wish i wasnt born

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idk why i exist, i hate having aspergers, people dont care about me. my grades in school are terrible, people call me wierd creepy, i have no friends, i now sit by myself at lunch because people i thought was my friends are always so mean to me. ik im ugly because the people have spoken. every year in school. my family in the house are inconsiderate of my feelings and emotions, they never take the time to hear me out and u.n.d.e.r.s.t.a.n.d my side of the story. my family has no real knowledge of aspergers so when they (without my permission) tell someone what i have, they would say "yea he has aspergers, has problems talking to people, thats y hes so quiet"....when i hear one of my famiy members say something like that i just pisses me off 2 the max because they dont even know the basics to it. my mom act like she cares but when im in trouble she always make it seem im wrong for doing things and she says the meanest things in the world to me, she barely knows what (a.s) is. my family is stupid, n i wish i could kill them at times but there r consuquences for that. people think i get mad over small stuff but its not small 2 me. i wish i could tell people how i feel, whats going on, what my problem is, how their words and actions shatter my spirit, but i cant because i never had a real friend before. nobody knows anything about me because i keep a mask on all this till im alone and at times will cry to myself or rant, i could break some stuff ot of anger. i could go on about more but i wont bore u anymore

You can talk to me. I'm in the same situation. Think I'm older than you though. Out of school now.

My heart breaks for you and your situation. This is my with my mothering (side on cuddle sent for you) and christian hat on. I hope and pray you get the help and there are people out there can help. I glad that you were born as the world would be a poorer place for people like us.

I have been in that position before. Don't give up, it does get better. When it was happening to me I wanted to jsut reun away, or die. I was depressed and wanted to die. One of the most important things to realize is that you are not alone in this situation. That being said this does not make you insignificant. I would build up the courage to talk to your family about it because they may not know you feel this way. My father and I butted heads at times and I did not feel comfortable talking to him about how I felt. When I gained the courage, we were able to see that there was something wrong. Recently we have built this form of communication that helped relay how I was feeling. It was a process, yet it will help. Hang in there. You seem like a good person and you are not broken or alone.