a thing, I think. But when a "brutally honest" (as I call it, I'm too lazy to think of a better term) opinion is stated, when opinions in general were not asked for, it can sorta give that impression.

That's all I meant, really. I dont know what her thoughts are on that.

Also I dont understand the "extreme angle" bit, what does that mean? I dont know photography. Anyone that's seen any photo of me can probably tell. I just take the pics straight-on and am too lazy to do otherwise, so I dont really understand that stuff.

Misery,

She was wanting to know what it was like and, well, I'm coming from a rather miserable experience.

I know.

I've seen some of your posts around.

I'm never sure of what to say to things like that when I read through them, but... yeah, I've read through some of it as you've posted from time to time. I know it's bloody difficult as hell, and painful. I dont doubt it for a second.

Are we still friends, Benefici?

The Blonde Alien: I will definitely support you if/when you decide to transition. If I can help you out in any way, just tell me.