As if I cease to exist temporarily

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Does anyone else feel like you practically cease to exist when you're forced to deal with nonsense and BS that you can't be honest about? Right now I'm thinking mostly work (I never even interact with any work contacts other than through text, but it still bothers me immensely). Sometimes it's family or other things. Situations that I'm fully aware will be made worse if I express my thoughts or feelings, but where I still can't just isolate myself, and still need to express something coherent.

It's like even just the awareness that there's an unresolved situation of that kind is enough for my whole brain to transmutate. My sleep, digestion and whatnot get out of whack. And it's as if the part of my brain that is normally in charge of informing me who I am gets repurposed for the task of "playing along until this charade is over". When this happens, enjoyable things stop being enjoyable, because the one thing that I want in the universe is for "the charade to be over" so I can go back to believing I don't owe anyone anything. Video games and such can't do that for me, so it's just frustrating.

I believe that if I have a disability, it's really this. I'm technically capable of functioning like a regular adult, but it's incompatible with my existence as a person. It's only compatible with my existence as a zombie / flaming ball of anger / walking existential crisis. In my life as it is, I know it's fortunately temporary. But it really doesn't feel like it is. I feel like I need to just say "alright, f**k this, I'm out" right now or I'll be trapped forever.

I wouldn't say I cease to exist but it does really bother me if I'm in an unresolved situation to the point where I get super anxious and have trouble sleeping. It's certainly worse than my partner because if we're having a 'minor' argument (they always seem major to me!) sometimes he'll want to go to bed and I kind of freak out and have to resolve everything or I take ages sleeping, also if I'm arguing with someone on the internet (which I have had to stop doing now) I get consumed by it until the other person replies and I obsess over whether I'm being factually correct.

I feel like I also get a similar thing to you in that I give my opinion in situations where it is really not needed and interfere in other people's stuff sometimes, it's a really bad habit and for me it comes from the belief that I'm more intelligent than everyone else and I can stop them faffing over whatever ridiculous argument they're having.

Anyway, I feel you and something that sometimes helps me is either to meditate a bit and really try and just be in the real world and out of my head for a bit (this can be hard and I often fail) or to have a conversation with an inanimate object about the anxious situation so you can kind of talk it out but you don't have to discuss with a human.

I don't feel I cease to exist. If anything, I become more aware, to the point of being ill from nerves. It is the worst feeling, even worse than when I'm fighting an actual cold or flu.

I was in a sh***y situation, but I think I also underestimated the effect of a day and a half without my usual meds.

What I do in self defense is shut out the bad, focus on the good, and make my life revolve around the good. For better or for worse. Sometimes you lose the battle that way, but it helps you win the war.