Do you also have alexithymia?

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I thought I was calm before a dentist appointment, not bothered by it at all, and then I realized my hands were shaking. I can be depressed for days, and then suddenly realize I've been depressed all this time.

I can say that I'm not alexithymic in any way. I have no trouble whatsoever making sense of my own emotions.

Coincidentally, I had an interesting discussion about a similar topic with a colleague last night. She's not alexithymic either, but apparently she does have a mental disorder that can cause her to feel two opposite emotions at the same time. In a way, I empathize with her - while I don't personally suffer with it, I can go from 0 to 100 in the blink of an eye.

Yes.

I didn't think I even had emotions for a long time. Whilst I often don't have emotions/empathy set off in a situation where other people's would be, and can respond very vulcan-like, when they are there I often fail to recognise them.

Even worse at distinguishing them - even when I understood I had emotions, I then thought I still completely lacked the subtler ones. I was quite excited a few months ago to discover that there was one set I could distinguish. I automatically begin flicking my middle finger against my thumb when more 'on edge' / energetic. Unhappy = no flicking, worried = flicking. Content = no flicking, excited = flicking. I can distinguish some subtle ones now! I just have to learn to read my body responses better, then infer back.

I'm not good at reading other people's either. I'd be able to get the basics, but I'm out at the advanced level.

I don't, however, have the scarcity of imagination and boring dreams that alexithymics have.

Alexithymia was identified about 20-25 years before autism in me, though no-one ever called it that.

The first time I had counselling (CBT), the counsellor was forever saying that I needed to "open up more" or "be more honest" otherwise the counselling would not work, because I nearly always honestly answered "I don't know" if I was asked how something made me feel. I felt like I was being accused of lying or covering something up, even though the "emotional detachment" was one of the reasons I wanted counselling to begin with.

Like the OP said, it can make dealing with depression very difficult. Everyone always says to ask for help when there are early warning signs, before it gets too bad, but I'm just unable to notice them unless someone else points it out to me. I wouldn't even think of asking for help unless I'm starting to have thoughts of self-harm or my performance in a job is suffering badly because of it.

So I googled it and found this test: http://www.alexithymia.us/test-alex.html.

I did that because when I saw the poll, and my first reaction was "I have absolutely no clue how to answer that!"

In the test, I probably answered the majority of the questions with "Undecided", so I'm don't really have much confidence in the results. I guess I have difficulty identifying or explaining whether I have difficulty identifying or explaining my feelings.


In any case, here's my results:
Test Results: 126 Points

You show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Difficulty Identifying Feelings: 18 Points <15 - 18>
In this category you show some alexithymic traits.

Category: Difficulty Describing Feelings: 14 Points <10 - 12>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Vicarious Interpretation of Feelings: 7 Points <8 - 9>
In this category you show no alexithymic traits.

Category: Externally-Oriented Thinking: 26 Points <18 - 21>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Restricted Imaginative Processes: 22 Points <18 - 21>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Problematic Interpersonal Relationships: 21 Points <15 - 18>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Sexual Difficulties and Disinterest: 18 Points <10 - 12>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Test Results: 149 Points

Great, another disorder!! I think that makes 4 (ASD, GAD and Prosopagnosia, as well). I think I should volunteer to be the subject of a psychiatric study, I provide can provide Psychiatrists with so many disorders and all in one place. Very labour saving for them.

^^ Probably not much consolation, but alexithymia is usually considered a set of traits rather than a condition in its own right. Notably, Wikipedia has this to say about it...

I can’t say I do. I have the occasional difficulty identifying a feeling, but nowhere near enough to actually be considered alexithymia.

Test Results: 126 Points

Alexithymia: You show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Difficulty Identifying Feelings: 23 Points <15 - 18>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Difficulty Describing Feelings: 20 Points <10 - 12>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Vicarious Interpretation of Feelings: 10 Points <8 - 9>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Externally-Oriented Thinking: 28 Points <18 - 21>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Restricted Imaginative Processes: 13 Points <18 - 21>
In this category you show no alexithymic traits.

