What else do women want out of a relationship?

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Yes, I know about the job (which I'm still not employed, unfortunately) and own place, car optional depending on the girl, etc. but is there anything else less superficial that could be missing too? If I were to have a job, even if it was a rather crappy job at first, would even that not be enough for her?

I want to have a better dating and social life. I want an attractive-looking partner (within reason) who I can also get on with socially. The thing is about me, I don't know if I want the more casual dating or sex for now, or go straight into finding a committed relationship.

Being with my ex before, I have learned what I would dislike in a future partner.

Um, yes. You're overlooking a lot of less superficial things. Personality, sense of humour, interest in her, attraction to her, being a good listener, being intelligent, being able to carry a conversation, having some sort of talent/skill she appreciates etc.

Depends on the girl. Maybe some just care that you're able to function in society well enough to hold down any full time job. Maybe some care what type of job you do or what your title is. Others might not care what you do for a living so long as you earn a lot of money. Every individual person is going to have different criteria for what they want in a partner's job/education/income for various reasons. There is no blanket black & white answer to this.

Maybe you won't know what type of relationship until you're with someone and that particular person is suited to one type and not another. If you don't have a specific preference for a one night stand or a long term relationship right now, just go with the flow and see what happens.

Most women in my state don't consider min wage a real job. So eliminate any service type job such as retail.

I know guys who don't have any of these things who have girlfriends.

And we know guys who do have jobs, a car, etc. And dont have a boyfriend or girlfriend yet, aka all 3 of you goldfish sly and retrogamer.

Whale oil beef hooked.

I think you must also deeply consider what you want as well. As some times aspo's can be thinking simplistically of what they can do to be the perfect partner, and by doing so. You end up not being the perfect partner for most woman, as you try too hard to please and give too much.

A relationship is exactly that, in that it is a relationship between more than one party, so there are more than one person is involved. You are not employed by your partner, so your partner isn't your boss. So a relationship should be on negotiable terms.

This can be tricky for people with communication problems, and who see things logically, black and white and do not play mind games, as most neurotypical people do.

My ex-wife, thought that i was psychologically abusive because i didn't play mind games to manipulate her (it's like i didn't care). I think she also thought that i was abusive because i didn't commit adultery and was loyal and expectant of her faithfulness.

Even though i did not abuse her, while all her other boy friends did, including physical violence. It is I who she has stalked and spread vicious slander about. I guess because i am rubbish at lying and communicating. and i was not prepared to lie to her in order to manipulate her to get her back on my side.

Another thing, before getting into the relationship with this sociopath. I had not had a girl friend for some time.
So was desperate to do so, as i thought that it was the key to my happiness. This is also part of the reason why i was prepared to go to such extreme lengths to make it work. I was also suffering from low self esteem, so was reluctant to finish the relationship, even though i should have done so at the first sign of her causing trouble or being dishonest or abusive.

This was a fatal error in my part, as the relationship went on, it became even more damaging to me.

So, my point is, try and be happy in yourself and do not put too much weight on the relationship being the key to your happiness. As although relationships can make you extremely happy. they are hard work.
Also, if you start a relationship with a psycho, the relationship can cause you more misery than anything.

So, think long and hard as to what you want out of a relationship and then look for a partner that fulfils your desires. But please dont look at the relationship as an answer to everything.

Apparently. also, if it is sex you are looking for. Then apparently some woman may not be bothered that you do not have a job. For example. how about woman who are unemployed.
Hope this helps

Last edited by madbutnotmad on 20 Dec 2016, 7:51 am, edited 2 times in total.

sorry dude. not sure what you mean by this.
Thanks

They likely are outgoing and have lots of covidence in oreder to get s girl to like them. That and bunch of them probably lie or manipulate women(lots of these guys out there) wat was it called, where guys are negative to work a Frio down into being with them?
I could probably lie tell women I have a good job and I'd probably get dates, depending on how long my savings last and I could keep up the lie I could probably get a gf, but it'll end sooner or later when I run out of money or they ask for a ride or to go to my place. I've seen inch of terrible guys get gf this way, but they eventually break up.

