What are your social difficulties?

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What makes it hard for you to socialize?

I was asked this question and I find it hard to answer. Inside of me, I know what it is, but I simply can't explain.

just to rattle off a few

Anxiety, lack of confidence/self esteem, somewhat rigid narrow interests, repetitive conversation, info-dumping, communication issues with the volume and clarity of my voice, enunciation, not being able to read social cues, not giving off the right social cues, lack of eye contact, either stiff body language or all over the place pacing and turning my back on people, stimming and fidgeting in general, paranoia, lack of social capital.

The fear of others' not being interested in what i'm saying. The fear that i don't reciprocate properly. It's a bit of paranoia which prevents me from keeping track of conversations when in a group. Because of the said paranoia and the preoccupation with my concern, jokes go over my head, more often than not. Add to that he fear that i can get very emotional about a topic that comes up which would make me feel vulnerable and so on. When one on one i don't have any difficulty picking up on cues. I never carried one-sided conversations. Maybe I'm not autistic after all

~My entire social anxiety. :/
~Speaking the wrong words at the wrong time.
~Saying something very blunt or candid when meaning it a different way in my head but it comes out wrong.
~Getting distracted mid-conversation.
~Never making eye contact unless I'm pressured to.
~Taking things too literally and getting frustrated when people tell me not to.
~Forgetting what I was saying after searching for a word.
~Epic stuttering.
~Not fully knowing when it's my time to respond to someone.
~Having people expecting certain reactions to me and getting a deadpan face from me instead.
~Being in a crowded area and becoming overstimulated within seconds.
~Getting odd looks when I stim a lot.
~Feeling like someone is not aesthetic enough for my eyes so I cannot look or talk to them without feeling like I'm not aesthetic anymore. (When I say "not aesthetic" it's like their presence feels like sandpaper to me, and I need an aura that's smooth like a wineglass or soft like a plush blanket. Or relating a super knotted squiggly line compared to a smooth straight line.)

I could keep going. D;

My entire social anxiety. :/
~Speaking the wrong words at the wrong time.
~Saying something very blunt or candid when meaning it a different way in my head but it comes out wrong.
~Getting distracted mid-conversation.
~Never making eye contact unless I'm pressured to.
~Taking things too literally and getting frustrated when people tell me not to.
~Forgetting what I was saying after searching for a word.
~Epic stuttering.
~Not fully knowing when it's my time to respond to someone.
~Having people expecting certain reactions to me and getting a deadpan face from me instead.

does this happen when one on one too? or only in groups?

-Knowing what I should say but not saying it, due to social anxiety

-Not asking other people questions, which makes me seem uninterested (again, due to social anxiety)

-Sometimes being goofy and impulsive (might have ADHD)

-Difficulty memorizing pop culture facts

-Anxiety of speaking up in a group

-Not always knowing how to be curious without being called nosy, or how to join in a conversation without being accused of butting in, so to avoid social embarrassment, I just stay quiet

-Can't always think of a response (comeback) to a joke right away, so I just laugh instead (which is better than nothing I suppose)

-Having not a monotone as such, but a weak voice (unless I'm with family/partner)

-Attention difficulties

-Finding being in authority EXTREMELY hard and daunting, which is why I avoid jobs that involve interacting with the public or caring for children or the elderly, etc.


Not many social difficulties really, but still enough to make life hard.

I've been following your posts for a while and i have to say you don't strike me as an aspie. You are too aware of what others may feel to be an aspie. You get nonverbal cues, it's just the social anxiety that holds you back from acting properly i guess.

My social difficulties are my social difficulties.

In a nutshell, I have no idea what's going on and what I should be doing so I end up failing so badly that the list of irrational fears I came up with before hand starts to come true.

Inside and since I regressed from training after head injury these are pointed out behaviors
_ catching pauses (result being talkover)

_ info dumping

_ attention breaks

_ sporadic eye contact (it makes me bitey to retain too long)

_ taking things literal or for face value until well into my 30s ***** The biggest and most impacting detriment in all eras of my aging

* the business of environment in sound or color or movement can bring further negative social behaviors

But these problems were not obvious I was well trained in socialization as a daughter of mover and shaker expected to make a good catch and be a positive help to husband. >_< I normally was quiet and nodded a lot. My redirected calming behaviors are not as eye catching as flapping, rocking or self biting

When it comes right down to it, I'd rather not be social at all. I'd rather be friendly.

I see some of you mention social anxiety. Do you avoid doing things because you fear people's reactions and judgment? That's social anxiety. The social diffculties in autism, however, are not caused by anxiety alone (but you can have both autism and social anxiety - but in this case, social anxiety would be a consequence of social difficulties).

Not liking to be social, or lacking social skills is not social anxiety.

It's not bad really, but I just can't talk to normal people. I have zero interest in whatever they're interested in and I say such off the wall things that they look at me like I'm crazy. My interests are way too narrow anyway and it seems I communicate better if you're drug addicted and homeless.

People say I talk on and on and people complain that I talk about myself and ignore other people. A lot of people have gotten really angry and cut off their relationship with me, although I wasn't aware that I was doing anything wrong. I had two friends who recently cut off their relationships with me, charging that I don't do anything but talk about myself. They seemed to be quite angry and think I'm an as*hole, but I'm really a nice guy and had no idea I was doing anything wrong.