How do I start feeling less bitter?

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It's tough out here in the dating world. I read that the statistics aren't really great, and it seems like guys are even less in the statistical favor. I do get the fear that I'll never achieve what I desire in any relationship, if there are any at all. I also have some passing time anxiety, as I feel like time is running out. I also wish I can find a way to start working too. I was kind of a loser, but I'm in college now, so I can't focus on work at all until I'm finished.

Also, is it really so bad if a guy wants a girl who has certain looks and is above him in that department? Its actually sad that for lots of guys, we are less likely to ever find someone who may be considered "good-looking" in some common regard. And everybody seems to think that it necessarily equates to being a "model".

Why would somebody who is above you in the looks department choose you if they could have someone better-looking? If you were better-looking, what would make you choose someone less good-looking than you?


Less attractive women have issues attracting more attractive guys too. That's just the way it is.

If you want a more attractive partner than yourself, I'd imagine the first step would be figuring out what you have to offer that would make them pick you, and build on that as you deem necessary.

Eat more sugar.

Why would you want someone who is considered "good-looking" in some common regard? Wouldn't it make more sense to seek out someone you are attracted to?

I don't really care if others find my so attractive. I'd better find him attractive though

Yeah, when I was younger I got ghosted and called ugly more times than I can count. Then you realise you don’t need someone “good looking”, your ego does. Now at age 32, the most unattractive person is someone who isn’t interested in me. I only learned this in my late 20s.

Dating success is 50/50. These successful women have to have a successful man if they’re straight. Women don’t just date themselves, if a woman is successful, so is a man.

You can have a part time job for a few hours a week studying.

If you want someone who is better looking than you, you have to have more to offer than other potential dates. This usually means social skills.

I can't have a part time job, because even though I'm 25, my own mom still "wants what is best for me" and she wouldn't open her mind to any rebuttal I want to argue with. Besides, I take the ride to campus from 7:30-8:00 in the morning, and I don't return home until close to 5:00 in the evening.

And what am I going to do, especially if all job requirements demand more skills or experience, or otherwise it's too fast-paced or physically demanding. I wish I can break free too, but as long as my own mom doesn't want me to "stress out" mentally or physically... I also wish I better understood my boundaries of what I can and can not do because of my physical disability.

I just wish I was able to successfully manipulate her to not say "no" or be a gatekeeper to every scheme/plan/desire I have, no matter how worried or irrational she thinks it is.

But yeah, sometimes I still feel like I am living in hell and can't do anything, but at least I'm going to school again, now. Problem is that I suffer low-confidence because I never even had any "official" paid employment before, and it will be too late and I already ruined my social image.

You don’t need experience to get most minimum wage jobs. I speak from having 6 with no experience in all 6 industries.

I’ve probably had about 10 jobs all up.

shop
Supermarket
Waitress
Bartender
Receptionist
Game tester

Just walk into places and ask. You can likey get a pub job for a few hours a week at night. I did that while studying.

It's not bad to want that, but you should keep in mind that the women who you consider to be above you in looks might have the same thing in mind and want a guy who is above them. This kind of thinking is just as okay for them as it is for you.

As for how you can get a girl like that... well, I suppose it comes down to your personality and if you can find a girl who likes it. The biggest problem there is that people usually get their first impression about another person from their looks, so if someone doesn't find the other attractive they are less likely to try to get to know them.



This debends a bit on where you're from. Where I'm from, lot of people are unemployed and getting a job is really hard, so the competition for most jobs, even simple, low paid ones, is very high and if there's someone with more experience they're likely to be chosen.

But of course it's worth a try and it's not like I know what the situation is where K_Kelly comes from.

People are attracted to those who have a positive and upbeat attitude. The most beautiful women are those who are upbeat. Being positive is a choice. I am happy because I choose to be happy. I have plenty of reasons to think, "poor me" and wallow in unhappiness. I don't define happiness by how good I look, my employment situation, my income status. I don't let external things like weather or the economy or traffic jams affect my mood. It really is that simple. Be happy by deciding to be happy. Once you jump starts it builds like a rolling snowball. When you are happy in yourself you will attracted other happy people. And life gets better.

It’s the same here. Only one of my minimum wage jobs was advertised. You have to cold call.

So you admit that successful women won’t date down?


Wish more women would realize that.

I seem to get the most attention from women who make more than me.

How much more do they make? How much do you make?

They make 1 and a half to 4 times more. I currently make $11 per hour.

Full time? Also do they actually try to date you or just talk to you.