Also given the many "he's poor and not ambitious is it bad I want to break up even though I love him threads" and the divorce rates in the USA, that women do date losers but they also eventually leave them when they continue to fail to rise to meet their requirements. Imagine the reaction to a post titled "I love my gf but she has a small but is it wrong if I leave her" do they love them though? If they did that love would over rule everything else. I've seen people truely in love survive through all kinds if bad stuff. But my generation wants to bail as soon as anything not perfect. They'll too impatient and self interested. Truely the ME generation

There's also "my bf has a small penis and I want to leave him but I love him" threads all over the net too. Few I saw they said they missed their ex penis but not their ex.

I just want to be with someone to be with them I don't care about much else. Besides basics of personality and interests. And kids(no different then women who don't want kids)

Unfortunately, I think I have the functioning-as-an-adult ability of a 12-15 year old and can't snap out of it.

Why do you think you have the functioning-as-an-adult ability of a 12-15 year old?

Your kidneys.

They can make a steak and kidney pie from that!

I'm 25, but I never got to be employed and because my public transportation options honestly suck, I'm in my house all day. I could be going out to meet other people instead, but executive functioning problems make it hard. And I still feel very dependent on my parents.

How can I snap out of it?

What do women want from a relationship?

Well I don't know about other women, but I know what I'd like. I would like a fellow gamer, who likes or wants kids, accepting of my qwerks, very affectionate, prefers staying in but doesn't mind going out once in a while, doesn't mind being a househusband although I wouldn't mind having a maid/cleaner either. However, I realise this is probably the polar opposite of what most women want.

My point I'm trying to get is that everyone woman is different so what suits one, wouldn't suit another. A bit like personaility, I prefer guys who are intellectual and sterotypical geeks/nerds/otaku's but the next woman might like somoene altheltic, good social skills and watch sports regularally.

Also don't worry about growing up. It took me until I was 29 to decide I was going to grow up from 17. Even then its only a couple of years. I don't think I'll ever fully grow up, but at least I gained the responsability of knowing when I need to pay bills and how to sort out most issues when they arise.

Your type sounds a lot like mine Got to love a geeky gamer! Except my partner went to D & D without me today

Step 1.
Buy a car. You can use this for looking for work and for commuting. I've been in job interviews where they asked me how I'd get to work and they were pleased when I said "By car". I've since sold my car since I now work in the city and it's much faster for me to travel to the city by train than by car due to traffic congestion. However, you indicated that your city has terrible public transport so you'll definitely need a car.

Cars are also very helpful for dating. They expand your choice of dating locations and you can pick the girl up and drop her off. I find that I often have better conversations with my dates in my car because the car is quite environment that affords privacy. Maybe I shouldn't have sold my car. Also girls are more impressed when you own a car. It makes them see you as being more adult.

Step 2.
After the completion of step 1 you should have an easier time getting a job. This will help you get a girlfriend. I found that I got much more interest from girls when I quit my crappy old part time job and got a full time job in IT. If you get a similar job you'll likewise receive more interest from girls. Girls like professional guys.

Step 3.
Use the money from your job to get a nice apartment. Girls have been really impressed by new apartment. They like that it has a nice view from the balcony. Another reason to have your own place is that it gives you and your date privacy away from your parents. Girls need to feel comfortable in order to have sex, they won't feel comfortable if there are other people around. Actually I've never had sex anywhere but my own apartment or the apartment I lived in previously.

Also, if you're entertaining a young woman, it's much easier if you can use the entire home for this purpose. If you live in your parents house the only place you can have privacy is in your own bedroom. If you have your own place you can both retain privacy while watching movies in the living room, having sex in the living room (or any room of your choosing), cooking for her in the kitchen, eating at the dining table, having her cook for you in the kitchen, eating on the balcony (can't easily be seen from ground level), etc. Your childhood bedroom is not enough to entertain a young woman. It's not big enough and it won't impress her at all.

Furnish your apartment with a bed large enough for two people to lie down on with a sturdy headboard for support (optional, also get a couch large enough for two people to lie down on). Seriously, don't cheap out on the furniture because girls notice that. Also keep your apartment clean and tidy (after you get one).