Should i get a personal assistant or not

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Hello. 2 weeks ago i got diagnosed with aspergers syndrome after one year of testing. I am 16 years old and im a girl. I struggle a lot at school, and my mom asked me if i thought it would help to have a personal assistant there. Right now i have 3 different people that work at my school that try to help me, but its a very unfortunate system. I get kind of cought in the middle and they all have other things to do at all times. I very often sit alone banging my head in the brick wall in the basement, cutting myself or just sitting a place drawing. I get very frustrated because i cant express myself how i want to, and though im high functioning i struggle a lot with the everyday life.

Once a week im at a farm with youth with disabilities like me, and its the best day. Im very grateful for those days. Then we are 5 young adults and 2-3 teachers that work with the animals and other farm tasks. I learn a lot, socially, with animals and about myself. I have "thoughend up".

To the point, a year ago, one of the teachers at school said i should be having a personal assistant, but that i had no formal diagnosis to say that i needed one. Now i do, but im not sure i want it. Yes, i notice that the classes that i do have a personal assistant i work a lot better, and manage to participate in more classes, but it also makes me extremely frustrated as i need A LOT of alone time. I cannot handle someone following me everywhere and watching over me all the time! Ive tried that and it makes me so angry! Yet its not really safe for me to be alone, though i dont want to admit it, and i do benefit from someone encouraging me.

Im not sure if i could handle having a personal assistant, and im kind of afraid it will make the other students look at me as even more difficoult to approach, i dont know. I have a hard time trusting people, and if someone does something to break my trust, making me trust them again is almost impossible. I just cant. Whats a fact is i get tired of how the situation is at the moment, and its been like this on and off for 2 Years. I have 6 months left at my current school, before im going to artschool.

I really want to own a farm one day and start my own business as a potter and farmer, and i want to host camps for autistics. People laugh at me when i say so, but i cant see myself having a happy life as something else. Maybe as a zookeeper but then i would have a lot of interaction and i would have to be in a workenvironment and i dont like that. One of my obsessions is planning the future, so i do that a lot,

But again, im off topic. The question is, do you think i should agree to applying for a personal assistant, or do you see a better solution?

As for the personal assistant, how about giving it a try? You can always change your mind later, right?

As for owning your own farm and starting your own business as a potter and farmer, I would encourage you to follow your dream.

There were people who laughed at me when I started out as a fine art photographer, accusing me of not being a real artist. Well, since then, my artwork has been on display in juried exhibits at art galleries, museums, libraries and most recently, a solo show in a government building. And I currently sell my work in an online store. No, I'm not getting rich ... but yes, I'm an artist.

There will always be critics and naysayers. Just continue to be your best self, and work hard.

I wish you every success!