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Karategurl
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22 Dec 2016, 7:09 pm

Do you tell people you have autism so they don't think that you are crazy and weird?



kraftiekortie
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22 Dec 2016, 7:34 pm

I would say it depends on the context.

In most instances, I probably wouldn't tell people I have autism.

People can be very prejudiced against autistic people, and frequently underestimate them.



BirdInFlight
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22 Dec 2016, 10:23 pm

I don't tell. There are many people in my life right now who would have no understanding of level 1 and it would likely bring more scorn than positive results.

On the other hand, at times and in certain situations I have had the thought occur to me that I should disclose.

There was an incident that occurred last week and I'm now carrying part of my diagnostic report around in my bag. I've never done that before.



Shahunshah
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22 Dec 2016, 10:25 pm

I sometimes say I am autistic when it is others that are talking about it. I don't them to get a picture that people on the spectrum are weird and strange so I tell them.



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22 Dec 2016, 10:39 pm

If its relevant. People dont need to know the full diagnoses, if i look normal im gonna let them think that theres nothing rpwrong with me. If they ask why i dont make eyecontact (which has never happened) i can tell them "eye contact is hard for me because i cant look at a person and hear what they say at the same time, its because of my autism, but i am listening."

Sometimes its completely necessary like at a hospital (so they know i dont like to he touched and im prone to meltdowns) and at school and in a workplace

Sometimes only certain things are necessary, like if im with a person in a overstimulating enviroment, it would be smart to tell them i can get overstimulated and will shut down.

Most people i hang out with already know im autistic. So explaining it doesnt come often.


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BirdInFlight
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22 Dec 2016, 10:48 pm

^^^^^Yes, I relate to telling just relevant bits -- like explaining "I can sometimes feel overwhelmed in this type of noisy environment" and similar things.

Like telling someone one trait relevant to the specific situation, rather than the whole diagnosis. I've been doing that more often lately.



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23 Dec 2016, 3:38 am

Personally, I have told all of the people that I care about enough to want them to know.

If people are important to me, they've been told first hand.

The rest of the time, I wear a very visible necklace with the autistic jigsaw ribbon on. That gives me confidence, because although I'm not outright telling people and many may not have a clue what it means, I at least feel like I'm not hiding that part of me and that there's never going to be some 'big reveal'. It was hard going to friends and family and announcing that I had autism, and it felt like it was coming from nothing, but my necklace is a sort of 'middle step'. Nobody's ever commented, but there are some people that I think would know what it symbolises and may have just thought it to themselves - there may even have been one or two hints from people, to show me that they know what it is.

Only one person has ever commented outright on the necklace, and that's a stranger that turned out to immediately afterwards show some autistic traits, so I think her comment of "that's a nice necklace" was her way of saying that she was autistic. So that was lovely and opened a communication up.

To me, it's just about planting the seed so that I don't need to make a grand announcement from nothing. And, if people are thinking that something's a bit 'off' and they recognise the necklace, they can assume that's why and there doesn't need to be an awkward discussion.



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23 Dec 2016, 4:06 am

Yes. Mainly because I think most people are honestly curious about what's wrong with me. Sometimes when I know I'm going to be in a place with a lot of people, I'll wear a t-shirt indicating I'm autistic.



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23 Dec 2016, 4:10 am

If it is relevant. If I am having a near meltdown over something seemingly insignificant, I address it. Otherwise, nope



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23 Dec 2016, 12:11 pm

Newly diagnosed, and I learnt within a week the value of keeping any actual admittance of having autism hidden. It grates a little. Perhaps so long as you are really comfortable with someone you trust, talking about it openly could be worthwhile. What I am going to keep in mind however is that a lot of people without autism don't, and don't want to, understand.


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23 Dec 2016, 1:05 pm

With me, I feel like I don't do a good job at hiding it because of my place on the spectrum. For people who know about Autism and particularly HFA, I think they know right away that I am Autistic. For people who I don't tell and that don't know about Autism, they might think I am really unusual and weird. I only recently told my best friend, and she didn't know what Autism was but was willing to learn and hasn't treated me any differently since.


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whatamievendoing
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23 Dec 2016, 1:58 pm

Usually I do, but how long I take to tell someone varies depending on the level of our relationship. I've made a note of letting my employers know about my AS, but aside from that, I don't tell many people until I feel I can trust them at the very least.


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teksla
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23 Dec 2016, 5:31 pm

EzraS wrote:
Yes. Mainly because I think most people are honestly curious about what's wrong with me. Sometimes when I know I'm going to be in a place with a lot of people, I'll wear a t-shirt indicating I'm autistic.

What kind of shirt. Im looking to get one for when i travel/am somewhere i am prone to being anxious/having meltdowns etc.


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owenc
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23 Dec 2016, 5:34 pm

I don't tell most people because I don't need to. (Aspergers has negative connotations in any case so I doubt telling complete strangers would help)

I have thus far only told immediate relatives and close friends i.e people that are required to know.



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23 Dec 2016, 8:02 pm

I have been tempted to get a pin. I am fond of pins and would wear it next to my star trek one, I think it would be appropriate. However, I wonder if most of the time its worth telling anyone because unless they have had personal experience interacting with someone with ASD, I feel like I'm going to have to go into a big explanation that I don't to have to deal with giving. I think Tony Attwood had the right idea, address it with out identifying the condition. Like instead of saying "I sometimes have issue with loud noises because I'm autistic." say instead "Loud environments sometimes make me feel anxious and its hard for me to concentrate so I may need to step away for a moment." It provides an explenation for why you aren't feeling well without someone trying to accuse you of using your condition as an "excuse," which is unfortunately common. As much as I would like to be loud and proud about having AS, there is to much ignorance regarding the condition for people to not react to you in sometimes very ignorant and negative ways.



SharkSandwich211
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23 Dec 2016, 8:44 pm

I tell other people that I think need to know or that I want to know.

I can see and appreciate both sides of the decision. ( to tell or not to tell) with that said though....

To tell:....I see it as an opportunity to change a person's reference point. How are those among us ever going to get comfortable with us being around if they don't know we are here? In addition, as a parent with children on the spectrum, In my mind, by telling someone today, my hope is that my kid's tomorrow will be better and more accepting of their differences and if that means a little discomfort today, a snide remark, loss of a potential friend, then so be it.

Not to tell: ...backlash, dumb lockstep thinking that cannot challenge their own safe norms is a possibility but....(see to tell ^^^)

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