Feeling alien-like / inhuman?

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Since I was 5, I've always felt like some sort of alien. I feel like nobody truly understands who or what I am. I'd stargaze a lot and think of myself as some kind of other species. I've always despised sci-fi, because it just isn't accurate, and my IQ level is around 140. I have depression and anxiety due to that, but I think that's because I'm constantly having existential crises and wanting to get off of this planet.

In my head, I always refer to other humans as it, like they're another species. And I'm always so disgusted in them, calling them 'pathetic beings without a purpose'. I've tried to vent about this before, but people just get mad at me and tell me I'm pretentious, or try to contradict my statement by saying 'Well, you're human too, so you hate yourself!' (Yeah, I do.) I keep my distance as much as I can and don't speak to them. It's not me trying to be cool or edgy, or trying to make people think I'm some sort of weird alien hybrid, I just want to live my life, but I don't want to 'fix' myself. I don't want to be anything like anyone else, I just want to be me. I wish people would understand how strange I felt without trying to change me. I'm still so young, so why do I feel so capable, and why do I feel as if everyone around me is below me?

I feel inhuman but for the opposite reason, I feel I'm inferior and that people find me annoying and that I'll never be able to find whatever place in this world. Sometimes I feel like I don't care about others and happy but then suddenly I get depressed and hopeless in the same day, that's what happened even today and I have no idea what's the trigger of this.

Sorry for the unrelated reply but when I read "inhuman" I felt like expressing myself even though more than inhuman I feel a subhuman.

I feel inhuman but not in better-worse sense. Most accurate description would be me being an alien anthropologist. I feel am just a guest here so I try not to interfere with the society rules nor judge people, just observe and learn. The fact I am stuck here and forced to live between humans sometimes hurts, especially when differences show up but I try not to focus on the bad things.

For me living with Asperger is like living in constant state of culture shock.

I felt inhuman as well especially as a preteen and young teen. I really thought I was a different species. Sometimes I still feel that way.

I remember one evening very well, when I was maybe 7 years old. I locked myself in a room crying my eyes out after some kind of reaction I got from my mother, thinking "I'm surely not a human being, just an alien inside a human body". I spent hours looking at atlas of the sky, trying to figure out where my real parents/creators could come from, why have they abandoned me here and thinking of ways I could contact them. I felt totally alone.

Almost 30 years from that evening, I'm still feeling like an alien, but one who understands more about humans around me, who observes people sometimes but more often an alien who just doesn't bother with close relationships and is quite happy in her own little world.
Only when I enter a close relationship with NT person (usually of a romantic kind), after some time trying to remain in it, I start seeing again that I'm not like them in so many aspects and that causes quite a lot of pain and anxiety.
Away from close relationships, I think I actually resemble a human being now and I'm definitely happier now than 20-25 years ago.

I feel like an alien all the time. I tell myself that there are some things about this world and about human society that I will never understand. I feel like I'm from a planet that's 100 years ahead of the Earth as far as social roles are concerned, that has a post-gender society. The country on that planet that I'm from is very much like Germany, with the same flag.

Human? Why would I want to be human?

I grew up thinking it was normal to feel like an alien, because civilization had happened faster than our brains could adapt to living in it. I think that particularly mal-adjusted people wind up as our leaders as a way to deal with their own stress and the new opportunities, ruining happiness and justice for most other people.

Ever since making the transition from adolescent to adult, I have always felt like an utter fraud of a human being.

I speak too formally, and seemingly every conversation I share with another human being appears to be rather contrived and lacking in authenticity.

I once cut myself just to make absolutely sure that my blood was red. On a personal level, autism is a tremendously alienating experience.

Around the middle of high school I think I managed to actually convince my friends that I did indeed come from another planet past Pluto that traveled in an orbit that made it impossible to be seen from Earth. So, yah, I get it. I struggled with depression and anxiety then (and now) and my high IQ just made it that much more difficult. Being a teen is hard even for neurotypical kids and it just gets more complicated if you aren't. It is managable though and you can get past it.

No, I do not feel alien, ever. OK, I've sometimes felt like I'm on the outside of a big bubble looking in, but still not alien though. OK, I've even felt alone before, like I was the only one in the whole universe with ASD. But, somehow, still not alien.

The reason why I say this is because ASD is not the only human diversity in existence. Even neurotypicals with (terminal) cancer can feel misunderstood, no matter how much care and sympathy others give. So ASD is just one of many diversities.

It's pretentiousness. Or rather it's justified pretentiousness.

When I was a child/adolescent I had a really hard time grasping "You're younger, so your opinion matters the least." And to an extent I still do. I would find it beyond frustrating that I could converse with my sister (who's IQ is 152) and even debate her and pull apart her arguments yet be told that I'm "just a moody teen going through puberty". It's one of the reasons I fell in love with forums. There was no bias, I was free. I could converse and debate with people without being butted out or told "well you're just a kid."