Too ugly for love!

Post Reply New Topic

Hello, everyone!

This is my first time here. 

I can't get over the fact that nobody will ever like me, no matter what I do. 

I am am very unfortunate. My face is extremely hideous and there is nothing I can do about it. I have people come up to me and make fun of my face. Nobody ever wants to initiate a conversation with me as they cannot bear to ever look me in the eye. 

Furthermore, I have also tried asking for advice online for tips on enhancing my appearance, only to get completely obliterated by people mocking the way I look and telling me that I will always be hopeless. 

At times, nobody even cares to respond.  Everybody ignores me. Nobody thinks I am worth it. 

Even I don't value myself anymore.  


What should I do?

I just want to be loved. 

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. For example a couple of my ex's went out with people uglier than me if that is possible. Also I see couples together and really wonder why they are together. My theory is money. So go and get a great job then women would care less about what you look like.

But all joking aside I don't really know how ugly you are so I can't tell you what to do so I would find you more attractive. Then that would only be what I find attractive and its apparently different from the norm, but I wasn't planning on being normal to begin with. So just wait and do what you can to improve yourself in the mean time, until the right person comes along.

I bet you're not that ugly----lots of people think themselves ugly because they FEEL ugly (often, because they don't like themselves; and, for an Aspie, that's totally understandable).

It's a little more difficult for a guy----for instance, I knew a woman who had a terribly unfortunate face, but because she dressed-to-the-nines, she was very attractive (plus, she had the sweetest personality)----but, maybe you could dress really fashionable?

No that is not true. If you are overweight, then you can exercise. If your facial features look bad, then you can do plastic surgeries. If your teeth look awful, then you can do orthodontics and/or get teeth polishing. If your glasses make you look too nerdy, then you can do laser eye surgery. If your skin look sickly, then buy yourself vitamins and look after your health. If you have too much freckles, then you can do laser cosmetic treatments to remove them. Lol we are in the 21st century, the only thing you can't change at all is your default cognitive ability.

And btw, I have been bullied in middle school for being "ugly". But now after getting to a good weight, getting the laser eye surgery, and almost finishing up with orthodontics, I am attractive enough to find myself casual sexual partners. My face now only looks average instead of ugly, but lots of people comment they love my body. I will be saving money to do rhinoplasty and to get rid of some moles on my face, and that would be the last obviously unattractive features that I need to change. After that I am sure I will look attractive enough to be considered by most people.

They tell you ugliness does not matter, people only value inner qualities. That is true in terms of friendships but it is a total lie in terms of romantic relationships. You need to be attractive enough for others to even consider you at all unless you inner qualities are very very special (CEO of a company, literally the sweetest personality, winning awards, etc.) which most people' aren't. So I guess accept the fact and try to save money and change your lifestyle to make yourself look better. Of course also work on your personality so you can keep the person interested after you pass the initial attractiveness test!

Best of luck!

Most people can't afford plastic or laser eye surgery.

That is because most people are not willing to work their asses off and not spending on anything else besides basic essentials to pay for them. I mean, OP if this seriously affects your happiness, get a full time job for weekday and a part time job for weekend and don't buy expensive luxuries, you will be able to save those money. They are together in fact less than a year of university tuition + living fees!

I will use me as an example (in CAD):
Exercise: $200 commitment for clothes and GOOD running shoes. If you run long, you will lose weight.
Plastic surgery (rhinoplasty) : estimated less than $8000 judging from phone calls to clinics
Orthodontics: $7000
Laser eye surgery: $2000
Laser cosmetic treatments): estimated $1200 judging from phone calls to clinics
Vitamins & protein supplements: <300 per year

Disregarding vitamins, the total cost is $18400. And my computer science program's university tuition in Ontario is around $14000, that plus living expenses is much greater than $18400. All of these surgeries and treatments have financing options, and please don't tell me you can't save enough money to be in university for a year unless you are seriously disabled.

The girl is right somewhat, looks do matter in dating but they're not everything either. Often times, how you look is going to dictate if a girl see's you as dating material or not. However, it's definitely not everything. While being attractive may get you the interview, it's your personality, confidence and demeanor which gets you the job.


The question is OP, what are you doing to improve yourself? What are things you should be doing to improve yourself? Here's a couple for you.


-Go to the gym and workout. If you're too fat, you need to hit the gym and do running, and workout with weight with low weight and high reps to burn off fat. If you're too skinny, then do high weight and low reps and eat plenty of protein.

-Watch what you eat.

-Start putting more effort into your appearence. Comb your hair, brush your teeth, everyday.