Category: Problematic Interpersonal Relationships: 22 Points <15 - 18>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Sexual Difficulties and Disinterest: 10 Points <10 - 12>
In this category you show no alexithymic traits.

Ooh, there's now a test on this thread.

Test Results: 142 Points

Category: Difficulty Identifying Feelings: 27 Points <15 - 18>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Difficulty Describing Feelings: 19 Points <10 - 12>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Vicarious Interpretation of Feelings: 7 Points <8 - 9>
In this category you show no alexithymic traits.

Category: Externally-Oriented Thinking: 34 Points <18 - 21>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Restricted Imaginative Processes: 16 Points <18 - 21>
In this category you show no alexithymic traits.

Category: Problematic Interpersonal Relationships: 27 Points <15 - 18>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Sexual Difficulties and Disinterest: 12 Points <10 - 12>
In this category you show some alexithymic traits.

I wouldn't say I always know exactly what I'm feeling, but usually I at least have a good idea of it. I do have trouble describing my emotions, but then again, I often have trouble finding the right words to describe anything.

Test results: 108 Points

Category: Difficulty Identifying Feelings: 12 Points <15 - 18>
In this category you show no alexithymic traits.

Category: Difficulty Describing Feelings: 17 Points <10 - 12>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Vicarious Interpretation of Feelings: 6 Points <8 - 9>
In this category you show no alexithymic traits.

Category: Externally-Oriented Thinking: 27 Points <18 - 21>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Restricted Imaginative Processes: 11 Points <18 - 21>
In this category you show no alexithymic traits.

Category: Problematic Interpersonal Relationships: 19 Points <15 - 18>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Sexual Difficulties and Disinterest: 16 Points <10 - 12>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

I did the quiz...I got:

102, some alexithymia traits.

Category: Difficulty Identifying Feelings: 25 Points <15 - 18>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Difficulty Describing Feelings: 14 Points <10 - 12>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Vicarious Interpretation of Feelings: 12 Points <8 - 9>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Externally-Oriented Thinking: 13 Points <18 - 21>
In this category you show no alexithymic traits.

Category: Restricted Imaginative Processes: 10 Points <18 - 21>
In this category you show no alexithymic traits.

Category: Problematic Interpersonal Relationships: 20 Points <15 - 18>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Sexual Difficulties and Disinterest: 8 Points <10 - 12>
In this category you show no alexithymic traits.

I just took the test, and apparently I have “high alexithymic traits.” I scored 131, but I take that with a grain of salt since maybe I exaggerated some questions.

Score is 114. The romantic questions threw it off. I didn't know I had this.

I scored 105,

Your result is broken down into various factors to give you some insight into your result.

Category: Difficulty Identifying Feelings: 15 Points <15 - 18>
In this category you show no alexithymic traits.

Category: Difficulty Describing Feelings: 13 Points <10 - 12>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Vicarious Interpretation of Feelings: 9 Points <8 - 9>
In this category you show some alexithymic traits.

Category: Externally-Oriented Thinking: 19 Points <18 - 21>
In this category you show some alexithymic traits.

Category: Restricted Imaginative Processes: 17 Points <18 - 21>
In this category you show no alexithymic traits.

Category: Problematic Interpersonal Relationships: 21 Points <15 - 18>
In this category you show high alexithymic traits.

Category: Sexual Difficulties and Disinterest: 11 Points <10 - 12>
In this category you show some alexithymic traits.

My main problem would be the vocabularies not only with emotions, but with thoughts too -- internally and externally. I can identify my own feelings, I just couldn't describe. That makes a lot of sense in my case.
This might be where my score goes, other than apathy/asociality/asexuality/perhaps aromance... I also know what I 'missed' and choose not to acknowledge it, or don't really know how to remedy it...

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