Questions about suicide methods

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First of all, hi, my name is Ryan, I am 23 years old. Me and my girlfriend who I met online were in a long distance relationship for the last 10 months when out of nowhere she said she just didn't love me anymore and left me. I don't have a job, social life, no friends, and I really thought this girl was the one (we even had plans for her to come visit and even move in with me). I hardly go outside and meeting people is impossible. I don't want to be alone but I have to face the facts that I will most likely live the rest of this useless life that way. That sounds very selfish but I can't help it. I guess I just don't deal with rejection easily.

I am an undiagnosed autistic (aspergers) with bad social/general anxiety. I was prescribed Zoloft about a year ago. I don't want to go down this path but I am wondering what the quickest way to die would be. I am considering mixing zoloft with tylenol and alcohol (all large doses). Can anyone help me with suggestions? I realize most methods are painful but as long as I don't come back I don't think I care anymore.

I won't tell you how to do it. But I will tell you trying to end yourself using tylenol is one of the worst ways to go. I've heard/read of many people who've tried, and failed, and wind up needing liver transplants because they survived but had their liver wrecked by the massive OD of tylenol. It's a miserable, painful way to go.

Have you tried a suicide hotline? I tried it when I was feeling desperate, and it worked. It is a marvelous thing just to have someone to talk to, who is willing to listen.

Hi Ryan

My name is rick and I am in day 11 of a constant migraine. I have been thinking a lot about suicide as well.

I have spent the last three days in bed with the blanket pulled over my head to cut out the light and sound.

Doctors have tried 5 different medications as well as the ones I am currently taking for migraine.


I have a few questions for you.

Do you really want to die or do you just want your situation to change?

These are two different things and sometimes we need to push the limits of life before we are ready to make some big changes.

I had to overdose on heroin and cocaine a couple of times before I was ready to stop using drugs.

How bad are you willing for things to get before you are ready to start making the changes you need to make?

Rejection sucks, I ended a five year relationship in July of 2015 and then turned around got into and ended another this summer. I was in rough shape and I have always held suicide as an option even when I was five.

I want say something about age. As NTs get older the as*holes that made life hell in school tend to disappear, or at least they have for me, and I find that people are more supportive and kind if I give them a chance.

I have to work on Monday, but can be reached pretty easy through this site until then.

Reply or send me a PM if you would like to communicate more.

Talk to your psychiatrist about trying another medication. There are other types available. I'd give yourself a few years yet, but I hear ya.

This may sound like a really stupid thing but I feel like I need someone to love and be with me romantically in order to have a complete life. I don't want to die alone. So I guess I just want my situation to change. This girl still wants to be friends so that's better than nothing at all but I don't know how long it will take or even if my true feelings for her will disappear. I keep thinking about where it all went wrong and if it's something I did but she says it's her and that feelings just change. I also feel like maybe I'm too clingy. She was only my first real girlfriend and I got quite emotionally attached. Maybe I set myself up for this heartbreak.

I did have an internet friend talk me down and it seemed to help a bit but I don't know what I will be like tomorrow. It's been a long day emotionally and mentally and I think I'm going to try and sleep. Thank you all for your replies it means a lot to me.

No it is not stupid at all.

I have found that the more I rely on a girlfriend to supply all of my emotional needs, the harder it is on them and easier it for me to be hurt.

Firsts are always the hardest. Sleep and if you want to communicate more tomorrow, post again or send me a PM.

Hi Ryan,

My nephew, also 23 (NT), was feeling pretty bad & rejected last year, so he crashed his car into a lake in Texas, and he admits that it was on purpose. He was badly hurt, but lived, and he now looks back on it and he sees only now, that he had some other ways to handle how he felt. He's grateful now, that he failed to take his own life, and so of course is our family. In his case, he thought he was a big failure when he realized that he didn't want to be the man who his parents had decided (for him) that he would have to be, and at the same time, he loves his parents so much that he could never explain to them how he felt. It was just awful communications skills. So he came out to California to live with my wife and me for a year, and he found that he was lying to himself most of his life, about what he wanted to do for a career, and for the lifestyle he wanted. He's working on himself very hard, and has taken some new directions in life, and every day that goes by is another day further from hating his life, and another day further from letting others decide what he is, and what he wants in life. Long story short, you can end things, but even though I don't know you, I DO know that you have choices of where you want your life to go.

Also, I think you might want to talk to whoever is prescribing Zoloft, or any other psych meds you're on (or were on), because suicide thoughts are a BIG side effect of some of those in some people, and I think Zoloft is one of the worst. Also you can read about that yourself, and think about it.

And by the way, since you started this thread, I think you do care about yourself, and you do have a future that you can make whatever you want to make of it!

Charles

The best way to kill yourself is to become somebody your past self would never recognize. People go through many deaths before they die, and all are painful. You have a lot of time ahead of you to change the things you don't like about yourself. It's easier said than done, but you'll never beat social anxiety by becoming a shut-in. Go places, say hi to strangers, compliment people. You never know what might start a meaningful relationship. I met one of my friends because she was wearing a My Little Pony shirt. I like the show too, I complimented her on her shirt, and we started talking about our favorite characters. You don't have to be limited to befriending people your own age either. Don't give up on life so quickly. You don't have to go out and be social now if the pain's still fresh, let yourself feel it, then get back up. And in case you think I'm spouting BS, I've tried to kill myself too. If I had access to a gun, I wouldn't be here right now. I've had severe depression and social anxiety throughout most of my childhood. Now I'm on the road to overcoming it. It's not impossible. It takes a lot of hard work and patience, but the greatest thing about the human brain is that it's always learning, growing, and changing.

I think you might be being a bit hard on yourself if you think it had to be something you did, It's probably more that it was a long distance relationship and you and you and her didn't meet in person at all...I can see how it would be hard to maintain a long distance relationship. But yeah it probably is more likely it just wasn't working for her to try and be in a long distance on-line relationship. But yeah she was your first, doesn't mean she has to be your last girlfriend, I think realistically most people don't find a lasting long term relationship with the first person they date...some people get lucky that way maybe but i certainly didn't.

But yeah I don't advise suicide, it makes sense to be upset about this and feel a bit devastated so not judging you for suicidal feelings....I've been on the verge of it myself and even attempted once when I was 15. But yeah the terrible way you might feel now is unlikely to last forever. It's far better to look back on feeling like that than going through with it and never finding out if things can get any better or what you might miss out on in life.