-Challenge yourself to talk to one new person everyday.

-Develop your hobbies and interests, stop jacking off to porn, get your asss off the couch and go do something more productive with your life.

-Don't be afraid to get out of your comfort zone.

No guy should ever get rid of his glasses!! !! That is one of my biggest turn ons in a guy

Start by loving yourself and finding value in yourself - everything about you will build upon that as a foundation.

Most people can tell when a person does not.

That is exactly my point, one needs to pass an attractiveness threshold to be even considered by most people, after the threshold though, it will depend on many other things. But in order to pass the threshold, OP needs to do serious work. Maybe living a healthy lifestyle is enough, maybe not depending where the unattractiveness stems from in OP's case. And if you think technology can help you, go for it!

Best of luck OP!

And OP, there's nothing wrong with being average either. Don't get into the mindset where you think you have to be a model to get girls because you really don't. You don't even have to be rich either, I don't know how old you are but of course when you're in your mid twenties or younger, money won't matter as much.

But you should DEFINITELY take care of your appearence, no question about it. That means taking care of your personal hygiene, don't skip a day of showering, getting a better haircut if you have to. You don't wanna look like a slob, it won't help you in life.


You should also workout as well if you're not already. OP, you may never be able to get a six pack or look ripped if you're fat, it just depends on your body type but by going to the gym and working on your body, you're going to feel better about yourself because you accomplished something rather than sit at home all day jacking off to Alexis Texas.

If you're afraid of what people will think of you, just think about it this way. If you get laughed at just because you're the fat out of shape guy at the gym, then f*k them. At least you're trying to get in better shape, that's not something to laugh about but to be inspired by.

Are you serious...people can't afford laser eye surgery or plastic surgery because they aren't willing to work their asses off and buy expensive luxuries? How about it's expensive and most people don't have thousands of dollars to spend on cosmetic surgeries, regardless of how hard they're working at their job.

Lol who has 18,400 dollars to spend on that kind of stuff.

Who has said your face is ugly, people in real life literally come up to you and mock you for your face? Or is this like a certain website or something where people are doing this? If it is just a certain website or something chances are they're just being bullies and you're not even that bad looking. I had something like that happen to me back when myspace used to have forums, but yeah they were essentially full of crap...just trying to make me feel bad.

Also though if you want an accurate advice or anything might want to post a pic...I mean people here are making assumptions about your weight and all kinds of stuff that could perhaps effect how your face looks, but without a picture to see what the issue is its all just guessing.

Well I haven't gotten rhinoplasty and cosmetic laser mole removal yet but I have already spent on other stuff. I got it done because they affected me in a very negative way. I guess it is about priorities, for example, I don't pay for a TV subscription and I don't buy more clothes than I need to, so I gotta save the money to improve my appearance. And believe it or not, getting rid of the glasses + the weird shaped teeth already has already helped a lot. I want to spend the money because it would make me happy, it would make life easier for me. And the money can be saved by no vacations, no more new clothes, no more movie tickets and TV, plus lots of hard work for a year or two.

And most people CAN save an additional $18,400, how about adding evening and weekend part-time jobs? The only excuse is that the person does not want the money bad enough and is not willing to do the extra work or the person is unable to work due to illnesses or disabilities.

Of course anyone is free to choose what they think are more important to spend the money on. I am just suggesting this solution to OP because it seems to seriously affect his self esteem. Real ugly people who are not overweight are considered ugly generally because they have facial abnormalities which can be fixed by modern technologies, at least that was my case. I don't regret a single cent I have spent on my appearance, and I hope OP can fight for whatever he wants as well!:)

Do you pay rent, pay your utilities, buy your own food, pay for a phone, a car, car insurance ect? Lol my boyfriend is 32 and has worked various full time jobs and he's never had 18,400 at a time. Lol and he's never been in a position to afford 'vacations' let along going out and buying a bunch of new clothes all the time. When I met him he didn't even have a bed. Lol most people would be extremely lucky to make 18,400 in a year let alone save up that much extra after all their bills and living costs are taken care of.

I mean good for you being able to afford all that I suppose, but most people simply don't have that much money at one time ever, and aren't in a situation they could save that much in a reasonable amount of time even if they do work as many hours as they can get. I think it would make a good case to expand medicaid to cover that kind of thing like if there really is a problem like crooked teeth or things are misshapen not just cause they want a different look.

Also though I still say until the O.P posts a picture, there is no way to know how ugly they even are...they might just think that.

Hello sweet leaf, I wasn't able to provide the link to my photo in the comments section or the post.

I private messaged you. I just want to check if it sent.